# A question of taste



## Manok (Aug 29, 2011)

I have noticed that if you ask anyone what their favorite music is the answer is always a general "I will listen to just about anything, but I can tell you that I don't listen to X music" Why don't people name a specific kind of music? I've always wondered that. I'm very up front about my favorite music being classical music, is it because people don't know what they like to listen to or don't really think about it that much or what? By the way if I have posted in the wrong part of the forum you can move the post to wherever it is needed.


----------



## Sid James (Feb 7, 2009)

Manok said:


> I have noticed that if you ask anyone what their favorite music is the answer is always a general "I will listen to just about anything, but I can tell you that I don't listen to X music"...


Yeah I've had that, and sometimes do it myself. I usually say I like classical & other things but not a lot of opera. If they ask me what opera I say I can handle most things but not much Wagner.

It's probably to boil things down. In a short conversation about these potentially more complicated things - it is our passion, right? - we have to keep it kind of to the point.



> ...
> Why don't people name a specific kind of music? I've always wondered that. I'm very up front about my favorite music being classical music, is it because people don't know what they like to listen to or don't really think about it that much or what? ...


If the conversation continues, I mention my favourite area of classical is chamber music. Some people like it, some don't. Same with classical in general. I try to steer the conversation towards things we have in common, if any. Usually there is something in common music wise. But if there's not, there's plenty of other topics to talk about...


----------



## Kopachris (May 31, 2010)

They don't know how to appreciate it--it hasn't "clicked" with them yet. In short, we don't like what we don't understand.

EDIT: Just realized I was answering the wrong question because I have no idea what the OP is talking about. Every time I've asked someone what they listen to and someone has asked me what I listen to, there's always been a specific answer.


----------



## Zauberberg (Feb 21, 2012)

Maybe because people don't like to be classified/judged after using a small phrase to describe their tastes. I've dedicated the whole life to different types of music and I'm uncomfortable trying to resume that experience onto an answer. I feel it's just not right.


----------



## science (Oct 14, 2010)

Personally, I just say, "Mostly classical and jazz" and that's enough. Usually there's a surprised reaction like, "You listen to that?" followed by curiosity.


----------



## Manok (Aug 29, 2011)

I've always been curious about this. All I really want when I ask someone about their favorite music is basically a general "I like rock" or whatever, people do give me strange looks when I say I listen to mostly classical and heavy metal though.


----------



## Sid James (Feb 7, 2009)

Manok said:


> I've always been curious about this. All I really want when I ask someone about their favorite music is basically a general "I like rock" or whatever, people do give me strange looks when I say I listen to mostly classical and heavy metal though.


It might be what people think is an odd combination - eg. classical plus heavy metal. So they can't put you conveniently in a box. I sometimes get that, but if someone wants to box you, that's their way of seeing things, it's got nothing to do with you, basically. I basically think all music is just that - music. Regardless of various boundaries, real or artificial or in-between. Some people do agree with me (incl. musicologists & other "experts"), others don't. That's life...


----------



## science (Oct 14, 2010)

I really don't mind being pegged, as long as it is done without condescension - in real life, as far as I can tell, it always is. I never detect any condescension anyway.


----------



## Polednice (Sep 13, 2009)

I think some people say it to avoid the fact that people are very often quick to judge your character and personality in accordance with your preferred genre. Saying "anything" disarms the questioner.


----------



## Sid James (Feb 7, 2009)

science said:


> I really don't mind being pegged, as long as it is done without condescension - in real life, as far as I can tell, it always is...


I agree, when getting to know a person, they will ask you all sorts of questions - eg. in a longer conversation about music. Some of it can come across as being judging, but really they may be kind of trying to understand where you come from, etc. Fact is, I listen to things like the variety I do because even though I do like say Beethoven or Schoenberg, I don't want to listen to just them all the time. So, I explain this in a natural way to the person, they understand. Communication is a two way street. Most people get this, I think.



> ...I never detect any condescension anyway.


WEll I try to steer the conversation, as I said, to more positive ground, if there's room for that. Try not to tap into any negative vibes coming out, if possible.


----------



## PetrB (Feb 28, 2012)

In general parlance, I think a couple of things are in operation.

How do you know how much or how little the person asking knows of music (any genre)? Better to be general and a bit vague than overwhelm - a basic casual conversational gear - and wait and see how in detail you both want to get into it.

Second (rarer) So as to not inadvertently offend. "I listen to about everything, but can't stand that [email protected]#$%*ed Country Music"... then you see the other persons face crumple, hurt, because country music is their first love. (Social caution / consideration / a sort of editing.)

I'm told I am near infamous for not caring much for almost all mid to late romantic music: I could build up a list of non-qualifications why I think it is all very much off the mark, but they are around "taste" -- even sloppier, that dripping with ectoplasm slime difficult area 'aesthetics' -- and of what, over many years, I've come to realize is an underlying preference for 'classicist' music, whether that is Chopin (romantic exception because of the classicism) or Stravinsky, Rameau, Debussy, Schubert, etc. A classicist sensibility, regardless of which era, is for me a marked preference, and I just have less interest in the other, while - this took a while too - being able to easily recognize and say that a lot I don't care for At All is also 'great music.'


----------



## Sid James (Feb 7, 2009)

PetrB said:


> ...
> Second (rarer) So as to not inadvertently offend. "I listen to about everything, but can't stand that [email protected]#$%*ed Country Music"... then you see the other persons face crumple, hurt, because country music is their first love. (Social caution / consideration / a sort of editing.)...


I agree that it's wise to say what you're saying with respect, esp. if it's with a person you hardly know. At the same time, I don't shy away from expressing opinions. I've told musicians here, when meeting them, that I dislike certain contemporary composers who I think do rehash. I've gotten mixed reactions, some agree, some don't. But the conversation has always continued. There is respect there, that's the main thing. I don't shy away saying my thoughts of Wagner, often being more extreme than on this forum, where I often hold back...


----------



## StlukesguildOhio (Dec 25, 2006)

I tend to be quite open about what I like. I'll simply tell the person, "I listen to a broad array of music: classical, opera, jazz, blues, some rock and pop, traditional bluegrass and country, some folk, and some non-Western music." If they press the issue and ask what I listen to the most I'll admit that the vast majority of my time listening is spent with classical music followed by jazz... with all the other genres following behind. Personally I don't care if I get a weird look. Hell, I already have to admit that I'm an artist. That alone is certain to lead them to look at me askance.


----------



## Taneyev (Jan 19, 2009)

I never ask someone what kind of music she/he listen to. And nobody ask me. That's confortable. It's a private thing that I don't want to share or discuss with others.


----------



## science (Oct 14, 2010)

StlukesguildOhio said:


> look at me askance.


I look at you so askance it hurts my neck. There is only one solution: first, just so I can be sure you're not listening to any weird music, you send me your classical music in the mail. I'll pay for shipping, because _this is for your own good_ and I care about you deeply. Second, you get a real job.

Let's start with #1, see how it goes, and when my neck has made sufficient improvement we can move on to #2.

(Lord knows I'm likely to get warned for this - so just in case, let me make it absolutely clear that I'm just joking! I never look at online personalities askance - not even Polednice!)


----------



## Manok (Aug 29, 2011)

When I ask, I try not to be judgmental, I am always curious, especially if someone has interesting, or even what some call weird.


----------



## Sequentia (Nov 23, 2011)

Sid James said:


> musicologists & other "experts"


Why do you feel the need to insult musicologists? Because you have no idea what they do? Just curious, have you ever read a writing by Gevaert, Schenker, Reti, Tovey, Rosen, or Riemann?


----------



## samurai (Apr 22, 2011)

@ Sequentia, I don't think Sid is being "insulting" in the least; he is just stating what he thinks is the general consensus among musicologists vis a vis this subject.


----------



## PetrB (Feb 28, 2012)

Sid James said:


> I agree that it's wise to say what you're saying with respect, esp. if it's with a person you hardly know. At the same time, I don't shy away from expressing opinions. I've told musicians here, when meeting them, that I dislike certain contemporary composers who I think do rehash. I've gotten mixed reactions, some agree, some don't. But the conversation has always continued. There is respect there, that's the main thing. I don't shy away saying my thoughts of Wagner, often being more extreme than on this forum, where I often hold back...


In the context of a forum specified to classical music, I would think even the neophyte knows to expect clear statements of a strong opinion around taste. I was thinking of those more than many times in general social settings where it comes out after being asked "what do you do," -- the answer being, "I'm a professional musician," -- and the immediate following return being a gush-spate about -- hearing Engelbert Humperdinck (the namesake 2nd) perform live in Las Vegas, which is accompanied by a welling of emotion and tears -- and then realizing for that couple it had been a peak experience in their lives. It took me a bit of still youthful years - post conservatory and working - to mature enough to curb my reaction and completely bash what I deem as trash, realizing 1.) they were not really interested in What Kind Of Music I did or my musical tastes, but assumed their music IS all music. 2.) To denigrate, or even give a hint of my distaste for 'their kind of thing,' was beyond rude; it would have been hurtful and cruel.

Of course, when telling people of the music you like they then joke about and comment, 'How can you tell when the orchestra is done tuning up and the music begins." (Yuk .Yuk . Yawn.) is an experience commonly had many times over by many a professional classical musician. The imbalance of applied graciousness apart, you just deal with it, ignore it or make a deflecting pleasant comment. Later, at home you may contemplate, if you wish, why so many in the society around you seem to think you are from another planet, and dwell on the literal alienation that makes you feel.

The still too common fact that amid a knowledgeable community of musicians and non-professional devotees you are in a minority if you are not concentrating on music 120 years old or older is enough to generate the same alienation effect. Lol.


----------



## HarpsichordConcerto (Jan 1, 2010)

HarpsichordConcerto: "I prefer listening to classical music, including opera".

HC's acquaintance: "What?! You're such an old farty geezer".

That often sums it up.


----------



## violadude (May 2, 2011)

Some of it probably has to do with someone who has a passion for a particular style or styles of music being able to divide the genre into a million sub-genres that specifically define their tastes, so it is easier to just say what they don't like.


----------



## Ukko (Jun 4, 2010)

I have had to shoot only one person who denigrated my interest in classical music. Word gets around.


----------



## superhorn (Mar 23, 2010)

There's no particular kind of classical music I don't like to listen to. I judge works on their individual merits, not based on the genre. I enjoy orchestral music, chamber, opera, choral, solo piano works, you name it.


----------

