# How to Storm the Castle?



## Klassic (Dec 19, 2015)

You are before a castle with your legions, you have to rush in to save the music of Beethoven from total destruction, eradication from the earth. There just so happens to be a PA System hookup that will blast epic sound from the heavens. You get to choose one piece of music to play while your legions storm the castle. What piece of music do you choose?


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## MarkW (Feb 16, 2015)

The Ride of the Valkyries


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## Harold in Columbia (Jan 10, 2016)

The hailstone chorus by Handel - war music by a respected and sometimes successful businessman, working in the world's newly preeminent empire (so, pretty much the ideal scenario for self-confident bloodthirstiness), written for public performance (so, none of courtly restraint of the previous empire's bard, Lully).

Definitely not the "Ride of the Valkyries" by Wagner - posturing by a Romantic (therefore necessarily introverted) itinerant political refugee from the international laughing stock that was pre-Bismarck Germany.


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## Triplets (Sep 4, 2014)

The Hokey Pokey, because that's what it's all about


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## Richard8655 (Feb 19, 2016)

Next incisive poll after this: What music do you listen to during your WC visit? I say 1812 Overture.


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## EarthBoundRules (Sep 25, 2011)

The Tuba Mirum from Berlioz' _Grande Messe des Morts_. Just listen to those timpanis!


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## Cosmos (Jun 28, 2013)

Haha this is a fun thread.

I love the introduction to Bortkiewicz's second piano concerto


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## Marschallin Blair (Jan 23, 2014)

Miklos Rozsa: _Theme, Variations, and Finale_















Howard Shore, "The Battle of the Hornburg" from _The Two Towers_















John Foulds: "The Mantra of Will" from _Avatara_


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## Chordalrock (Jan 21, 2014)

Ligeti's "Lontano". As far as I'm concerned, storming castles is creepy business and should be combined with creepy music. Anything else would be grotesque.


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## Guest (Mar 15, 2016)

Obviously I would blast Atonalist propaganda from a ring of loudspeakers and watch as my foes turn into helpless sheep.


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## dgee (Sep 26, 2013)

nathanb said:


> Obviously I would blast Atonalist propaganda from a ring of loudspeakers and watch as my foes turn into helpless sheep.


Or just ATONAL MUSIC which would FRIGTHEN the enemy and HURT their ears and give them HEADACHES!!!! LOLOLOLOL


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## Guest (Mar 15, 2016)

dgee said:


> Or just ATONAL MUSIC which would FRIGTHEN the enemy and HURT their ears and give them HEADACHES!!!! LOLOLOLOL


Don't joke man, this thing happens more often than you think. Guy listens to Schoenberg, five years later, boom, herpes.


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## Marschallin Blair (Jan 23, 2014)

*


nathanb said:



Obviously I would blast Atonalist propaganda from a ring of loudspeakers and watch as my foes turn into helpless sheep.

Click to expand...

*









Okay, I'll put on my war paint for the sport of it. :angel:

- But do you really think Schoenberg's Von Schlieffen Plan would stand a fighting chance against the Marschallin's legions?

Exhorder, "Exhorder"






Abbath, "To War"






Immortal, "Hordes to War"


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## Badinerie (May 3, 2008)

Send in the "Devils in Skirts" to the tune of Offenbach's "Infernal Galop"


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## Marschallin Blair (Jan 23, 2014)

*


Badinerie said:



Send in the "Devils in Skirts" to the tune of Offenbach's "Infernal Galop"

Click to expand...

*


Badinerie said:


>












You can try to take that pike wall, but there's no guarantee what's going to happen though.

<Musical interlude for storming _Asgård_ >


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## violadude (May 2, 2011)

Some more TC thread ideas:

Music to make sandwiches by
Soundtrack to accompany your morning poo
Best "stuck in traffic" music
How well does classical music go with grocery store shenanigans?
Oops, I broke my back and am in the ambulance. Any music suggestions for the drive to the ER?
Music to accompany things I will never do in real life, just in case. Any suggestions?


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## Guest (Mar 15, 2016)

violadude said:


> Some more TC thread ideas:
> 
> Music to make sandwiches by
> Soundtrack to accompany your morning poo
> ...


Kinda makes you miss Albert, doesn't it?


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## millionrainbows (Jun 23, 2012)

"Onward Christian Soldiers"


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## Weston (Jul 11, 2008)

If my aim was to rally the troops, why not music from the man himself? The Scherzo from Beethoven's 3rd symphony is pretty good castle stormin' music, if a bit lighthearted.

If on the other hand my aim is to demoralize, Iommi's Iron Man or perhaps some down-tuned stoner rock from Electric Wizard might do the trick.


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## motoboy (May 19, 2008)

Overture to the Flying Dutchman.


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## Boldertism (May 21, 2015)

The fourth movement of Mozart's 39th Symphony, of course.


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## clavichorder (May 2, 2011)

Playing music to inspire troops while storming a castle contains endangered music? Ramstein.


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## ArtMusic (Jan 5, 2013)

Fireworks music grand overture (1st movement) by the great George Frideric Handel.


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## Pugg (Aug 8, 2014)

Badinerie said:


> Send in the "Devils in Skirts" to the tune of Offenbach's "Infernal Galop"


Your sense of humour is priceless, and so original :tiphat:


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## Animal the Drummer (Nov 14, 2015)

Anything by James Blunt. The defenders would be begging for mercy by the third bar.


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## Nereffid (Feb 6, 2013)

Something by Satie.

_C'est magnifique, mais ce n'est pas la guerre._


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## Dawood (Oct 11, 2015)

This:


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## Klassic (Dec 19, 2015)

MarkW said:


> The Ride of the Valkyries


So far as I can tell this is the correct answer.


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## Alydon (May 16, 2012)

I think I would cunningly send in a double agent into the castle and then for them to download if the music was in recorded form, or photograph all the Beethoven scores and then sneak back to my lines. This way you save Beethoven's music for evermore and also save your army to fight another day, maybe if Mozart's music was in peril.


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## Oscarf (Dec 13, 2014)

+1 for the Dies Irae from Verdi`s Requiem, though I am surprised nobody has mentioned Mars from The Planets


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

L'isle joyeuse by Debussy. The sounds would seem so strange to the aggressors, that it would completely explode their minds.


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## aimee (Nov 7, 2013)

The sounds of thunder and lightning through incessant timpani rolls and cymbal crashes from 
*Strauss' Thunder and Lightning Polka Schnell* piece might be another good candidate.


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## Becca (Feb 5, 2015)

Beethoven's _Wellington's Victory_


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## Metairie Road (Apr 30, 2014)

Castles are a good news/bad news proposition - ask any King next time you meet one.

Certainly a castle is a very strong defensive position, an invulnerable defensive position in most cases, unless the attackers have unlimited resources and manpower.

The bad news is that a castle is very vulnerable to 'siege'. Historically the most common tactic used in dealing with a castle was the 'SIEGE'. The attackers merely have to wait (about three months) for the castle's occupants to go crazy and start drinking their own urine and eating each other. Easy.

How about some SIEGE music?


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## Klassic (Dec 19, 2015)

Metairie Road said:


> Castles are a good news/bad news proposition - ask any King next time you meet one.
> 
> Certainly a castle is a very strong defensive position, an invulnerable defensive position in most cases, unless the attackers have unlimited resources and manpower.
> 
> The bad news is that a castle is very vulnerable to 'siege'. Historically the most common tactic used in dealing with a castle was the 'SIEGE'. The attackers merely have to wait (about three months) for the castle's occupants to go crazy and start drinking their own urine and eating each other. Easy.


I know, I know, but remember Beethoven's music is trapped inside and it is about to be annihilated, so pick your tune.


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## Metairie Road (Apr 30, 2014)

*Klassic*, you're right, I beg your pardon. By the time I'd finished my response I'd lost sight of the question.

Anyway, castle storming music -

Most of the usual suspects have been mentioned already, so I'll go with -

*Respighi - 'The Appian Way' from The Pines Of Rome.*

*Ravel orchestration of The Hut on Fowl's Legs/The Great Gate of Kiev by Mussorgsky.*

*The William Tell Overture.*

It takes a big orchestra to storm a castle.

Best wishes
Metairie Road


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