# Why Is It In The Movies?



## DaveM (Jun 29, 2015)

People make promises they can’t possibly be sure to keep. Fr’instance, “I promise to find your husband’s killer.”

People always find a parking place right in front of the restaurant or store they’re going to.

Try adding your own.


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## Krummhorn (Feb 18, 2007)

Always makes me laugh to hear tires squealing when they are racing on the sand at the beach.


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## Art Rock (Nov 28, 2009)

Battles between space ships, including sound effects. Duh.


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## Granate (Jun 25, 2016)

Lately I've been noticing script writers learned in the Gounod opera school of "promise me you'll do this". Yeah. I agree.

I don't watch films anymore except for a few of them in the cinema.


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## Merl (Jul 28, 2016)

Horror movies where people go downstairs in the middle of the night to investigate a strange sound (without putting the lights on or waking their partner up). Wouldn't happen. Plus I'd be holding a 9 iron.


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## Joe B (Aug 10, 2017)

I am always amazed at how people in movies wake up with their makeup and hair in perfect order.....styling!


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## elgar's ghost (Aug 8, 2010)

Many Latin American drug gang members seem to have pony tails and run around in full-length black leather trench coats even in summer. Yeah, sure...


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## Pat Fairlea (Dec 9, 2015)

Those soi-disant thrillers in which our hero has to defuse, dismantle or otherwise disenable a bomb as it counts down to detonation. After much dithering, desperation and perspiration, s/he succeeds and the clock stops at ... yes, 2 seconds. Never 3 or 5 or 15 seconds, any of which would be a damn close-run thing. Always 2 seconds. And I have yet to see such a movie in which the hero/ine unexpectedly fails and is blown to smithereens. 

And another thing, in those 'noises in the night' scenes, as the anxious householder creeps downstairs in the self-imposed dark, why do they never, ever trip over the cat?


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## Manxfeeder (Oct 19, 2010)

They always talk in complete sentences, and the people who listen to them always understand what they're saying.

What I'm used to is, "You need to fix the, you know, thing." "What?" "You know, the thing." "I didn't hear you."


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## Joe B (Aug 10, 2017)

elgars ghost said:


> Many Latin American drug gang members seem to have pony tails and run around in full-length black leather trench coats even in summer. Yeah, sure...


WOW! I didn't know Steven Segal was a Latin American drug/gang member.:lol:


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## elgar's ghost (Aug 8, 2010)

Joe B said:


> WOW! I didn't know Steven Segal was a Latin American drug/gang member.:lol:


I'd imagine REAL drug gang members could still act better than that prize oaf.


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## DaveM (Jun 29, 2015)

Couples in wild passion do the dirty deed on hard objects...like a table.


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## Manxfeeder (Oct 19, 2010)

DaveM said:


> Couples in wild passion do the dirty deed on hard objects...like a table.


And when they sweep off a desk to do the wild thing, they never get stabbed by a letter opener.


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## Gordontrek (Jun 22, 2012)

If you went to a Hispanic section of New York and yelled "Maria!" how many girls do you think are going to come to the window? Just one of those little things that bothered me about West Side Story, not to mention gangsters doing ballet. 

But as for more general things, and this is more touchy of a subject than I usually discuss so I might get some flack: I never understood why in action movies you always have to have a scowling, sexy lady who is somehow capable of beating up entire gangs of burly dudes all by herself. It's unrealistic enough even when it's a jacked-up muscle man doing it, but even more so when a woman with the body of a runway model does. I suppose you have to appease the PC culture by letting them take refuge in fiction with stuff that would never happen in real life.


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## DaveM (Jun 29, 2015)

One of the main characters gets shot in a shoulder, an arm or a leg and another character checks the wound and says, ‘Not to worry, it’s just a flesh wound!’ or ‘It’s nothing to worry about, the bullet went right through.’

Okay, a bullet has just torn through a combination of skin, muscles, ligaments and tendons and the character continues to use the limb, or even fight with it, as if nothing ever happened.


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## laurie (Jan 12, 2017)

Merl said:


> Horror movies where people go downstairs in the middle of the night to investigate a strange sound (without putting the lights on or waking their partner up). Wouldn't happen. Plus I'd be holding a 9 iron.


Yeah ~ in real life the teenaged babysitter would_ never_ go down into the basement, either 

Or how the (eventual) victims do everything (including undressing) in front of an open window at night, in full view of the creeper/shooter/ax-murderer watching from the bushes ~ _close your curtains!!_

And how you know exactly what's about to happen when someone has car trouble ~ on a dark, deserted road, of course. Says the hilarious comedian, Mitch Hedberg (rip, Mitch)  ...
_ "If I was a mechanic and someone called me and said their car would not start, I would say,
"Hey - maybe a killer is after you!""_ :lol:


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## Art Rock (Nov 28, 2009)

DaveM said:


> One of the main characters gets shot in a shoulder, an arm or a leg and another character checks the wound and says, 'Not to worry, it's just a flesh wound!' or 'It's nothing to worry about, the bullet went right through.'
> 
> Okay, a bullet has just torn through a combination of skin, muscles, ligaments and tendons and the character continues to use the limb, or even fight with it, as if nothing ever happened.


"Tis but a scratch!"


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## DaveM (Jun 29, 2015)

In the movies, drugs can apparently be injected with the syringe & needle at right angles to the vein.


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## KenOC (Mar 7, 2011)

Art Rock said:


> "Tis but a scratch!"


Or Fearless Fosdick (anybody remember him?) Has a bullet hole in him the size of a softball, says, "It's merely a superficial wound."


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## DaveM (Jun 29, 2015)

In the movies, everyone drinks hard liquor..straight up. It’s like everyone has 3 or 4 decanters of straight liquor on a table. Someone comes in the room and then comes the question, “Can I pour you a drink?” and half a glass of whiskey is poured into a glass. It can be any time of the day and the liquor has no apparent effect on anybody.


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## Triplets (Sep 4, 2014)

Manxfeeder said:


> They always talk in complete sentences, and the people who listen to them always understand what they're saying.
> 
> What I'm used to is, "You need to fix the, you know, thing." "What?" "You know, the thing." "I didn't hear you."


Unless the script is by David Mamet


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## Guest (Jul 29, 2018)

laurie said:


> Yeah ~ in real life the teenaged babysitter would_ never_ go down into the basement, either


It's not just teenagers though, adults creep downstairs whilst completely ignoring the ominous music.


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## elgar's ghost (Aug 8, 2010)

Even the Ramones knew better...

_'Hey, daddy-o
I don't wanna go down to the basement
There's somethin' down there...'_


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## Jos (Oct 14, 2013)

The sound of a Harley Davidson when you see a Honda four blasting of or vice versa.

After hot and sweaty uninhibited s.x the woman suddenly gets shy and covers herself in crispy clean white sheets, like a stoic philosopher. The guys always put on their boxers immediately after the dirty deed.


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## DaveM (Jun 29, 2015)

In the movies, private detectives always listen to jazz on vinyl and frequent jazz bars where they always know the pianist.


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## Radames (Feb 27, 2013)

Guys who get punched in the face over and over come out with a small scratch instead of a grossly swollen black and blue mess. And ever notice how no one ever has to take a bathroom break?


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## Jos (Oct 14, 2013)

DaveM said:


> In the movies, private detectives always listen to jazz on vinyl and frequent jazz bars where they always know the pianist.


And there is always a buxom, misty looking blond hanging around there. Where are those clubs!?


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## senza sordino (Oct 20, 2013)

Radames said:


> Guys who get punched in the face over and over come out with a small scratch instead of a grossly swollen black and blue mess. And ever notice how no one ever has to take a bathroom break?


As I was reading all of the comments, I was getting ready to make this comment. No one loses teeth during brutal fist fights. And any injuries heel within minutes and not weeks. If someone were to smash a chair over my back, I wouldn't be able to get up immediately and hit back with my powerful fists, I'd be in the hospital for weeks. No one goes to the bathroom. Though I'm not sure I'd like to see Tom Cruise sitting on the toilet. How can James Bond do all that drinking without showing any deleterious effects of the alcohol? And there's lots of drinking and driving.

In Star Wars, the spaceships move like airplanes in an atmosphere with gravity in the downward direction.


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## DaveM (Jun 29, 2015)

senza sordino said:


> As I was reading all of the comments, I was getting ready to make this comment. No one loses teeth during brutal fist fights. And any injuries heel within minutes and not weeks. If someone were to smash a chair over my back, I wouldn't be able to get up immediately and hit back with my powerful fists, I'd be in the hospital for weeks. No one goes to the bathroom. Though I'm not sure I'd like to see Tom Cruise sitting on the toilet. How can James Bond do all that drinking without showing any deleterious effects of the alcohol? And there's lots of drinking and driving.
> 
> In Star Wars, the spaceships move like airplanes in an atmosphere with gravity in the downward direction.


The lack of injury from hard objects & things like fists to soft tissues without injury is something being taken to an extreme even more these days. I walked out of John Wicker 2 because of it. A bare fist to the face breaks noses, jaws and causes things like blowout fractures where the floor of the eye socket fractures and collapses.


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## norman bates (Aug 18, 2010)




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## david johnson (Jun 25, 2007)

Perhaps I mentioned this before, but my deep research into the old Kung-Fu Theater flicks reveal that: regardless of how many times you are stabbed, speared, punched, kicked, thrown out the window/off the roof, you are never dead until the blood trickles out of your mouth.


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## Varick (Apr 30, 2014)

Art Rock said:


> Battles between space ships, including sound effects. Duh.


 I've got to give a pass on sounds in space. Imagine watching a sci-fi movie with a space battle and no sound. It just wouldn't work. So I forgive and accept that one.



Merl said:


> Horror movies where people go downstairs in the middle of the night to investigate a strange sound (without putting the lights on or waking their partner up). Wouldn't happen. Plus I'd be holding a 9 iron.


I'd be holding my 9mm.



Gordontrek said:


> But as for more general things, and this is more touchy of a subject than I usually discuss so I might get some flack: I never understood why in action movies you always have to have a scowling, sexy lady who is somehow capable of beating up entire gangs of burly dudes all by herself. It's unrealistic enough even when it's a jacked-up muscle man doing it, but even more so when a woman with the body of a runway model does. I suppose you have to appease the PC culture by letting them take refuge in fiction with stuff that would never happen in real life.


Yeah, it's kinda nice watching a hot chick kick ***. I find it even sexy, but that novelty wore off for me years ago, and it's just getting more ridiculous in the movies. I've studied martial arts most of my life. I've met women who are excellent in their abilities in the their art(s). They are still no match for a man who has any kind of size to him (average) and/or motivation. I've trained women in self-defense. I don't tell them they can eventually be like Scarlett Johansson in The Avengers because I would be lying. I tell them to carry weapons and show them how to use them, I show them defensive and offensive moves that can hurt and stun a man, and then I tell them to run like hell. That's reality.

Give me the biggest and most skilled man, put him against three or four abled bodied men coming at him at once and he's toast. Period. I laugh when I see the hero or heroin surrounded by 6 or 8 guys and they only go after the hero one at a time. That's the one that always gets me.

V


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## endelbendel (Jul 7, 2018)

Their seatbelts are always immediately straight, not twisted.


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## endelbendel (Jul 7, 2018)

The guy who is going to retire, get married, any meaningful positive life transition is the next or last one killed.


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## elgar's ghost (Aug 8, 2010)

A lone drunk staggering down a deserted alleyway singing to himself in the early hours of the morning is either going to get killed or stumble upon a dead body.


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## DaveM (Jun 29, 2015)

In the movies, surgeon's masks often lay flat across their chests. Masks are never tied on flat.


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## Oldhoosierdude (May 29, 2016)

People with southern accents are usually portrayed as dumb.

Wise cracking kids that are more funny than Seinfeld.

The shows star actors go on a dangerous mission and take some dude you've never seen before. That dude's gonna die.


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## geralmar (Feb 15, 2013)

I saw a horror movie where the gas station attendant in the middle of nowhere was literate, clean shaven, and helpful. I wish I could remember the title, the brief scene was so unnerving.

Incidentally, I believe gas station attendants -- particularly in the south and far west-- are the most denigrated and stereotyped persons in movies. Yet no outrage... .


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## KenOC (Mar 7, 2011)

geralmar said:


> Incidentally, I believe gas station attendants -- particularly in the south and far west-- are the most denigrated and stereotyped persons in movies. Yet no outrage... .


One of the best gas station attendants in movies is the ominous, uncouth, threatening one in _Cabin in the Woods_, at an isolated mountain refueling stop. It's a shock when our now-frightened teenagers leave his station and he pulls out a cell phone to calmly report their movements to some unseen authority...


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## Merl (Jul 28, 2016)

The worst movies for me are ones where the ending is one of those "it was all a dream" ones (or was it?). Le yawn.


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## Pat Fairlea (Dec 9, 2015)

Merl said:


> The worst movies for me are ones where the ending is one of those "it was all a dream" ones (or was it?). Le yawn.


You mean...surely not? This entire thread has been a drug-induced flashback??


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## Totenfeier (Mar 11, 2016)

senza sordino said:


> As I was reading all of the comments, I was getting ready to make this comment. No one loses teeth during brutal fist fights. And any injuries heel within minutes and not weeks. If someone were to smash a chair over my back, I wouldn't be able to get up immediately and hit back with my powerful fists, I'd be in the hospital for weeks. No one goes to the bathroom. Though I'm not sure I'd like to see Tom Cruise sitting on the toilet. How can James Bond do all that drinking without showing any deleterious effects of the alcohol? And there's lots of drinking and driving.
> 
> In Star Wars, the spaceships move like airplanes in an atmosphere with gravity in the downward direction.


My family is now resigned to the fact that, whenever a fistfight breaks out on screen, I am going to yell "Poke him in the eye!" As for James Bond - why is he _ever_ in a fistfight, anyway, especially in a precarious place such as a catwalk? He's a secret agent! Shouldn't he know 11 different ways to render someone immobile with just his little finger?


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## elgar's ghost (Aug 8, 2010)

Varick said:


> I've got to give a pass on sounds in space. Imagine watching a sci-fi movie with a space battle and no sound. It just wouldn't work. So I forgive and accept that one.
> 
> I'd be holding my 9mm.
> 
> _Yeah, it's kinda nice watching a hot chick kick ***. I find it even sexy, but that novelty wore off for me years ago, and it's just getting more ridiculous in the movies._


It palls for me as their only line ever seems to be 'Let's do this...'


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## DaveM (Jun 29, 2015)

Ever notice how in some movies, a character takes a knife and cuts the palm of the hand or finger to make themselves bleed. Sometime it’s a brotherhood ritual or they need the blood for something. Cuts like that can take a long time to heal and they hurt like hell, but, in no time, these characters are using their hands as if nothing happened.


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## geralmar (Feb 15, 2013)

I've always wondered why, particularly in slasher movies, to escape the psycho pursuing in the car (headlights blazing) the intended victim invariably chooses to run down the center of the road. I, for one, would dive into the bushes and skedaddle through the woods.


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## Oldhoosierdude (May 29, 2016)

One of my favorites:

A man and woman are hot and heavy arguing tooth and nail, in each others faces

then without warning

they fall to the floor and do the other hot and heavy.

(To any guy tempted to try this, it is truly not advisable)


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## geralmar (Feb 15, 2013)

I've always wondered about the actual intellectual superiority of space aliens who invade earth to steal our water. They're smart enough to build spaceships that can fly across the galaxy yet can't figure out how to combine hydrogen and oxygen, the first and third most abundant elements in the universe.


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