# Has your piano playing ever wooed someone?



## Matsps

I thought I would ask this here as it is often portrayed in films and television that being a pianist is an attractive quality and sometimes can even woo someone on the spot. 

In my life however, I have found that most girlfriends dislike my piano playing! Not because I'm an awful pianist (honest), but because they just find my playing and practicing annoying, and never have I actually romantically impressed or even wooed someone with it.

So, are the films correct, or is real life much like how I have found?


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## Dustin

I've wooed a girl or two with piano playing. And I've wooed a girl or two with lies about piano playing. I think some girls will like it and some who are not so musically inclined could care less.


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## PetrB

Not one-to-one, like in so many lame story plots.

BUT, as 'That guy playing and directing the band in the pit, or onstage, the phenomenon of those who don't know you at all but were deeply moved by what you played and how you played it, and then transfer that emotion to your person, i.e _to you,_ is quite real.

I've had if not directly, then strongly implicit, parties (of both genders) meeting me after a performance, all glazed eyes and with that sort of body language where they are swaying on their feet and leaning in toward you as if they were iron filings and you the magnet, clearly if not an invitation at least a wide-open easily taken advantage of well of want. [The general aura of them is very like those cult members who have been put in isolation for six weeks to two months, fed only carbs and sugary drinks, and brainwashed / programmed for the entire duration -- more than a little creepy and a bit scary]

That kind of attention is so utterly disconnected with who or what you truly are that it is comically surreal, and since that was my take on it, I learned to not feel awkward or wrongly importuned and instead take it as the flattery it is (in a way, music and your rendering of it has ensorcelled them, ergo, you have been upgraded to the rating of "sorcerer," which for a performer is very big-time flattery.)

I learned quickly to deflect those attentions while not hurting or insulting them, take the flattery as genuine, and then turn to the next audience member who wanted to congratulate or meet me. (Why people think to shake the hand of a pianist who has just given those hands a heavy workout for between twenty minutes to about two hours ten is in any way cool, I'll never understand 

If you are in that position and are of a more opportunistic nature to 'go ahead' with some of those 'suitors,' I suppose it is then considered a real boon... if that's what floats your boat....

P.s. Glamor of music and musician first attraction aside, in a sustained relationship the reality that you practice hours a day, and the more than implied this is your first love to which you devote all that energy and attention... well, many who thought they 'loved you' become quickly jealous of the time you spend with the music, and not them. _*Caveat emptor *_


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## hreichgott

Everyone thinks dating a pianist will be romantic until they actually experience the realities of practicing...


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## Krummhorn

My wife loves to hear me play the piano at home ... says I don't play it enough. It wasn't my piano playing skills that wooed her into our relationship though ...


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## regressivetransphobe

yes, a very nice deaf girl I know


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## PetrB

regressivetransphobe said:


> yes, a very nice deaf girl I know


But she_ loves _the vibrations


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## Ukko

Back in the days when I had any interest in wooing, I discovered that my piano playing was effective only on women who chose to enhance their appearance with waist-length black hair and matching armpit hairpieces. In and of itself this was only mildly disturbing; unfortunately the 'look' was invariably combined with a strange set of notions regarding domination.


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## PetrB

It was Bessie Smith, I believe, who before they went onstage to perform, turned to one of the musicians she would be singing with and said, "Watch. Tonight, I'm gonna walk one."

Up on stage, while singing, she focused her attention on one man in the audience on the main floor, who rose from his seat as in a trance, walked to the stairs at the side of the stage and crossed the stage straight to Bessie.

_That_ is the power some performers have. LOL.


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## Sofronitsky

Piano wooing seems to only work if the women (or men I suppose) are already mildly interested in you without knowing you are a fine pianist, but then hear you play once or twice and their interest elevates dramatically. This has been my experience on one or two occasions, but mostly my piano playing has no real effect on my relationships except when a recital or competition rolls around. 

It would be awesome if my playing could woo someone from another room one day like Chopin is portrayed as doing in the many bad Chopin films


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## Novelette

I am unsure about wooing, but my best friend and I bonded by virtue of being able to share our mutual love of playing the piano. Perhaps incidental, but ultimately contributory.


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## Il_Penseroso

I was 12 and it came to me that the neighbour girl opens her window and listens to me whenever I play Chopin's A minor Waltz (Op.34 No.2). Well, I didn't mean to woo her, but seeing her excitement, I used to play Chopin over and over from since then! Actually she was my sister's friend and she told my sister: "When my time will come, I'll marry your brother!". It's more than 20 years now, and yes, she's still not married! But of course it was just a childish innocent comment and we both have different ways of our own.


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## aleazk

No, I don't think so, at least no in a "direct" manner, i.e., because of the playing "itself".

I barely play these days, anyway.


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## treeza

Most guys I've come across are suckers for Rachmaninoff...
Probably because they've never heard music like it before. Mozart would be my weakness should anyone want to win me over.


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## Op.123

I played the first movement of the Schumann concerto at our local village hall and was given free cake! Yay! I love cake.


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## JCarmel

Good for you, Burroughs! What a lovely combination...the Schumann Concerto & cake?!


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## Op.123

JCarmel said:


> Good for you, Burroughs! What a lovely combination...the Schumann Concerto & cake?!


Thanks 

Best combination there is


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## hreichgott

Burroughs said:


> I played the first movement of the Schumann concerto at our local village hall and was given free cake! Yay! I love cake.


This post made me so happy 
Congratulations on your performance!


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## Op.123

hreichgott said:


> This post made me so happy
> Congratulations on your performance!


Thanks! 
...........


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## MissLemko

I don't know about other girls...but I get wooed by pianists all the time. Especially if the programme includes the Ocean Etude (emotionally connected with this one, I don't usually get squishy because of Chopin), or if the pianist decides to play THE fingering in Liszt's Mazeppa. Instant woo!


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## Ravndal

No. But I have been wooed


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## Pysmythe

Back in my "playing in public" days, I had folks tell me my interpretations were quite good, that I had "a lot of passion" in my playing, and I would even get requests to improvise something, which, honestly, I liked to do more than anything else, because you could never really tell how that was going to turn out. One day, when this wasn't going particularly well, I suddenly got angry at myself and thought, "Oh, the heck with it, just let it all hang out and don't worry about it. Confound it, man, just DO something! For heaven's sake, you can make SOMETHING, at least, out of just about ANY idea..." And all of a sudden I had one of those rare times when things really started to click. I got into the zone and just lost myself, couldn't have cared less that anyone else was there. Right afterwards, a lovely blonde lady came up to me, seeming quite emotionally taken, and breathed, "There's so much feeling in your playing. Oh, I just loved it," or words to that effect. The punchline? The "venue" was just a comfy little coffee-bistro my wife and I used to frequent, and the instrument was an old upright-grand in the corner that hadn't been tuned in about 75 years, and looked like it had been dragged behind a pioneer wagon at some point. We're talking severely chipped and jangly... But it seemed I made an impression on that nice young lady, whoever she was (and, yes, I am certain she was NOT a hooker!), before my wife came to claim me. What I didn't have a chance to tell her, and probably would not have, anyway, was that all that fine "feeling" was pretty much borne out of self-disgust and anger, emotions that have got to be familiar enough territory to any musician. I'm not sure this really qualifies as having exactly wooed someone with my playing, but I thought it was a funny story I'd share.


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## DavidA

Never wooed anyone with my playing. Sent quite a few running in the opposite direction, though!


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## PetrB

_Back in the days...._ In the summer break from conservatory, I did the near obligatory road trip leading to a full summer in California. In San Francisco, with a lady friend, walking around and sightseeing, we stopped in a cafe in North Beach for a sit and a coffee, and in there was a decent full upright piano staring at me. I asked if it was alright to play, got a yes and then did, having a good number of pieces from memory at the time, Scarlatti, Poulenc, Mozart, Beethoven, Chopin, Debussy, etc.

After a while I had finished what was a 'good set,' and went back to the table to join my friend and drink my coffee. A waitress then came to our table and laid out two full plates, sandwiches, soup, etc. compliments of the house, a thank you for the music and a kindness from the management.

Once, at least, I wooed 'a restaurant' by playing the piano and had directly _played for my supper_


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## Varick

Yes, many times. Sometimes intentionally, sometimes unintentionally. One of my brothers (I'm the youngest of five) played football in college. I would go to his games often and then to the after party. Every once in a while, the party would be at someone's house, and a piano would be there. I would start playing, then suddenly my brother would get comments (this one was my favorite from his best friend to this day) like, "Phil, you made the block, and I scored the winning touchdown. We should be surrounded by chicks, instead, they're all in the living room surrounding your brother. We did it all wrong Phil, we should have been musicians." Those nights were never lonely for me.

When I was a bachelor living in NYC, I had my piano in my apartment. I lived alone and often hosted parties (usually wine tastings). Again, after I "performed" for the guests, it was almost always clear on how my night was going to end.

I'm not bragging, and I say this in complete sincerity: I can't count how many women I've "wooed" by playing the piano. To this day, I still "Woo" my wife whenever I play! 

However, I must admit to a lot of truth to some above posts: Very few people enjoy the "practice." Almost everyone enjoys the "performance."

V


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## Varick

Ooh, I almost forgot the most important part. I meant to add, that the amount of women I wooed by playing the piano was not because of "me." It's the nature and power of music and the ability of creating music. I've been at a plethora of parties without a piano, and lo and behold, women were not ogling me.

I was wooed myself in college. There was another student who when I first saw, wasn't attracted to her. She wasn't unattractive, but she wasn't very attractive either. A few weeks later, I heard her play: WOW! Suddenly, she became rather attractive after that.

The power of music indeed!

V


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## Svelte Silhouette

Mine would scare them away only bettered by my violin playing as a child.

I remember our cat ran away.


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## Harlequin

I am new to the forum and saw this post, I thought it was quite amusing. Although I have never wooed a woman with my piano playing skills I might have wooed her with the piano itself. I have included a picture to show you what I mean... =)


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