# Need feedback



## twodjsmusic (Jun 18, 2012)

Hey i need feedback on this song!  please!


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## myaskovsky2002 (Oct 3, 2010)

Ugh.

If you like it, that is the main thing


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## chee_zee (Aug 16, 2010)

its good but not great. takes too long for the bass drum to kick in. Not enough variation and change in the overall texture and soundscape in the intro. the timbre that comes in at 1:44 could be hinted at briefly in the intro. there seems to be no countermelody, in fact there really only seems to be one melody at all in the whole thing. 

then you get to 2:25 but the effect seems much too sudden, and then you leave this soundscape for an interlude with the harpsichord sounding thing too quickly. I would:

extend the bridge to the 2:25 section
make the 2:25 section longer before the interlude with the harpsichord timbre chimes in
hint at this 2:25 melody at some point in counterpoint over the 1:44 to 2:25 section
make the intro more interesting with some hints of timbres and melodies to come
improve bridging from section to section so that things seem to naturally go into another rather than forcefully

and then you MIGHT have a great tune. IMO, the melodies just aren't catchy enough for this to ever be a great tune, but I'd still take my advice just so you get better at the process in general. Then, having honed your technique, work out at least 4 melodies. Melody for section A as well as it's countermelody. Then melody for section B and it's countermelody. Make the melody for B able to be in some sort of counterpoint with at least the main melody of A, if not both that and the countermelody of A. More variation of timbres in the intro but don't drag out so long, it's not a progressive tune nor does it have much of a percussive buildup before there are much in the way of melodies like the intro to an extended version of a happy hardcore.

Take a look at slyder and plastikman for the progressive side of things if you would really like to hone that technique outside of the prog idiom. And just work on writing really catchy melodies that can somehow counterpoint with each other. Notice especially the transition effects that appear very briefly in slyder bridges, lasting mere seconds if that but greatly boosting suspense. look forward to more.


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