# Yourself online vs. Yourself in real life



## Huilunsoittaja (Apr 6, 2010)

What do you think? Who are you?'

For the last 4 years I've tried really hard to align myself so both my online and offline presences are congruent. This means I've become more bold to talk about controversial, touchy subjects in real life, and I've also become a bit less heated on the internet. I'm not chatter box in real life, but I've learned to be more articulate and express my thoughts more clearly. So, I would say I'm "pretty similar" to my real life way of speaking with people.


----------



## Morimur (Jan 23, 2014)

OP: Yes, I am as perfect in real life as I am online.

You're welcome.


----------



## ArtMusic (Jan 5, 2013)

I think I am straight forward as many of my friends say. What you see from me is what you get. So I guess in real life I am much like I am online.


----------



## Dim7 (Apr 24, 2009)

ArtMusic said:


> I think I am straight forward as many of my friends say. What you see from me is what you get. So I guess in real life I am much like I am online.


You make polls all the time IRL?


----------



## Ingélou (Feb 10, 2013)

I am probably more careful online than I am in real life, where the warmth of conversation will get me going & I can put my foot in it. But I try to be similar online and off, & I think I *am* pretty similar.

It's a pity I can't have this wonderful edit facility in real life, though.


----------



## Crudblud (Dec 29, 2011)

I think I'm generally far less articulate in person and I tend to be quite absent minded, forgetting what I was originally talking about and indulging in digressions more frequently than Tristram Shandy.


----------



## Manxfeeder (Oct 19, 2010)

Ingélou said:


> I am probably more careful online than I am in real life.


I agree. In-person conversations are fleeting, but online discussions are forever.


----------



## SarahNorthman (Nov 19, 2014)

I am very similar in real life to the online me. I am a little more eloquent online, and tend to curse like a sailor most of the time in real life. But I am genuinely a nice person in both places. I think I tend to tone down the fangirl Sarah online as I dont want to scare away any people. If you want to see that side of me, then by all means let me know.  I also think I am more social online than I am in person. I am a very introverted person in reality, so I think that makes me a bit more social online.


----------



## Abraham Lincoln (Oct 3, 2015)

Online I'm generally a very composed, peace-loving individual. In real life I am somewhat prone to behaving like a scared cat.


----------



## Guest (Nov 28, 2015)

Where's the don't know enough to say option?


----------



## TradeMark (Mar 12, 2015)

Well, I'm a terrible writer so I'm pretty bad at expressing myself in text. But I'm also pretty bad at expressing myself verbally, so it matches up.


----------



## ptr (Jan 22, 2013)

..the only difference is that I'm much slower on-line as most of the conversation is carried out in a foreign language, also, wit and irony translates less well on the internet and those are my main tools IRL!

/ptr


----------



## Guest (Nov 28, 2015)

I've got two answers.

First, I don't know. You tell me what I'm like and I'll tell you whether that's how people who meet me in real life seem to respond to me.

Second, being on the internet and discussing with you and others here IS real life, and therefore how I behave here is consistent with who I am.


----------



## Jeff W (Jan 20, 2014)

It may seem hard to believe but I am actually less outgoing in real life than I am here. Somehow I feel more comfortable talking to everyone here than to (most) people in real life.


----------



## SarahNorthman (Nov 19, 2014)

Jeff W said:


> It may seem hard to believe but I am actually less outgoing in real life than I am here. Somehow I feel more comfortable talking to everyone here than to (most) people in real life.


I feel this is becoming more common as technology advances.


----------



## Pugg (Aug 8, 2014)

Morimur said:


> OP: Yes, I am as perfect in real life as I am online.
> 
> You're welcome.


Hear, Hear :tiphat:


----------



## Woodduck (Mar 17, 2014)

In real life, having long since received all possible infractions and a lifelong ban from a hostile universe, I feel free to say exactly what I think in whatever words I please, yet can rarely be bothered to get into debates about anything. This makes me, paradoxically, both more outspoken and more affable in real life than here, where trying to be genuine while second-guessing the forum censors can result in a more formal and cumbersome style of self-expression.

All in all, though, I'm basically myself here, only with more convoluted sentences. I'm hoping that semicolons and subordinate clauses help to stave off senility.


----------



## Gaspard de la Nuit (Oct 20, 2014)

In terms of the way I express myself, online I am pretty outspoken/ outgoing/ will reach out to other people and discuss difficulties and victories of all sorts - it's probably because I feel a kind of distance - even though I'm not at all anonymous, I can be 'here' without being here.

Like plenty of others (I imagine), in real life I'm a morbid introvert, no real-life friends or anything, uses the absolute minimum word count, won't talk about anything remotely personal. Not that I really want to be that way, it's just the effect of circumstance on my personality.


----------



## Tristan (Jan 5, 2013)

I am not all that different, but there are some important differences, the main one being that I don't typically associate with people who rub me the wrong way or with people I disagree with strongly in real life. On the internet, I come across people like that all the time. So I tend to be a bit more argumentative online and I'm more "toned down" in real life. But many things are the same--I'm still quiet, awkward, and shy online just as I am in real life. Some things don't change.


----------



## Weston (Jul 11, 2008)

I tend to hold off on controversial opinions in both worlds for the same reasons. On FaceBook for instance, I am still aware I need to maintain a modicum of hirability (if that's a word). I think a lot of my quite liberal views would put off some of the more Neanderthal types we still depend on in this life and I don't want to burn bridges anywhere. 

Aside from that, I'm more articulate on line because I have time to think about what I write. This is one of many reasons I despise the telephone for all but the closest friendship interactions.


----------



## adriesba (Dec 30, 2019)

Fun topic. I'm not sure what to put yet, but I want to bump this thread.


----------



## EdwardBast (Nov 25, 2013)

I think I tend to be more measured, careful, and courteous online than in person. There are two likely reasons for this. When face to face one feels obliged to respond immediately whether one has chosen ones words carefully or not, simply because ten minute pauses tend to be uncomfortable conversation killers. Also, the first internet forums I participated in were professional ones hosted by the American Musicological Society and the Society for Music Theory, and on these forums codes of collegial conduct were more strictly enforced than on even well-moderated forums like TC.


----------



## Flamme (Dec 30, 2012)

Im pretty much the same. No pretending. Im an ounce more brash online though


----------



## amfortas (Jun 15, 2011)

Online, I'm a total *******. Much nicer than in real life.


----------



## Phil loves classical (Feb 8, 2017)

I have a habit of turning off people that are speaking to me in person, when my mind wanders, and sometimes have to pretend I'm listening. Here I can just not read long posts, or skim over to a few main points. Plus we're talking about Classical music which is more interesting to me than a lot of other stuff.


----------



## Ingélou (Feb 10, 2013)

Can we trust the results? Won't the devious people say that they're 'very very like' their online selves in real life?

Since I voted in 2015, my online self has become a bit warier.


----------



## Varick (Apr 30, 2014)

My "personality" is the same on and offline. However, I'm less apt to engage online especially when it comes to complex issues only because of time factor. Online is all typing, and although I'm a pretty fast typer, what takes 10 minutes to type can be said in about 45-60 seconds. I rarely have that kind of time online.

V


----------



## Chilham (Jun 18, 2020)

Online, I have more of a tendency to say what I think, and to express those thoughts using stronger language.


----------

