# Musical Effects



## Guest (Oct 5, 2014)




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## MoonlightSonata (Mar 29, 2014)

Oh, I think I put that on the jokes thread.
More: Chopin effect: the child says only sad things, but speaks eloquently and grammatically.
Orff effect: Child says something poetic and profound and then orders people to forget everything else they ever said.
Holst effect: Opposite of above - child says something wonderful and then asks everyone to forget it.
Ravel effect: Child says one important thing and then repeats it, louder and louder each time.


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## brianvds (May 1, 2013)

Debussy effect: Child becomes kind of dreamy and spends hours staring at clouds or ripples on water.

Rachmaninov effect: Child becomes a suicide risk.

Schumann effect: The child never grows up.

Bartok effect: Child spends hours pedaling his tricycle through a deserted motel, seeing visions of dead people.

Tchaikovsky effect: The child becomes seriously gay. And emotional.

Brahms effect: Child becomes rude and insulting to everyone around him.


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## Blancrocher (Jul 6, 2013)

Gesualdo effect: Child is jealous, domineering, and violent with other children, but has a rare gift for eloquent apologies.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

D Scarlatti effect: child speaks rapidly, bursting with energy and amazingly finds 500 creative ways to say exactly the same thing.


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## Ian Moore (Jun 28, 2014)

Isn't it a gimmick? Unless it's integral to the music. E.g. Berlioz's Symphony Fantastique.


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## MoonlightSonata (Mar 29, 2014)

Peri effect: Child says something massively original, and is ignored by everyone.


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## Guest (Oct 5, 2014)

Xenakis effect: Child utters horrifying screeching noises not normally associated with humans.
Carulli effect: Child makes pleasant but insipid conversation.
Shostakovich effect: Child alternates making morbid and sarcastic comments.


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## MoonlightSonata (Mar 29, 2014)

Allegri Effect: Child shows a dislike of sopranos and trebles, and often demands that they sing their highest notes.


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## PetrB (Feb 28, 2012)

Ian Moore said:


> Isn't it a gimmick? Unless it's integral to the music. E.g. Berlioz's Symphony Fantastique.


Child is born to and reared by a grammar expert and a linguist; later in life, takes everything they read or hear literally, struggles and fails to grasp analogies, parables, understands no abstracts, doesn't get any jokes.


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## trazom (Apr 13, 2009)

Mendelssohn effect: Child makes brilliant first impression, but becomes increasingly trite and insipid over the years.



brianvds said:


> Tchaikovsky effect: The child becomes seriously gay. And emotional.


Not that there'd be anything wrong with that, of course, the Saint-Saens effect on the other hand...


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## SONNET CLV (May 31, 2014)

hpowders said:


> D Scarlatti effect: child speaks rapidly, bursting with energy and amazingly finds 500 creative ways to say exactly the same thing.


Vivaldi effect -- identical to the D Scarlatti effect, except that child holds a bow while doing so, and allows for seasonal differences.


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## brianvds (May 1, 2013)

SONNET CLV said:


> Vivaldi effect -- identical to the D Scarlatti effect, except that child holds a bow while doing so, and allows for seasonal differences.


You beat me to it. 

Prokofiev effect: Child habitually glues thorns onto soft toys.


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## techniquest (Aug 3, 2012)

> Prokofiev effect: Child habitually glues thorns onto soft toys.


That's the one that made me chuckle


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

SONNET CLV said:


> Vivaldi effect -- identical to the D Scarlatti effect, except that child holds a bow while doing so, and allows for seasonal differences.


:lol::lol::lol:


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

brianvds said:


> You beat me to it.
> 
> Prokofiev effect: Child habitually glues thorns onto soft toys.


I used to do that as a kid.


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## brianvds (May 1, 2013)

Wagner effect: Child is wonderfully original, but given to fits of pomposity and xenophobia. May also express a desire to invade Poland.

Orff effect: Child becomes a dipsomaniac who sings bawdy songs.

Holst effect: Child becomes an astrologer.

Salieri effect: Child becomes insanely jealous and attempts to poison his peers.

Vangelis effect: Child runs in slow motion on a beach.

Enya effect: Child phases in and out of consciousness.

Bieber effect: You don't want to go there...


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## Itullian (Aug 27, 2011)

What's the Mahler effect?


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## Mahlerian (Nov 27, 2012)

Itullian said:


> What's the Mahler effect?


Mahler Effect: Child speaks in mixture of slang and erudite vocabulary that intrigues some and infuriates others. Spends a lot of time walking in the woods and through graveyards.


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## MoonlightSonata (Mar 29, 2014)

Reich effect: Child listens intently to weather forecasts and then repeats them over and over and over and over and over and...


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## brianvds (May 1, 2013)

Raff effect: Child becomes an also-ran.

Mussorgsky effect: Child becomes a heavy drinker with an interest in the occult.

Dvorak effect: Child steals all his best ideas from Americans.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

Salieri effect: Wily child poisons his brilliant physics lab partner, steals his research report and claims it as his own and waits for a movie to be made to absolve him of all guilt.


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## MoonlightSonata (Mar 29, 2014)

Stockhausen effect (I refer to a particular work here): Child becomes obsessed with the harmonic series and hums it all the time, not stopping to speak.


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## EdwardBast (Nov 25, 2013)

The real Prokofiev effect: Child keeps track of the errors made by his adult classmates in a conservatory theory class, lets them know their scores, and is hated by all — except Myaskovsky.


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## Cosmos (Jun 28, 2013)

Haydn Effect: Child becomes an elegant prankster


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## Crudblud (Dec 29, 2011)

Webern effect: Child answers teacher's questions succinctly and with precision, but classes are held up for hours to allow adequate thinking time.


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## Woodduck (Mar 17, 2014)

Sibelius effect: Child counts to seven, then claims he knows what the next number is but refuses to say it.

Mahler effect: Child counts to ten, but becomes so nervous when pronouncing "nine" that all he can say after that is "t..."


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## papsrus (Oct 7, 2014)

techniquest said:


> That's the one that made me chuckle


me too.......

(this is a marvelous quick music guide, btw).


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## Sid James (Feb 7, 2009)

Beethoven effect: Child refuses to have a hair cut, bathe or change into clean clothes.

Rossini effect: Child brings the best lunches to school and is the stereotyped merry fat kid.

Copland effect: Child has a ten gallon hat and lasoo wherever he goes.

Stravinsky effect: Child always follows the trends of others which he then claims to have created, and everyone believes him based on the rumours he spreads with his gossip.

Wagner effect: Child who always asks others to lend him lunch money and they stupidly do, despite him never giving it back.

Satie effect: Child likes skip school to wander around town, collect umbrellas and play piano in night clubs.

Bernstein effect: Child doesn't hesitate to dance the mambo and get up in front of the class to conduct a jazzy fugue, no matter what music he hears.

Villa-Lobos effect: Child has a pet toucan which is with him all the time, its trained to whistle his arrangements of Bach tunes.

Bax effect: Child was into the Celtic fad long before anyone else, has a tattoo on his right arm dating back before it was totally passe to get one.


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## KenOC (Mar 7, 2011)

Schoenberg effect: Child claims to have made discovery that will put him at top of class for a hundred years.


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## MoonlightSonata (Mar 29, 2014)

Penderecki Effect: Child develops tendency to scream and hit hollow things to create massive amounts of sound. Generally has a depressing effect on surrounding people. Effect caused by childhood trauma.


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## Art Rock (Nov 28, 2009)

Moeran effect: child is brilliant but hardly anybody notices.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

I guess....moer or loess.


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## Woodduck (Mar 17, 2014)

hpowders said:


> I guess....moer or loess.


Are you aware that loess is a kind of dirt? Maybe you're thinking of moraine.


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## Marschallin Blair (Jan 23, 2014)

Woodduck said:


> Are you aware that loess is a kind of dirt? Maybe you're thinking of moraine.


Or perhaps, "murrain."


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

Woodduck said:


> Are you aware that loess is a kind of dirt? Maybe you're thinking of moraine.


Sure I am! Last week as a matter of fact I got deloessed, completely paid by Medicare.


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## HaydnBearstheClock (Jul 6, 2013)

Beethoven effect: child grows a massive amount of dishevelled, grey hair. Disrespect for authorities increases. When addressed, punches all interlocutors in the face.

Brahms effect: child takes 15 years to finish his first homework assignment. When he hands it in, he immediately gets a PhD. 

Liszt effect: child develops amazing dexterity and agility, starts becoming incresingly popular with young members of the opposite sex. Stuns them with virtuosic displays and induces swooning fits. 

Chopin effect: child starts making delicate, ironic comments tinged with multiple meanings. 

Schubert effect: child starts sleep-walking, wandering alone at night in the midnight fog. Comes back, sits down and writes lieder about his ventures. 

Bach effect: child locks himself up, reads the Bible fervently and composes fugues in large numbers. 

Vivaldi effect: child grows up red-haired, quickly becomes a priest and surrounds himself with virtuous nuns who adore him and worship his musical genius.


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## trazom (Apr 13, 2009)

HaydnBearstheClock said:


> Chopin effect: child starts making delicate, ironic comments tinged with multiple meanings.


I like this. My favorite comments are the ones that are so obscure that only I find them funny.:lol:


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## HaydnBearstheClock (Jul 6, 2013)

Haydn effect: when a parent tries to sit on a chair, he or she finds it suddenly absent, and may also find him/herself on the floor and flat on their *****. Parents may also discover a portion of their hair cut off and may also often be 'caught off guard' by their youngster, who develops a knack for hiding behind unexpected corners and thus 'surprising' oblivious victims. 

Wagner effect: child starts disliking Jews. When asked why, writes detailed academic papers in an attempt to justify his views. 
Despite these shortcomings, develops immense musical talent. 

Mozart effect: child develops prodigious musical talent. Starts composing obscene musical pieces at the young age of 3. The more academic the musical form, the more obscene the message. To achieve these effects, has to be forced by its parents.


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## Sid James (Feb 7, 2009)

Weber effect: Child keeps getting called Webern, which is the name of another kid in his class.

Bob Schumann effect: Child has same problem as above, people are always calling him Bill.

Rachmaninov effect: Child is talented and popular but somehow ends up being the scapegoat for nearly everything.

Berg effect: Child is the best looking boy in the class, yet always seems to experience 'girl trouble.'

Xenakis effect: Child sets up a metal band called The Mictrotonal Architectronic Dodecaphonics (T-MAD) in his final year of school, they have one big hit but then disband to pursue solo careers due to 'artistic differences' (translated into 'we had a big **** fight').


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## MoonlightSonata (Mar 29, 2014)

Monteverdi Effect: Child says something wonderful and nearly original, but reputation is forever tarnished by minute lack of originality.


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