# Do we need beards? (Males only probably)



## KenOC

The discussion on another thread suggest that a poll is necessary. Should we have beards?


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## Ingélou

Why males only? I am happy to concede that beards don't look good on female faces, but 'do we need beards?' is the thread title. *I do!* I've threatened to divorce Taggart if he shaves it off.

Mind you, I could be seduced by the idea of 'a short, neatly trimmed *bear*' - sounds cuddly!


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## Ingélou

No, you need female input. You need to know that 'stylish stubble', though it looks nice, is *very prickly* to kiss, as I've found out since kissing friends hello & goodbye became fashionable. 
(Or that's my story... )


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## Taggart

Pooh, Paddington and Rupert are upset at the thought that they might be vertically challenged and in need of a haircut.


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## PetrB

Ingélou said:


> Why males only? I am happy to concede that beards don't look good on female faces, but 'do we need beards?' is the thread title. *I do!* I've threatened to divorce Taggart if he shaves it off.
> 
> Mind you, I could be seduced by the idea of 'a short, neatly trimmed *bear*' - sounds cuddly!


I voted for "Short bears, neatly trimmed, are best," _solely on the basis of its typo and taking that literally_: the idea of having neatly trimmed short bears bumbling about and as part of our lives kinda amused


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## ptr

I find it unbeardingly chauvinist that it is implied that there is something culturally unacceptable with bearded ladies! 

/ptr


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## Skilmarilion

The lack of a _Tchaikovsky option_ is disconcerting. This what all men should strive for!









Nevertheless, something between light and heavy stubble is my M.O.


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## SimonNZ

Taggart said:


> Pooh, Paddington and Rupert are upset at the thought that they might be vertically challenged and in need of a haircut.


Pooh and Paddington almost certainly need knots from honey and marmalade spillages cut out of their fur on a regular basis.

Re the OP: yes, insofar as pipes are cool and beards go with pipes.

My message to the kids of the world: smoking cigarettes is bad. But smoking pipes is very, very cool. Therefor you should grow a beard at the first opportunity.


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## violadude

I actually don't like my beard that much. It makes me look like a weird homeless dwarf or something. But I don't shave it much because it's such a tedious and time consuming process. But it's only tedious and time consuming because I let it get this long...

So ya...it's mostly just because I'm lazy and haven't made shaving a real habit yet.


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## elgar's ghost

Taggart said:


> Pooh, Paddington and Rupert are upset at the thought that they might be vertically challenged and in need of a haircut.


'Cause you know what they say about honey bears,
When you shave off all their baby hair,
You have a hairy minded pink bare bear...'

(from Andy's Chest by Lou Reed - 1972)


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## Guest

Thank heaven for that, Ken...I was suffering withdrawal symptoms, as there hadn't been a worthwhile poll for ages.

I went for stylish stubble. As a non-beardy guy, stylish stubble is all I can...and am allowed...to muster.


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## Mahlerian

I can't really grow a good beard myself, but this young gentleman certainly could!


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## hpowders

^^^Well, if Gustav didn't make it as a composer, he could have lived off the royalties using that photo of his on the Smith Brothers cough drop box.


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## senza sordino

I used to have a beard, I have a weak chin so this helped. I shaved it off seven years ago because it got very grey and made me look much older. I don't mind short beards, but not for me anymore. I am who I am. Weak chinned.


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## Cheyenne

Beards are overrated; those handsome Matthew Arnold-style sideburns are where it's all at!


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## Headphone Hermit

Boo! 

I want to vote for "its your chin, do what you want with it"


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## Blake

I can grow a beard like a mountain-man, but it gets itchy so I keep a short stubble instead. Clean up the neck a bit and buzz the rest short with some clippers… stylish.


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## KenOC

Cheyenne said:


> Beards are overrated; those handsome Matthew Arnold-style sideburns are where it's all at!
> 
> View attachment 39832


That waltz guy had some fancy 'burns, but he didn't totally eschew the beard.


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## Vaneyes

*Total lack of evolution* is a good description.

But what really irritates, is isolated growth beneath one's lower lip. A reverse Hitler, so to speak. I've taken to calling them "****-me-offs".


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## ArtMusic

Yes, Santa Claus wouldn't look right without a beard.


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## TurnaboutVox

Sorry, I have a beard-poll phobia, so I can't participate


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## aleazk

violadude said:


> I actually don't like my beard that much. It makes me look like a weird homeless dwarf or something. But I don't shave it much because it's such a tedious and time consuming process. But it's only tedious and time consuming because I let it get this long...
> 
> So ya...it's mostly just because I'm lazy and haven't made shaving a real habit yet.


My flatmate has the latest electric shaver and that seems to be the solution (no water, no foam, etc., i.e., all of those things that make shaving a tedious activity)


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## Manxfeeder

I can't grow one, so nobody else should out of respect for my handicap.


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## mtmailey

I am not a beard fan i rather have no beard with a light mustache to have that professional look


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## Katie

This hipster driven trend toward expansive facial hair is kinda gross from my perspective...though it also may be correlative with the effort by 20-somethings to camouflage that double chin, which now seems to manifest about 20 years earlier than their father's...anyway, I adore clean shaven.


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## mirepoix

^^^^I never thought of it as a double chin hiding device. But I'd considered it as perhaps disguising a lack of chin.

Anyway, I'm not one to talk because if anyone should grow a beard it should be me. The combination of my former hobby and also unfortunate encounters with a number of _bad sports_, means my face is considerably scarred. A beard would hide some of it. But then again, a beard would also hide the dimple on my chin, which would mean my companion could no longer tap and press it with an elegantly manicured finger at least once a day. And life requires such small pleasures.

Also -









"And stop pointing that beard at me, it might go off!"


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## brotagonist

I vote for all of the options, except the first and last: anywhere from stubble to somewhat shaggy, but not the extremes. I might grow mine back one of these days, just to get to the shaggy point, just to see how it would look, but I don't think I would keep it indefinitely.


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## Huilunsoittaja

I do like clean-shaven for men, but if he has something stylish around the lips, I like that. It's too bad that plain mustaches are kinda out of fashion, or at least makes someone look way older than they are nowadays.


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## Whistler Fred

Well...


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## Morimur

I keep a close shave as my avatar indicates... I also wear a wig and enjoy long walks on the beach. Tee-hee!


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## hpowders

Mutton chops.


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## samurai

As long as *ISIS *and its various sister thug group allies are in existence and and wear them as part and parcel of their "religion"--hopefully, for not too much longer, Allah willing--it's strictly clean shaven for me.


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## Blake

samurai said:


> As long as *ISIS *and its various sister thug group allies are in existence and and wear them as part and parcel of their "religion"--hopefully, for not too much longer, Allah willing--it's strictly clean shaven for me.


Don't let them steal what's natural. Beards are had by many calibers of man. We'll be the good men with the beards.


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## Albert7

Sorry epic fail for me. Can't grow out much from me


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## Dave Whitmore

I never look good in a beard. I just look scruffy. Some men just don't look good in a beard I guess.


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## Posie

I had a great friend in high school whom I called "Hurricane Johnny" because of the hurricane shapes in his stubble.


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## hpowders

Dave Whitmore said:


> I never look good in a beard. I just look scruffy. Some men just don't look good in a beard I guess.


Beards are good if you have a double chin or loose neck skin. A beard hides it.

So you date with the beard. Then when you get married, shave it off and watch her SCREAM!!!! :lol:


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## hpowders

Dave Whitmore said:


> I never look good in a beard. I just look scruffy. Some men just don't look good in a beard I guess.


I used to have a mustache. No beard. I was strongly urged to shave it off. Fine advice. In exchange, I've been having delicious dinners ever since!


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## Dave Whitmore

hpowders said:


> Beards are good if you have a double chin or loose neck skin. A beard hides it.
> 
> So you date with the beard. Then when you get married, shave it off and watch her SCREAM!!!! :lol:


:lol:

That's a good one!


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## hpowders

Dave Whitmore said:


> :lol:
> 
> That's a good one!


It's the only way to retaliate when we finally get to see the wife without the makeup.

Shave the beard when she takes off the makeup and see who screams the loudest! :lol:


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## Dave Whitmore

hpowders said:


> It's the only way to retaliate when we finally get to see the wife without the makeup.
> 
> Shave the beard when she takes off the makeup and see who screams the loudest! :lol:


:lol: That's too funny!


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## ptr

With a reseeding hairline on top, I've got more hair in my face then on my head! I usually use my gramps saying; A man without a beard is a juvenile and I would do anything to look adult!

/ptr


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## TurnaboutVox

ptr said:


> ...I've got more hair in my face then on my head!
> /ptr


I still have both, but the beard is winning...


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## HaydnBearstheClock

........................


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## Levanda

I guess she or he is have nice look, she or he is winner eurovision 2014 from Austria.


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## ptr

Levanda said:


> View attachment 56747
> 
> I guess she or he is have nice look, she or he is winner eurovision 2014 from Austria.


I Swedish we have a gender-neutral personal pronoun (Hen), that in official lingo shall replace He and She (Han and Hon), is there such in the flowery English language? I have a feeling that Conchita Wurst is just such a gender-neutral beast!? 

/ptr


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## Guest

I voted Brahms! and I think it abhorrent one might trim a bear just for shallow fashion reasons.


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## hpowders

Dave Whitmore said:


> :lol: That's too funny!


Thanks. It's what I do, to the chagrin of some.


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## hpowders

TurnaboutVox said:


> I still have both, but the beard is winning...


Fooled me! You don't seem to write, bearded.


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## Mahlerian

ptr said:


> I Swedish we have a gender-neutral personal pronoun (Hen), that in official lingo shall replace He and She (Han and Hon), is there such in the flowery English language? I have a feeling that Conchita Wurst is just such a gender-neutral beast!?
> 
> /ptr


Nope, not yet anyway. In essays and the like, writers are either encouraged to use laborious constructions like he/she or his/her, or to simply vary the gender of one's generic referents.


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## TurnaboutVox

hpowders said:


> Fooled me! You don't seem to write, bearded.


I may be being a bit dim, but try as I might I can't make sense of this post, hp. Care to elucidate?


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## Figleaf

I like a neatly clipped beard, preferably of the elegantly pointed kind lampooned upthread by Mirepoix and Groucho Marx. Like most of the stuff I like, it belongs to a bygone age.

One question for beard aficionados: on a different thread, a female poster (unfortunately I've forgotten who) was complaining about male singers with 'dead hamster beards', which made me laugh. Anyone know what a dead hamster beard would look like? Is it a reference to beard shape (in which case I find it hard to picture) or to hair colour? Any clarification welcomed!


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## Xaltotun

After Reason has triumphed there shall be no more beards, and we shall be Romans, if not Greeks, again.
Before that, though, there must be beards; stoic beards, sad beards, contemplative beards, violent beards, beautiful and deceitful beards, beards that hide and obscure, defiant beards that show contempt, ironic beards and mocking beards, overgrown beards and over-styled beards.
Gustave Moreau's Jupiter in _Jupiter and Semele_ has no beard. This chilling Jupiter is the most divine of them all. Also, Michelangelo's Christ in the _Last Judgement_ has no beard, and thus, it triumphs even over Raphael's _Transfiguration_, by a hair-length. 
Adam grew a beard after the expulsion. And when the Apocalypse comes, the Revelation shall be the Revelation of the Chin, now bare for all to see, the beard torn asunder like Parsifal revealing the Grail from beneath the veil. In the Eternal Present, the Eternal Now, there shall be no Time for the beard to grow, and all shall be well.


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## scratchgolf

We need beards


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## trazom

As long as you are in full acceptance of yourself, you do not need one. John Travolta's had one since 1991 and nobody but his most rabid fans are fooled.

All joking aside, I voted for short beard..reluctantly. Few can wear the beard convincingly.


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## ptr

The reclaim facial hair for non terrorist dudes movement!
*..beards-r-us!*






​
..a few minutes ago, had to block out my nostril hairs (dem es jus to curly)!

/ptr


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## scratchgolf

ptr said:


> The reclaim facial hair for non terrorist dudes movement!
> *..beards-r-us!*
> 
> View attachment 56925​
> ..a few minutes ago, had to block out my nostril hairs (dem es jus to curly)!
> 
> /ptr


I'll see your beard and raise you........







.....an axe and a cigar!!


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## ptr

scratchgolf said:


> .....an axe and a cigar!!


You win man, I really don't do cigars and am way to lazy to go out to shed to get out the fifties chainsaw to stage a picture... 

/ptr


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## scratchgolf

We have all the time in the world. Sadly, I shaved for a funeral a few weeks ago but I'm back on the wagon and growing as fast as possible.


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## mirepoix

^^^^ you shaved _with_ the axe, all the while smoking the cigar, yes? Good stuff.


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