# Burnout, any ways to deal with it?



## cellogrl (Apr 4, 2014)

I'm a 17 year old cellist currently applying for conservatories. Since about two years ago, I haven't been enjoying cello as much. I've had some problems with panic attack-like feelings on stage, and I'm afraid they'll eventually prevent me from continuing. I do work myself up about lessons and performances. I've also done so much music since I was young that I haven't really had a chance to to anything else. I just don't like it the way I used to anymore. It's really sad for me, because it's basically all I know and I have difficulties in school (possible learning disability) so I feel sort of trapped. I'm not good at academic work or test taking, so I feel like I can't go into anything else. I think I have a pretty good personality, and I'm very compassionate and sensitive, maybe too much. I was thinking about doing social work. But my parents really want me to do music. I'm not sure what to do :/


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## scratchgolf (Nov 15, 2013)

I'm not a musician but I understand burnout. Sometimes a short break can allow you to sort out your priorities. This may not be possible in your situation but it can be beneficial. It seems you've been playing for some time but it's difficult to pour time and effort into something you're not passionate about. I'm sorry I can't offer you more than that but consider the break. Prolonged absence makes the heart grow fond but a short break can assist with assessing wants and needs. I hope you work through your struggles.


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## Woodduck (Mar 17, 2014)

It's possible to be too focused on one aspect of life. People vary in this: some of us are born monomaniacs and can channel virtually all our time and energy into a single pursuit for years or a lifetime. Others need to diversify, to cultivate various interests and use various of their faculties, moving back and forth between interests. And this can change over time. It could be dismaying for an aspiring performer to find that as she grows older she needs to satisfy parts of herself that had been neglected during years of seven-hour- per-day piano practice or daily dance lessons. But my suspicion is that this is really quite common, and is a partial explanation of why most music students do not become performers of note, even if they continue to play. I must apologize if this is not an encouraging suggestion! But at seventeen you are still young and learning about yourself and what you want and need in life. Practical or not, I would second scratchgolf's suggestion of a mental vacation, preferably spent doing anything else you love to do. Life could begin to look different in unexpected ways - perhaps pleasingly, perhaps not, but at least with less of a sense of being stuck. Remember: it's your life, and there's nothing you are obligated to do with it.


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## david johnson (Jun 25, 2007)

burnout often comes when you expect x from y and y isn't designed to provide that. as you work harder on x you get diminishing returns and it can become a frustrating circle. take some months and perform at retirement homes, churches, etc. let people enjoy your talents. set up shop by a salvation army kettle and play Christmas tunes. see how you feel a few weeks from now. get away from the practice room and entertain others.


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## shangoyal (Sep 22, 2013)

You are still young, so you have time on your side. Take a break and do something else that you enjoy, but try to be productive. The moment of success does not come very often, but it will come one day. Some day, if you keep practising music, the other things like nervousness will take care of themselves.


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## ComposerOfAvantGarde (Dec 2, 2011)

I'm the same age and have had quite similar experiences regarding classical guitar.....

One thing that helped me really get back _into_ playing my instrument was research for research's sake. When I was put off by playing the guitar I would go online and read about guitarists, composers for the guitar, repertoire, interpretation, history and so on and so on and I was able to come back to really enjoying playing my instrument but coming at it from a different angle. I would never suggest taking a break from music entirely, but perhaps shifting focus to something a little less nerve-wracking in music may safely guide you back to playing your instrument with more passion.

Good luck with everything!


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## Triplets (Sep 4, 2014)

I am not sure if this is burnout or Panic Attacks and a Generalized Anxiey Disorder. It sounds like you might benefit from Counseling, especially as you may have some issues with your Parents that you need to work through. Try asking your Parents if you can see a Counselor, and perhaps get tested for Learning Disability as well. A Career Counselor may also be a resource to explore.
If your Parents are resistant to all of the above, try approaching the Social Worker at your school.


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## Marschallin Blair (Jan 23, 2014)

Woodduck said:


> It's possible to be too focused on one aspect of life. People vary in this: some of us are born monomaniacs and can channel virtually all our time and energy into a single pursuit for years or a lifetime. Others need to diversify, to cultivate various interests and use various of their faculties, moving back and forth between interests. And this can change over time. It could be dismaying for an aspiring performer to find that as she grows older she needs to satisfy parts of herself that had been neglected during years of seven-hour- per-day piano practice or daily dance lessons. But my suspicion is that this is really quite common, and is a partial explanation of why most music students do not become performers of note, even if they continue to play. I must apologize if this is not an encouraging suggestion! But at seventeen you are still young and learning about yourself and what you want and need in life. Practical or not, I would second scratchgolf's suggestion of a mental vacation, preferably spent doing anything else you love to do. Life could begin to look different in unexpected ways - perhaps pleasingly, perhaps not, but at least with less of a sense of being stuck. Remember: it's your life, and there's nothing you are obligated to do with it.


That's so _selfish_. . .

. . . I _love _it. _;D_


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

I wouldn't take ANY advice offered by amateurs on a website to help you *directly* solve such a potentially serious problem.

I would get professional help: from a counselor, psychologist or psychiatrist. See your MD for a recommendation if necessary.


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## scratchgolf (Nov 15, 2013)

hpowders said:


> I wouldn't take ANY advice offered by amateurs on a website to help you *directly* solve such a potentially serious problem.


Followed by..........advice



hpowders said:


> I would get professional help: from a councillor, psychologist or psychiatrist. See your MD for a recommendation if necessary.


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## StevenOBrien (Jun 27, 2011)

Do other things for a few months and see if you want to come back to it. You're only 17, and you can always apply again next year when you're more certain about what you want to do. Have you sat down and talked to your parents about this?

I was in the opposite situation at 17, I was being pushed to go to college to do computer science (which was what I had done for most of my life up until that point) but wanted to do music. After bottling it up and having a pretty bad break down over it, I agreed with my parents to take a year off to decide what I wanted to do. Fast forward a few years, and I'm making a reasonable living working as a composer.


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## Dustin (Mar 30, 2012)

I pretty much agree with what everyone else is saying. Try to understand that you are absolutely not obligated to do anything with your life and that should help ease any pressure. Also, taking a short break from playing and trying some other things for a while could be really good for you. Once you are doing other things, and at the same time understanding you are not obligated to go back to music, you could possibly gain a renewed interest in playing.


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## julianoq (Jan 29, 2013)

Meditation may help you with panic-attacks and general anxiety when playing. I've being doing it for some time and I get much more pleasure playing piano or bass after learning how to be mindful of the experience. I do vipassana 20 minutes a day, but it is important to me to apply the principles also when playing.

26 Scientifically Proven Benefits of Meditation

Guided Vipassana Meditation with Tara Brach

Mindfulness in Plain English


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## Albert7 (Nov 16, 2014)

julianoq said:


> Meditation may help you with panic-attacks and general anxiety when playing. I've being doing it for some time and I get much more pleasure playing piano or bass after learning how to be mindful of the experience. I do vipassana 20 minutes a day, but it is important to me to apply the principles also when playing.
> 
> 26 Scientifically Proven Benefits of Meditation
> 
> ...


I agree with doing meditation. It really helps to keep one focused on the essentials of life indeed. Zen meditation is pretty awesome if you are into that type of thing.


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## HaydnBearstheClock (Jul 6, 2013)

Don't give up on yourself, that's the most important thing. If you're not enjoying the cello playing, then try looking for what other interests or abilities you have - are you good at languages, do you like science or visual arts? Tap into another area that interests you. It's a phase - you'll get better once you find a new orientation. I wish you success.


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## GreenMamba (Oct 14, 2012)

I suspect this is part of the problem with high competition skills, such as playing a musical instrument. To some extent, it comes down to who can endure it the most. The person who'll give over 90% of his childhood has an advantage over the one who'll only give over 75%. 

I know this isn't helpful, although I will say if you want to do something else in life:

1) You certainly aren't too old to try something else. "Normal" careers are extremely forgiving this way. 
2) You'll always have music as a hobby or sideline. It's not like becoming a licensed CPA and then realizing you don't want to be an accountant. What are you going to do with those skills?


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## Morimur (Jan 23, 2014)

cellogrl said:


> I'm a 17 year old cellist currently applying for conservatories. Since about two years ago, I haven't been enjoying cello as much. I've had some problems with panic attack-like feelings on stage, and I'm afraid they'll eventually prevent me from continuing. I do work myself up about lessons and performances. I've also done so much music since I was young that I haven't really had a chance to to anything else. I just don't like it the way I used to anymore. It's really sad for me, because it's basically all I know and I have difficulties in school (possible learning disability) so I feel sort of trapped. I'm not good at academic work or test taking, so I feel like I can't go into anything else. I think I have a pretty good personality, and I'm very compassionate and sensitive, maybe too much. I was thinking about doing social work. But my parents really want me to do music. I'm not sure what to do :/


Watch Charlie Murphy's True Hollywood Story: Rick James -- never fails to fix all my problems.


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## Blake (Nov 6, 2013)

It just sounds like you're going through the ebb and flow of life. Everyone deals with this one way or the other... even many of the greatest musicians of all time have questioned themselves. I wouldn't over-blow the issue seeking psychiatry so early when this really seems like a natural phenomenon. Your mind is telling you that it wants a break from constant fixation. Learn to detach yourself a bit and dismiss this idea that everything has such dire consequences.


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## Lunasong (Mar 15, 2011)

There's two things that really struck me about your statement.
1. This has been going on for TWO years! and... 
2. that your parents really want you to do music.

I think your anxiety has to do with your focus on one thing to the apparent exclusion of "anything else." More balance will help your perspective and enjoyment. Don't think that, at this point in your life, your concentration on music is a "sunk cost" that prevents you from choosing another direction. And definitely, as GreenMamba points out, there's always room for a good cellist in a community orchestra.
As for your parents, are they really aware how difficult it is to make a living at music? How many jobs you'll have to cobble together just to make ends meet? How the opportunities keep going to those who are already at the top (I'm looking at YOU, principals...) whilst those at the lower desks struggle just to get by when musically, they were at the top of their class in every performance group/school they'd been up to this point? I couldn't agree more than what's in this post. I'm wondering what's motivating your parents to choose this course for you.


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## millionrainbows (Jun 23, 2012)

cellogrl said:


> I'm a 17 year old cellist currently applying for conservatories. Since about two years ago, I haven't been enjoying cello as much. I've had some problems with panic attack-like feelings on stage, and I'm afraid they'll eventually prevent me from continuing. I do work myself up about lessons and performances. I've also done so much music since I was young that I haven't really had a chance to to anything else. I just don't like it the way I used to anymore. It's really sad for me, because it's basically all I know and I have difficulties in school (possible learning disability) so I feel sort of trapped. I'm not good at academic work or test taking, so I feel like I can't go into anything else. I think I have a pretty good personality, and I'm very compassionate and sensitive, maybe too much. I was thinking about doing social work. But my parents really want me to do music. I'm not sure what to do :/


Follow your soul; follow whatever gets you to your true passion and soul. Sometimes this is at odds with everything, with what those around us want, or what is "PROPER." But tune in to your soul. Go to the Salvation Army and donate some clothes, and look around. Talk to a homeless person that you would othewise ignore; give them a dollar, and let them know you are not afraid, and smile. If this turns you on, do it.


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## Blake (Nov 6, 2013)

... Or, you can do as I used to - drink plenty of alcohol till you forget your current problems by creating new ones. 


Oh, I'm kidding. In an honest sort of way.


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## papsrus (Oct 7, 2014)

cellogrl said:


> I'm a 17 year old cellist currently applying for conservatories. Since about two years ago, I haven't been enjoying cello as much. I've had some problems with panic attack-like feelings on stage, and I'm afraid they'll eventually prevent me from continuing. I do work myself up about lessons and performances. I've also done so much music since I was young that I haven't really had a chance to to anything else. I just don't like it the way I used to anymore. It's really sad for me, because it's basically all I know and I have difficulties in school (possible learning disability) so I feel sort of trapped. I'm not good at academic work or test taking, so I feel like I can't go into anything else. I think I have a pretty good personality, and I'm very compassionate and sensitive, maybe too much. I was thinking about doing social work. But my parents really want me to do music. I'm not sure what to do :/


There are many kids your age (I'm sure you know) who have no idea what they want to do with their lives and can't be bothered to think about it. They'd rather plug into a video game and avoid dealing with the real world.

You are thinking about the future, and that's half the battle. The fact that you have the discipline / commitment to master a musical instrument is a great accomplishment. But it doesn't necessarily mean that's all that defines who you are, and what your potential is. A cello-playing social worker would be a great thing!

In short, it sounds like you've already accomplished a great deal at a young age and are thinking about the future in a serious way. And actually thinking about the future and trying to envision where you want to go, that's half the battle.

Life is a wonderful journey and it's all ahead of you. You don't have to figure everything out right now. Take a deep breath and think about what you enjoy, and take it slow and steady, because whatever the future holds, it will take time to get there.


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