# Anton: Chapter 19



## Huilunsoittaja (Apr 6, 2010)

Anton contrived the perfect plan. In his opinion.
He asked his now former pupil and present young colleague Sergei Vasilievich to do a concert with him. It would feature the premiere of his own Suite for 2 Pianos, and anything Sergei Vasilievich had been working one. Of course, he was delighted at the opportunity, because Sergei Vasilievich had something special up his sleeve for Anton, a sort of gift in thanks for the years they worked together.
It was in July, near Anton's own birthday, when they planned the concert. It would of course feature other composers and works, but they would be together. Sergei Vasilievich wouldn't play the 2nd piano part with Anton, but instead one of Anton's dear friends and colleague of the Conservatory volunteered. Sergei would play his own works alone. This concert was arranged to be in the chamber Hall of the Conservatory, and signs were put up all around.
Anton finally made his personal move. 2 weeks before the concert, going to Katerina's doorstep one evening, without knocking, he put an envelope at the foot of the door, and then left.
Inside were 2 tickets for his premiere, and no other message. Not even Katerina's name was written on it, to be a mark of suspicion.

A full crowd came to the concert, to Anton's delight. He had become quite popular among a certain crowd because of his salon pieces. But nothing made him more happy than when he saw Katerina walk through the entrance into the hall.
He was sitting backstage, but had a view toward the entrance. Katerina came forward, ahead of her husband. She was wearing a dark blue dress with black edging, and her hat and gloves were black. Anton grinned involuntarily, but knew she couldn't see him from the shadows. Then he finally took a look at her husband.
He had an extremely grave, impressive face. He was very tall, with blonde hair and blue eyes, a typical German. He seemed reluctant at coming, perhaps it wasn't his favored method of diversion, but he followed Katerina nonetheless. Eventually, he kept her from going to far ahead of him, and grabbed her arm and pulled her to his side. Katerina frowned, but didn't respond. Instead, she began scanning her surroundings like a hawk. Looking for something. Someone.
For all of Anton's issues with extreme anxiety, he was a strange character because he had the heart of a performer nonetheless. He never got nervous anymore from performing or conducting, and even with Katerina there, he felt even more empowered, because of the love he could sense from her. Sometimes it seemed only Katerina and thoughts of her could cure his nervousness.
When the hour struck for the concert to begin, Sergei Vasilievich came on stage alone. He was greeted with polite applause, but really very few knew who he was. He thus began playing his newest and as-of-yet unpublished composition, his opus 3, still in the making: 3 Morceaux de fantaisie.
Anton looked at the program to see the names of the pieces. Under the label of the piece was a subtitle, "Dedicated to my former teacher and present mentor and friend, Anton Stepanovich."
"He dedicated this to me?" he thought with awe. "How thoughtful of him!"
The 3 works were very good, but the 2nd was by far the best. After the concert, besides Anton's Suite, nobody could stop talking about Sergei Vasilievich's... prelude in C # minor.
A second composer, an earlier student on Anton, played a fantasy for piano, and then there was an intermission. Anton, Sergei Vasilievich, Sergei Ivanovich who had also come, and several others met together back stage to talk.
Sergei Ivanovich suddenly came close to Anton and whispered in his ear:
"Didn't you see Katerina here? How did she know?"
Anton turned his head for a second, he couldn't help noticing that Katerina had gotten up and inconspicuously started moving toward the back stage entrance, but never actually looked in.
"She would know such things. After all, her family is in the music business."
"Do you think she remembers you?"
Anton smiled. "Undoubtedly."
He turned and saw Katerina standing there on the edge of the room, looking in. Their eyes met.
Anton suddenly felt uneasy, and even sad.
"Do you want to talk?"
It hadn't occurred to him, but Anton thought it through. He then stepped out from back stage, and approached her. Sergei Ivanovich and the others watched the whole thing.
They said nothing to each other at first, but then Anton whispered to her.
"I'm being watched."
"So am I," she replied also in a whisper.
"So... make with the 'small talk'?"
"Very well," and speaking up with a more lively voice began saying, "Oh, what a great privilege I have to see you perform today Anton Stepanovich! I've bought some of your works, and enjoyed them."
"Why thank you, Katerina Karlovna. It's... been so long since we met. How have you been?"
"All is well," she smiled brightly, though Anton could tell she was just really good at faking her emotions. It was something she trained herself ever since she married and was being watched.
"Well, thank you for buying and appreciating my music. I'm glad you could come today."
"Yes, it is my pleasure! Good luck to you!" She curtsied and stepped away on her own, looking like it was the most casual conversation.
She was good.
Anton went back stage, to see all the rest watching him.
"Well," Sergei Ivanovich began, confused. "So you've gotten on better terms?"
"What do you mean? We've always been on great terms. You imply different terms then?"
"Yes," Sergei looked down at the ground.
"Ah, all is well," Anton smiled. "We've gone our own separate ways. Those days are past."
Suddenly that thought struck him.
It was an outright lie.
Sergei Ivanovich saw a sudden confusion come on Anton's face when he said that, but said nothing. Anton excused himself to get a drink, and left the group. Sergei Vasilievich watched everything that happened in silence, but he wasn't fully aware what was going on. He didn't know that much about Anton personally.
Finally the intermission was over, and Anton and his friend stepping on stage were welcomed with an applause. They both bowed, but Anton wished to make a comment to the audience.
"Thank you everyone for coming to this concert tonight. I assure you all that you will be well pleased. I want to speak a little bit about what is now my most recent composition, my 2nd suite for 2 pianos. I have subtitled this one, "Silhouettes" as I had the intention of creating emotional impressions of some certain characters you might find on a typical night in Moscow, perhaps in one of our great clubs. There is... the Scholar, the Coquette, the Pulcinella, the Dreamer, and the Dancer. In case you don't get out very much," Anton found Katerina in the seats immediately and stared her in the eyes, "I hope this will be a nice excursion."
Some in the audience chuckled at his choice of word. He smiled, and sat down at the piano closest to him. So began his suite.
I will take a moment to describe a little bit about Anton's own showmanship. He loved to be a showman. Not that he would take many "Lisztian" liberties, as it is called, with major arm or hand gestures, but his interpretations always showed an extreme sense of caprice and impulsiveness. His colleague and himself worked many hours to get his interpretation just right, but all tempo fluctuations and dynamic contrasts were synchronized to a t. If Anton had absorbed any influence from Piotr Ilyich, this intense passion for passion was one of the most obvious. Anton wasn't just a musician, he was a musical actor, which was one of the reasons he excelled in conducting too.
Anton had a personal moment when he got to the 4th movement, the Dreamer. In his little collection of character sketches, he composed this movement to represent himself. Whether or not anyone ought to know that, he didn't care, but he wanted Katerina to know. Although he couldn't get himself to look at her at any time during the piece, he finally found her watching him intently and sorrowfully from where she sat. They looked at each other only a moment, but it was enough in Anton's knowledge that she was meaning, "Yes, we will still hold on."
One more number followed, a great showpiece finale. As it ended in a flurry, the audience cheered in admiration, and many yelled bravo. Anton and his friend stood up, and bowed together, beaming.
As the concert was over, immediately a crowd came up to the stage to meet all the composers and musicians, giving congratulations. Katerina watched from a distance, and her husband was lecturing her about his disapproval of going to "popular salon concerts" as he called them. But she wasn't hearing, and was staring at Anton.
Finally, he notified her that they were leaving promptly, and again grabbed her by the arm to take her to his side. Striding out swiftly, Katerina gave Anton a pleading look which he saw, and he frowned.
She mouthed 2 words.
"Love you."
There would be no more meetings or conversation for the night. Perhaps the year.
Sergei Ivanovich couldn't leave the topic alone when they finally rid themselves of the crowd and it was just themselves.
"When was the last time you saw her?"
"At my opera's premiere."
"You mean...!" Sergei started.
"Yes, I met her. But I couldn't tell you then."
"What happened?"
"Nothing. We talked," Anton muttered reluctantly.
"Have you met her husband?"
"No, I haven't, nor do I want to."
"So you're still holding onto her then?"
"Ach, why are you so frank about such things?" Anton grimaced.
"It's true then?"
"It's not your business!" he snapped, and stormed off.
"But what if she's let go of you?"
Anton stopped walking.
"She won't," he said darkly, and then continued on.
He got another nervous attack again because of so many raging thoughts in his mind, and drank himself into oblivion alone in his home.


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