# Adagio from "Adagio Pathetique and Rondo for Flute and Piano"



## dzc4627 (Apr 23, 2015)

This is the first movement in my piece "Adagio Pathetique and Rondo for Flute and Piano"

I'd like to give a big thanks to Jenny Lehtonen (you may know her as her username Humonluihluitu or something) !! She is the flutist and she does so well in this. Just as a disclaimer, the pianists makes some mistakes from the original score which I'll attach, so if you follow along, just keep that in mind. The mistakes are probably primarily a result of my amateur piano writing and my lack of emphasis on certain accidentals or lack thereof.






Score: 
View attachment Adagio Pathetique for Flute and Piano (Adagio) - Full Score (3).pdf


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## Vasks (Dec 9, 2013)

dzc4627 said:


> This is the first movement in my piece "Adagio Pathetique and Rondo for Flute and Piano"
> 
> I'd like to give a big thanks to Jenny Lehtonen (you may know her as her username Humonluihluitu or something) !! She is the flutist and she does so well in this. Just as a disclaimer, the pianists makes some mistakes from the original score which I'll attach, so if you follow along, just keep that in mind. The mistakes are probably primarily a result of my amateur piano writing and my lack of emphasis on certain accidentals or lack thereof.


Jenny stayed very true to your markings, so indeed you should be pleased. As to your piano writing, you are very fortunate that the pianist was willing to deal with what you notated (notice I did not say what you wrote because what you wrote is quite playable; you seem to be unwilling to utilize the treble clef  actually I think you were afraid to use the treble clef because so many of the right hand notes are below middle C, but to solve that you write the upper staff in the bass clef) I say "fortunate" because others may look at it and say no way they're willing to cope.

You seem to be a bit too pedantic when it comes to dynamic marking changes (cresc. on a single 8th note? C'mon, man!). I also hope you will examine the progression killing habit of cadencing on a chord and then repeating that same chord right afterward. Keep the music flowing; move on. One more critique is to say you need to be a little less square with your rhythms. Consider a few syncopated places. I do sense that your inherent musicianship is good, so work on those weaknesses.


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## Pianistikboy (Mar 18, 2017)

Thanks for sharing your work that is fresh and beautiful ! Good that you can have your music played.


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## dzc4627 (Apr 23, 2015)

Vasks said:


> Jenny stayed very true to your markings, so indeed you should be pleased. As to your piano writing, you are very fortunate that the pianist was willing to deal with what you notated (notice I did not say what you wrote because what you wrote is quite playable; you seem to be unwilling to utilize the treble clef  actually I think you were afraid to use the treble clef because so many of the right hand notes are below middle C, but to solve that you write the upper staff in the bass clef) I say "fortunate" because others may look at it and say no way they're willing to cope.
> 
> You seem to be a bit too pedantic when it comes to dynamic marking changes (cresc. on a single 8th note? C'mon, man!). I also hope you will examine the progression killing habit of cadencing on a chord and then repeating that same chord right afterward. Keep the music flowing; move on. One more critique is to say you need to be a little less square with your rhythms. Consider a few syncopated places. I do sense that your inherent musicianship is good, so work on those weaknesses.


Could you elaborate on the cadence point? The rhythmic critique is valid, however the simplicity was intentional stylistically. I definitely don't see a problem with adding some syncopation actually, will do.

Thank you for your comment! And do believe me, my piano writing is improving each time a friend says "My accompanist won't be able to read that." :tiphat:


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## Vasks (Dec 9, 2013)

Cadence on a half note G# minor chord (end of m. 13). The next measure (m.14) starts a new phrase with another G# minor chord

Cadence on B major chord (m.101). Extended in m.102. Then piano starts a phrase at beginning of m. 103 on the same B major chord.



dzc4627 said:


> The rhythmic critique is valid, however the simplicity was intentional stylistically.


I'm glad you'll think about it more, but too many square-cut rhythms is boring to both the listener and a good musician. So I can't accept any composer being "intentionally" simple unless it's for inexperienced young players.

I have one more question regarding the score I'm looking at: Is this your actual performance score? If so, it has a ton of redundant accidentals that no performer should have to contend with.


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## dzc4627 (Apr 23, 2015)

Vasks said:


> Cadence on a half note G# minor chord (end of m. 13). The next measure (m.14) starts a new phrase with another G# minor chord
> 
> Cadence on B major chord (m.101). Extended in m.102. Then piano starts a phrase at beginning of m. 103 on the same B major chord.
> 
> ...


Thanks for the elaboration. I totally agree and concede on the rhythm point.

This is the score of which the piece was performed. If you might be so kind to give me a few general tips and rules regarding accidentals that might make the score more legible, I'd greatly appreciate it.

I had a very constant dialogue with the flutist regarding ways I could make it better for her but more specifically the pianist, however, obviously there is a ton that I missed and messed up on. This is without a doubt due to my lack of rooting in formal compositional technique. This is however no excuse to put a performer through torture, which is why I will be attending San Francisco Conservatory of Music this coming fall, so that I will surely learn to communicate my ideas with more restraint, neatness, and structural integrity. Thanks again for the due criticism.


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## Vasks (Dec 9, 2013)

Congrats on going to a fine school like the San Fran Conservatory! A few years ago a graduate student there played one of my published pieces on a recital. You are sure to learn a ton of things once you're there. And it's nice to see that you want to improve. So many posters here come on and say they want input, but not really. All they want is praise and if you dare criticize anything they become ultra-defensive.

Now about redundant accidentals. Since there are a good number of them, I can only point out the first couple of instances; then it's up to you to find & correct the others. And in all instances I am looking at the piano part.

mm.23 & 52 - on beat 1 you have octave F#'s in the left hand. On beat 2 you use another F# accidental in the left hand. That's redundant. (On a side note, on the same measure's second beat you have a D-natural followed by a D# on beat 3. The D-natural while probably there because there was a D# in the previous measure, is unnecessary because the D# on beat 3 tells us that beat two was a D-natural. Remember use accidentals wisely. Sometimes we have to use a courtesy accidental to avoid confusion, but this one is an example where there is no confusion.)

That's all until m.77. Oh dear!! I fear copy & paste is the culprit. Every single 8th note after the first one, repeats the accidentals F# & C# of lowest part. Now 78 is the same problem & so too m. 80. And as you look beyond those measures you'll see more.


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