# What do you say to friends who hate classical music?



## Enthusiast (Mar 5, 2016)

We must all have friends who feel that sitting through even a 15 minute piece that transports us to heaven would be a torture. Do you try to convert them? Do you convince them to give it a try? Or do you just avoid the question with them? There are also similar questions about friends who like some classical music but not your favourite composer or a composer you think is especially worthwhile.


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## Kjetil Heggelund (Jan 4, 2016)

Talk about cars instead or the weather


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## Art Rock (Nov 28, 2009)

There's just as much point as having a rap enthusiast trying to convince me that I should listen to this and that rap god.


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## San Antone (Feb 15, 2018)

We discuss music which we both like.


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## Merl (Jul 28, 2016)

I've given up trying to 'convert' people. I know few people who 'hate' orchestral music, they are usually just indifferent to it. Most like the odd popular piece. Most of my mates are rockers so I discuss rock music with them.


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## Guest (Jul 5, 2018)

I've never thought much of evangelising.


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## elgar's ghost (Aug 8, 2010)

My knowledge and appreciation of classical music has been nurtured nigh-on exclusively as a result of my own efforts so I tend to keep the subject to myself in a social situation, especially as virtually no-one in my immediate circle professes to have any discernible affinity for it. If anyone who knows I like it does happen to ask me something then I will gladly talk, but classical music for me is pretty much a solitary pastime, a situation I'm more than happy with.


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## chill782002 (Jan 12, 2017)

I agree with all the comments made thus far. I'm 43 and all my friends are of are of a similar age or older. If they don't like it by now then it's unlikely that they will suddenly change their minds. I only discuss classical music with the very small number of those friends who share my interest in it.


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## Guest (Jul 5, 2018)

chill782002 said:


> I agree with all the comments made thus far. I'm 43 and all my friends are of are of a similar age or older. If they don't like it by now then it's unlikely that they will suddenly change their minds. I only discuss classical music with the very small number of those friends who share my interest in it.


You're probably right, although I only became interested in my early 50s.


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## chill782002 (Jan 12, 2017)

dogen said:


> You're probably right, although I only became interested in my early 50s.


I stand corrected although you would appear to be an exceptional case based on my own experience.


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## Guest (Jul 5, 2018)

I'm a slow learner


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## janxharris (May 24, 2010)

My friends response to hearing my favourite piece:

_...to be honest, it didn't do a lot for me. I found it a little dull and generic, the kind of generic background music you would hear in a film, but not the main theme score. Just uninspiring, for me, didn't excite me at all..._


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## goatygoatygoatgoat (May 28, 2018)

_"What do you say to friends who hate classical music?"_

I say, "Just shut the f%#@ up and listen, moron!"

No, actually, (like elgars ghost said) it's a a solitary pastime and I don't even mention it. I have tried, on a couple internet forums, posting Baroque music in music threads, but I'd say I have about a 100% failure rate convincing anyone. Hell, I even doubt I can convince people _here_, who listen to Classical music but hate Baroque to listen to music I'd suggest.


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## jim prideaux (May 30, 2013)

I am currently listening to Brahms' 2nd (Giulini and the VPO) -final movement which I find so exhilarating.....

early this morning on a walk along the coast and in the sun I listened to the recently released additional concerts 'Its too late to stop now' by Van the man.......

in both instances the music adds (as music so frequently does) to my own personal experience......

If my associates don't get it then it is their loss....at 58 I am past trying (usually in vain) to convert anyone, while I will continue to enjoy music as much as ever.......

A great example is the number of 'friends' who with little real evidence dismiss Pat Metheny as 'wallpaper' (whatever that means)and as for advising them to listen to Myaskovsky's 27th...well it is just not happening!

conclusion?....well it can be a really solitary experience, and is that such a bad thing after all?


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## Guest (Jul 5, 2018)

I haven't met many people who don't like it.....

.....all my friends like it to some degree......

It seems like classical music is just a part of life and has a different role to everyone. The other day I met someone who had just landed in Melbourne from Indonesia for a couple of weeks (friend's wedding and staying for a holiday). He needed to know which tram stop was his and I was heading in the same direction so we got talking about a variety of things, music included. Turns out his dad ran a choir and classical music (mainly choral music) happened to be just part of the music he heard growing up, and he was curious to find more music to listen to.

Even when I was in primary school I was lucky enough to have friends who did indeed enjoy classical music; one of my best friends particularly loved Bach's double violin concerto and I actually first became interested in baroque music because of him. Even people who weren't close friends of mine occasionally went to see an opera just because it was something to enjoy. I haven't heard from these people in many years so it wouldn't surprise me if they tend to listen to other stuff more these days but it would surprise me if many people 'hate' classical music.

Perhaps my upbringing was weird, perhaps the crowd I'm surrounded by is a weird crowd that for some reason really values the arts and enjoys it with an open mind.


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## Manxfeeder (Oct 19, 2010)

jim prideaux said:


> Conclusion?....well it can be a really solitary experience, and is that such a bad thing after all?


As an ex- and failed classical evangelist, whether people listen or not doesn't bother me anymore. But I do tell them, you like classical music; you just don't know it yet. (Sometimes they have to wait for it to pop up in a song with Santana or in a movie soundtrack).

But as to music being a solitary experience, that's the case in my house. My wife likes British detective shows. I like classical music. At times we retreat to our private spaces, not for very long. But that's not a bad thing. As Kahlil Gabran said, Let there be spaces in your togetherness.


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## Ingélou (Feb 10, 2013)

shirime said:


> I haven't met many people who don't like it.....
> 
> .....all my friends like it to some degree......
> 
> ...


Maybe *lucky* would be the more appropriate epithet.


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## Guest (Jul 5, 2018)

Ingélou said:


> Maybe *lucky* would be the more appropriate epithet.


You're probably right


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## Enthusiast (Mar 5, 2016)

Manxfeeder said:


> But as to music being a solitary experience, that's the case in my house. My wife likes British detective shows. I like classical music. At times we retreat to our private spaces, not for very long. But that's not a bad thing. As Kahlil Gabran said, Let there be spaces in your togetherness.


Ah, I'm lucky there. My wife - who comes from a country with practically no western classical music life at all (Bangladesh) - has become a real and genuine fan. She is upstairs now listening to Bernstein's Beethoven 1 - quite loud so I'm listening to it, too.


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## Guest (Jul 5, 2018)

Enthusiast said:


> Ah, I'm lucky there. My wife - who comes from a country with practically no western classical music life at all (Bangladesh) - has become a real and genuine fan. She is upstairs now listening to Bernstein's Beethoven 1 - quite loud so I'm listening to it, too.


Ooh this is good! My girlfriend and I are both fans in rather different ways. She's a law student, I'm a music student, she regularly attends operas, I regularly attend orchestral and new music concerts, her parents love classical music and have a large CD collection, mine do not have a large CD collection and don't listen to classical music regularly.


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## Enthusiast (Mar 5, 2016)

shirime said:


> Ooh this is good! My girlfriend and I are both fans in rather different ways. She's a law student, I'm a music student, she regularly attends operas, I regularly attend orchestral and new music concerts, her parents love classical music and have a large CD collection, mine do not have a large CD collection and don't listen to classical music regularly.


An excellent match! My wife was a judo champion - something I'm afraid I never managed to learn from her - and I think differences like that are excellent for relationships.


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## mbhaub (Dec 2, 2016)

When someone says they hate classical music, I just tell that that there's some I hate, too. But any music that has been performed thousands of time over hundreds of year must have something going for it - the problem is yours. Long after U2 or Beyoncé are forgotten, Beethoven, Brahms, Mahler and Shostakovich will still be played, listened to and loved.

It really comes down to personal taste and upbringing. I hate the boredom of watching a lot of sports: American football, European football, hockey, basketball, baseball (snore....) and worst of all, golf. Yet I am thrilled to death watching rodeo and bull riding events, which our local paper won't even cover in its sports section.


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## eugeneonagain (May 14, 2017)

It's better to make new friends who _do_ like classical music rather than trying to convert the friends you already have. I've met people at concerts and music festivals and at the conservatory with whom I can talk about music.

When I asked my ex girlfriend if I could play some classical music (in my own house!) while we were eating on the terrace, she assented; assuming I suppose that it would be something light and gentle. I put on Ginastera's concerto for strings and she became increasingly stressed to the point where I had to turn it off. She remarked: "it was making me _afraid_. It was upsetting". And I was thinking that this is part of the emotional experience of listening to music, not just music for shopping to.

This is the usual problem; a huge number of people think the 'classical' listener is listening to an endless loop of _Elvira Madigan_, or 'music for relaxing to'. They want something more exciting, but when that comes along it's either too complicated, too long or (as above) "upsetting".

This is why I limit discussion to people I know are interested in such a thing. However, when people come to my house, I listen to what I want to listen to, within reason. One guest who claimed not to like classical sat through Beethoven's 3rd symphony and Greig's piano concerto while we were busy and afterwards said he enjoyed them....


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## MarkW (Feb 16, 2015)

Outwait them. And if one or both of you die before he comes around, so be it.


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## Enthusiast (Mar 5, 2016)

dogen said:


> You're probably right, although I only became interested in my early 50s.


How did that come about, Dogen? There must be a story there somewhere.


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## Fredx2098 (Jun 24, 2018)

It depends on how they react to it. I had an ex-friend who would always say that classical music is just boring background music. On the other hand, my less cynical friends would say that they don't personally understand it, but they do understand the talent it takes to compose and perform it. Those friends now love classical music (almost) as much as I do. The vast majority of music I like is not liked by the average person, so I have plenty of experience with people not liking music I like. I don't try to force people to listen to what I like, but I ask people if they would mind me showing them examples of music I like from styles they aren't familiar with. If they don't like it, I take that as par for the course and don't let it affect me, but if they do like it, it makes me so happy!

I'm a youngin', so I'm familiar with the average taste of my "peers". At least in America, it seems like people are being brainwashed by pop music and it's causing the average attention span to diminish, making it so any song that isn't 3 minutes of instant gratification is boring. If someone does like pop music, I'm not going to try to stop them, but I'll try to suggest things to broaden their horizons. If they don't take kindly to it then they're just not my type of person.

It also seems common for young people who are unfamiliar with classical music to lump it all together with the handful of extremely popular pieces used on TV and in movies. If that's the case and they're pop "fans" (or brainwashees) then they're probably already too far gone.


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## EdwardBast (Nov 25, 2013)

I hope this doesn't disqualify me from the thread, but I don't have friends like that.


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## Guest (Jul 5, 2018)

Enthusiast said:


> How did that come about, Dogen? There must be a story there somewhere.


Possibly. There was probably the potential, I'd always been a fan of the music of classical-influnced prog rockers such as Keith Emerson, Robert Fripp and Rick Wakeman.

Anyhoo, I bought my mum a DAB radio. After a couple of years it was apparent she was never listening to it (she had dementia) so I brought it home and put it in the kitchen, set it to a rock station and used it for background music. I was underwhelmed by the rock station so decided to switch it to a classical station. It was then I discovered I liked quite a lot of what I heard. My bank account went downhill from there really.


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## TurnaboutVox (Sep 22, 2013)

I have a friend or two and a son who are keen on classical music and a daughter who likes opera, though her main interest has always been in rock and musical theatre. That is sufficient in real life, but it does illustrate how important an online community such as this forum is to many people.


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## Thomyum2 (Apr 18, 2018)

Enthusiast said:


> Ah, I'm lucky there. My wife - who comes from a country with practically no western classical music life at all (Bangladesh) - has become a real and genuine fan. She is upstairs now listening to Bernstein's Beethoven 1 - quite loud so I'm listening to it, too.


Hey, we something in common there - my partner grew up in the Philippines and similarly without music background, but has grown to enjoy it tremendously. In spite of having no formal musical education or training, he has a remarkable ear and often is able to point things out to me that I miss, or share his impressions of a piece in a way that sheds a whole new perspective on it for me.


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## Aloevera (Oct 1, 2017)

I just play it when i can without asking lol


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## Barbebleu (May 17, 2015)

I just tell them that they clearly have van Gogh's ear for music!


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## Iota (Jun 20, 2018)

I've had a few friends (including a brother) for whom classical music was every bit as important as it is for me. But from time to time others enquire and want to know about it, and ask for recommendations, some of those end up enjoying it a lot. Like Shirime I found many people have been interested and open to it, even if they didn't end up taking it very far. 

Coincidentally, just recently a friend, some thirty years after I first suggested Sibelius to her, was talking about how Sibelius 5th changed her life. 

Strangely I never fully enjoyed recommending things as there were just so many wonders, I was never quite sure which to begin with. 
I did turn my Mum (who never listened to any music) on to David Bowie. Just. Nice to feel you've given something back ..


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## Larkenfield (Jun 5, 2017)

:"What do you say to friends who hate classical music?"

Nothing. I keep my interest to myself. Never let others put a whammy on something you happen to love because of their ignorance or insensitivity. Never... Never give them the chance and keep your interest private. But if they bring it up first and happen to be curious, it's an opportunity for you to discuss and perhaps share a few favorite recordings along the way. Waiting for the other person to show an interest gives _you_ the leverage needed to discuss the subject on your own terms without redicule because _they_ made the first move. Haters can only be convinced of its worth by not being coerced or convinced by you. They must come to it, discover it willingly. 
:wave:


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## Olias (Nov 18, 2010)

I was in a conversation once where I mentioned I was recently at the opera. A friend said they hated opera. I asked her to name three operas they've seen. There was silence. My point was that if you can't state specific reasons why you hate something as a result of actually trying it, then the statement has no validity.


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## chill782002 (Jan 12, 2017)

dogen said:


> Possibly. There was probably the potential, I'd always been a fan of the music of classical-influnced prog rockers such as Keith Emerson, Robert Fripp and Rick Wakeman.
> 
> Anyhoo, I bought my mum a DAB radio. After a couple of years it was apparent she was never listening to it (she had dementia) so I brought it home and put it in the kitchen, set it to a rock station and used it for background music. I was underwhelmed by the rock station so decided to switch it to a classical station. It was then I discovered I liked quite a lot of what I heard. My bank account went downhill from there really.


Interesting. I actually did things the other way round, grew up with classical music (my father is a big fan) and then discovered Yes, ELP, King Crimson, Genesis etc through that in my early teens, which then rapidly led to 60s/70s hard rock, grunge, thrash etc.

Ironically, I think developing an interest in music like that helped me to appreciate more complex, less immediately obvious late romantic / modernist "classical" works later on in life, stuff that my Dad (Beethoven all the way) would have run a mile from and which I certainly never heard as a child.


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## mathisdermaler (Mar 29, 2017)

Talk about the sliver of pop music that we both genuinely like then feel depressed that I have no one to talk about Bruckner with, lol.


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## Enthusiast (Mar 5, 2016)

Some of my interest in these questions concerned what we feel and do when people do not like some of the same music as us. Extreme example of this might be the (regular, it seems) "wars" between those who feel that atonal music is a crime against humanity and those who feel that it is the only music that is interesting and, also, the discussions we often seem to have about whether this or that great composer is really great or merely rubbish. Some of us - me included - weigh in on these discussions that are going on _within_ the classical music loving community and would, I think, do it face-to-face as well as on a forum.

But, for me, when it comes to people I like a lot (or even love - my daughter!) who just don't get/like any classical music, I might make a few suggestions for things they might enjoy (usually disguised as sharing a wonderful experience _I_ had had) but do usually feel that my advocacy is doomed from the start. Even when I was (much) younger and we would play rock and jazz music to each other, I never tried to convert any friends to classical. A very few avant garde composers - Stockhausen, certainly, because he was known to have inspired Can - did sometimes get onto our turntables but this was not common. Mind you, my friends then tended to like music that was "intelligent" but fairly raw (Dylan more than prog rock). I think the route from prog to classical is an easier one.


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## DeepR (Apr 13, 2012)

That they are uncultured troglodytes.


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## Fredx2098 (Jun 24, 2018)

Enthusiast said:


> Some of my interest in these questions concerned what we feel and do when people do not like some of the same music as us. Extreme example of this might be the (regular, it seems) "wars" between those who feel that atonal music is a crime against humanity and those who feel that it is the only music that is interesting and, also, the discussions we often seem to have about whether this or that great composer is really great or merely rubbish. Some of us - me included - weigh in on these discussions that are going on _within_ the classical music loving community and would, I think, do it face-to-face as well as on a forum.


I don't think I've witnessed anyone saying that atonal music is the only music that's interesting. I hope that isn't a reference to me or people agreeing with me. I'm not saying that Bach and Beethoven are rubbish, I'm just giving examples of how subjective the enjoyment of music is. I've seen a lot of aggressive insulting of atonal music though.


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## Enthusiast (Mar 5, 2016)

Fredx2098 said:


> I don't think I've witnessed anyone saying that atonal music is the only music that's interesting. I hope that isn't a reference to me or people agreeing with me. I'm not saying that Bach and Beethoven are rubbish, I'm just giving examples of how subjective the enjoyment of music is. I've seen a lot of aggressive insulting of atonal music though.


No, no! Certainly not to you, Fredx! And not that recent, possibly not even on this forum. But I have seen people make such claims quite often - somewhere and at some point.


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## Fredx2098 (Jun 24, 2018)

Enthusiast said:


> No, no! Certainly not to you, Fredx! And not that recent, possibly not even on this forum. But I have seen people make such claims quite often - somewhere and at some point.


Oh, sorry for making assumptions. I can definitely imagine elitists of either opinion, though most of the limited number of people with advanced musical skill who I've spoken with (outside the forum) seem to favor tonal music.


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## Enthusiast (Mar 5, 2016)

Fredx2098 said:


> Oh, sorry for making assumptions. I can definitely imagine elitists of either opinion, though most of the limited number of people with advanced musical skill who I've spoken with (outside the forum) seem to favor tonal music.


Yep. That's the way it goes. I get it and can remember being more or less among them (except for a few pieces, mostly Webern and Berg). But that was some time ago. Relatively current music has been important to me for quite a while and I do feel (with a very few exceptions) that the most rewarding music being written now is atonal. It was that that led me back to earlier atonal music. In general I feel that the days of tonal music's "dominance" ended with Britten and Shostakovich. Even Stravinsky turned to atonality in his later days.


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## runssical (Jan 20, 2017)

I've played my music for someone once while driving and they said they got nervous.


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## Enthusiast (Mar 5, 2016)

runssical said:


> I've played my music for someone once while driving and they said they got nervous.


It presumably wasn't your driving?


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## vmartell (Feb 9, 2017)

To be truthful, I call them philistines, nekulturny dummies and treat their taste condescendingly and with extreme disdain, calling it trash. 

You mileage might vary - I think my non-classical friends and family either love me very much or completely ignore me. 

v


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## Guest (Jul 14, 2018)

_Banause_ is another good word...........


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## Guest (Jul 14, 2018)

I don't have any friends who hate CM, as far as I know: it's not a topic of conversation that comes up often.


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## Guest (Jul 14, 2018)

MacLeod said:


> I don't have any friends who hate CM, as far as I know: it's not a topic of conversation that comes up often.


Yes, it's always best to avoid contentious topics.


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## Sid James (Feb 7, 2009)

Enthusiast said:


> We must all have friends who feel that sitting through even a 15 minute piece that transports us to heaven would be a torture. Do you try to convert them? Do you convince them to give it a try? Or do you just avoid the question with them? There are also similar questions about friends who like some classical music but not your favourite composer or a composer you think is especially worthwhile.


Classical music has a highbrow image, although not so much today as in the past. I tend only to get into discussions of music with close friends or family. The primary concern is being lumped together with classical listeners who are snobs, even amongst their own. There is a degree of trust involved in revealing our musical tastes, in being accepting of others and comfortable with sharing your own.

Nevertheless, music seems much less tribal today than it was in my youth. Having read John Adams' autobiography Hallelujah Junction, I really liked how he described the tendency of today's young people to be listeners of everything rather than limited to one or two genres. He gives the example of his son who, based on all the different music he has on his ipod, cannot be categorised as one type of listener or another. I think this can only be good.


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## Larkenfield (Jun 5, 2017)

. . . . . . . . . .


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## JeffD (May 8, 2017)

I tell them to hold the onions.


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## Guest (Jul 15, 2018)

dogen said:


> Yes, it's always best to avoid contentious topics.


Well, I woudn't say I've got a lot of friends anyway. My wife is my number one, and she will listen patiently, and accompany me to the odd concert, so she doesn't hate CM. I also play in a quiz league, and two of the four others in our squad like CM - but it rarely crops up.

Oddly, the only place where anyone talks about hate, or where it is contentious - is here!


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## Triple A (Jul 15, 2018)

Well, you can try to invite them to some concerts where there's a kind of fusion between classical and urban music and poetry such as this coming concert.

https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/in-o...ve-classical-music-poetry-tickets-46492942643


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## Triple A (Jul 15, 2018)

or also an orchestral concert of film music production, this a good introduction for people who don't like and don't know classical music.


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## Triple A (Jul 15, 2018)

or also an orchestral concert of film music production, this a good introduction for people who don't like and don't know classical music.


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## Roger Knox (Jul 19, 2017)

With people I'm close to I try to find some aspect or connection to classical music that they'll respond to. If they say they hate classical music I won't press the matter. In my experience, usually that's an attitude they learned growing up, or it's the result of bad experience(s) with classical music. Generally I make an effort with people who show a spark of interest that might become a light.


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## Bulldog (Nov 21, 2013)

A few years ago I had to attend a real estate conference in the Dallas/Fort Worth area. In addition to being together at the conference, we all spent a lot of time going out to dinner together, drinking at bars and even showing up for a Dolly Parton event. Best I could tell, everyone was a big-time country music fan. They would shoot the breeze about their favorite country artists, groups and songs. Eventually, one of them asked me - " You're not saying anything, Don. Don't you have country favorites?"

I replied that I didn't identify with country music and preferred classical. The general response was that it was okay because I grew up in the Boston area.


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## GraemeG (Jun 30, 2009)

I might understand someone saying they find CM boring (probably because they've never really listened to it). Half the the time people probably don't know what you're referring to. Elevator music? Modern Mantovani or equivalent? But I figure that the sheer live pulse of an orchestral concert - if you can sit close enough - should interest anyone. 
I think of the huge number of blockbuster films - from Star Wars though LoTR through Pirates of the... - all of which relied on grand (if cliched) orchestral scores and top-drawer visuals to hook their audiences. Well, I'll back Holst, Stravinsky, Tchaikovsky, Dvorak over Williams, Zimmer & Shore any day of the week when it comes to emotional response to music.
Ambivalent responses to CM are mostly due to ignorance/apathy, I reckon.
I sometimes wonder how many people there are out there who think they're not great music fans - or find it a bit passe (especially as they get older) - who just need someone to plonk them down in front of Beethoven 7 or something to make them sit up and go go "Wow! I had no idea..."
And a whole new world of grown-up music - aimed at your head, not your hips - opens up...
Graeme


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## Larkenfield (Jun 5, 2017)

Perhaps those hypnotized by monolithic pop music need a similar wake-up call to discover the promised land of CM.


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## Guest (Jul 21, 2018)

GraemeG said:


> I might understand someone saying they find CM boring (probably because they've never really listened to it). Half the the time people probably don't know what you're referring to. Elevator music? Modern Mantovani or equivalent? But I figure that the sheer live pulse of an orchestral concert - if you can sit close enough - should interest anyone.
> I think of the huge number of blockbuster films - from Star Wars though LoTR through Pirates of the... - all of which relied on grand (if cliched) orchestral scores and top-drawer visuals to hook their audiences. Well, I'll back Holst, Stravinsky, Tchaikovsky, Dvorak over Williams, Zimmer & Shore any day of the week when it comes to emotional response to music.
> Ambivalent responses to CM are mostly due to ignorance/apathy, I reckon.
> I sometimes wonder how many people there are out there who think they're not great music fans - or find it a bit passe (especially as they get older) - who just need someone to plonk them down in front of Beethoven 7 or something to make them sit up and go go "Wow! I had no idea..."
> ...


I don't think many people know who Mantovani is, though, aside from people who follow EIC and ensembles like that......


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## Dan Ante (May 4, 2016)

Roger Knox said:


> With people I'm close to I try to find some aspect or connection to classical music that they'll respond to. If they say they hate classical music I won't press the matter. In my experience, usually that's an attitude they learned growing up, or it's the result of bad experience(s) with classical music. Generally I make an effort with people who show a spark of interest that might become a light.


I do the same it is amazing what can come from a simple question such as "do you like classical music" quite a few years ago I was in my local library and took my book to the counter to get stamped and the lady said "I see you like classical music" we had a short chat and that was that. 
Later in the week a man came to see me at work, introduced himself and said his wife had spoken to me at the library, From that lucky meeting we got together every couple of weeks for an evening of CM on Vinyl and a new thing called a CD he had a CD player and a good Hi Fi set up, to make a long story short we eventually formed a music group that met once a month we took it in turns as host, it grew from two members to eight over a couple of years today we are down to six due to some dying, our age is from about Fiftyfive upwards with three in the eighties the evening consists of music, nibbles and of course a glass or two of red.


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## DaveM (Jun 29, 2015)

shirime said:


> I don't think many people know who Mantovani is...


You'd be surprised...


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## Guest (Jul 22, 2018)

DaveM said:


> You'd be surprised...


Well, when I search his name on youtube the first thing that comes up is this:






And I am pretty sure Ensemble InterContemporain is more famous than Mantovani for the amount of recordings they have released on the more 'mainstream' classical labels.


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## Hugo9000 (Aug 6, 2018)

I don't bother trying to convert my friends to classical music. Instead, I give copies of favorite music to their children, who have invariably loved it, to the annoyance of those friends! Is that being passive/aggressive? haha


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## Dan Ante (May 4, 2016)

Hugo9000 said:


> I don't bother trying to convert my friends to classical music. Instead, I give copies of favorite music to their children, who have invariably loved it, to the annoyance of those friends! Is that being passive/aggressive? haha


Do you mean you copy your CDs for them?


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## Hugo9000 (Aug 6, 2018)

Dan Ante said:


> Do you mean you copy your CDs for them?


No, gifts are always new, unopened CDs. I've purchased many copies of my favorite recordings over the years as gifts. At least 20 of Leontyne Price's Madama Butterfly, and nearly that many copies of a few other favorites like her Christmas album, and some Rachmaninov, and Handel's Messiah (Pinnock/The English Concert and Choir).

I'm very happy to pay for things that have brought me joy.


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## Dan Ante (May 4, 2016)

Hugo9000 said:


> No, gifts are always new, unopened CDs. I've purchased many copies of my favorite recordings over the years as gifts. At least 20 of Leontyne Price's Madama Butterfly, and nearly that many copies of a few other favorites like her Christmas album, and some Rachmaninov, and Handel's Messiah (Pinnock/The English Concert and Choir).
> 
> I'm very happy to pay for things that have brought me joy.


Well played sir!...............


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## endelbendel (Jul 7, 2018)

If they can't be still and at peace within to listen well to the music, you can be sure they are not listening when you talk. Sh'ma.


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## petruculin (Aug 10, 2018)

I would suggest to them to listen to Chopin's Nocturne. It is an easy way to start discovering classical music, if they do not like it out of... let's say ignorance. Otherwise, nobody would expect them to like all the classical music.


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## Varick (Apr 30, 2014)

JeffD said:


> I tell them to hold the onions.


LMAO!!!



Dan Ante said:


> I do the same it is amazing what can come from a simple question such as "do you like classical music" quite a few years ago I was in my local library and took my book to the counter to get stamped and the lady said "I see you like classical music" we had a short chat and that was that.
> Later in the week a man came to see me at work, introduced himself and said his wife had spoken to me at the library, From that lucky meeting we got together every couple of weeks for an evening of CM on Vinyl and a new thing called a CD he had a CD player and a good Hi Fi set up, to make a long story short we eventually formed a music group that met once a month we took it in turns as host, it grew from two members to eight over a couple of years today we are down to six due to some dying, our age is from about Fiftyfive upwards with three in the eighties the evening consists of music, nibbles and of course a glass or two of red.


I hope you realize how lucky you were/are to have that experience. I would give a lot to be able to find kindred spirits like that in person. I have found that with cigars and a few other hobbies of mine, but never with classical music (one of my greatest passions in life). Someone above mentioned the importance of this web site.

It is this precise reason I sought, found, and signed up to this site. The new things I have heard and learned are immeasurable.

I never talk about classical music unless I am talking with someone about music or if they ask me. It rarely comes up and I have resolved that it will be an activity I will just have to enjoy in solitude. But I find there is always an ache in the heart when you can not find other's who share a passion of yours.

I have recently however, re established contact with an old friend of mine who was a high school drop out. He taught himself guitar when I had met him and when he found out that I had a masters in music asked me what I thought of his playing (It was rock). I told him I thought he had A LOT of talent, but he needed to hone that talent with proper/formal training. I encouraged learning classical guitar, because after that, he would be able to play anything.

Long story longer: That was almost 20 years ago. He has since earned a masters in music from the Manhattan School of Music and he is an excellent classical guitarist. We have started exchanging music once again like we did almost 20 years ago.

V


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## Dan Ante (May 4, 2016)

Varick said:


> I hope you realize how lucky you were/are to have that experience. I would give a lot to be able to find kindred spirits like that in person.


Yes it was a stroke of luck but when you think about it how many people are there that are in the same position, must be a lot why not take out a classified add and see if you get any replies and if not then repeat it what is there to loose. I should add we also have people that come now and again they may not have a Hi Fi system so could not host but that doesn't matter.


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## bfBrian (Aug 12, 2018)

As an audio enthusiast, I have learned that most people don't listen to music. Music is something they put on in the background, while they do something else: drive a car, do chores, exercise, work, etc. I wonder if people who seldom give music their full attention will appreciate classical music. I suspect they wont, but it would be interesting to hear others opinions.


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## Star (May 27, 2017)

I think it's important that people like music. Music is something that can enrich our lives and it's important that people like some form of music. If they like music different to me then that's fine. I don't even like all forms of classical music so I don't expect anyone else to have the same taste as me


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## licorice stick (Nov 24, 2014)

I know five musicology graduate students at a prestigious university (through an ensemble), and only one of them knows much of anything about classical music. The others can stump me on music after Steve Reich and music in mass media and non-western music and the perception of music by disadvantaged groups. And I have no interest in learning about any of those subjects or trying in vain to make them care about the bulk of classical music.


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## Enthusiast (Mar 5, 2016)

bfBrian said:


> As an audio enthusiast, I have learned that most people don't listen to music. Music is something they put on in the background, while they do something else: drive a car, do chores, exercise, work, etc. I wonder if people who seldom give music their full attention will appreciate classical music. I suspect they wont, but it would be interesting to hear others opinions.


I agree but at the same time know that listening to classical music while doing something else can still be some fairly focused listening. Often it is my favourite way of listening and it is particularly useful for getting acquainted with music that it very unfamiliar. It sort of creeps into your consciousness without your needing to make sense of it. You might need to know enough music to have some sort of "internal model" of musical forms and so on to make it work. On the other had "listening with concentration" _may _be a bit of a myth. Especially if you don't know technical aspects of music what does your mind think of while you are concentrating?


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## Tallisman (May 7, 2017)

I call them uncultured plebeians, spit on them, and then tootle off to listen to some Haydn.


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## Tallisman (May 7, 2017)

Hugo9000 said:


> I don't bother trying to convert my friends to classical music. Instead, I give copies of favorite music to their children, who have invariably loved it, to the annoyance of those friends! Is that being passive/aggressive? haha


Good move. Get 'em before they get irreversibly corrupted by pop music.


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## Pjotr (May 2, 2018)

Most people don't know whether or not they like classical music. It's very difficult to convince somebody of the beauty of it, simply because most pieces demand multiple active listening sessions. I've recently got to know Mendelssohns 6th string quartet. I had to listen at least 10 times to discover all the melodies and to find out how strikingly beautifull it is. If I ask friends to listen they usually say "nah..." after about 10 seconds and that's it. And then I ask myself : "how do they know so fast..." I thought I had found the key to success when I first heard the Adagio from Schuberts String Quintet. It overwhelmed me during the first listening session. It was so easy for the ear and still it is inexhaustible. I tried it with some friends. I was sure of my luck, this couldn't go wrong. I organised the right setting. Everybody sitting, all quiet, no children running around and no kitchen sounds, press play and the well-known first tones of the adagio filled my living room. I was just about to tell them that Schubert really opens the gates of heaven in this masterpiece but luckily I rediscovered my presence of mind just before uttering such silly statements as I immediately saw it meant nothing to them. Maybe they just sat there to be polite and probably they stopped listening after 30 seconds wondering how long this was going to take. Today, I never risk negative commentary on music I really like. When friends come over I safely choose my eighties playlist  But after they've left...it's time for the Schuberts and Mendelssohns of this world.


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## Euler (Dec 3, 2017)

licorice stick said:


> I know five musicology graduate students at a prestigious university (through an ensemble), and only one of them knows much of anything about classical music. The others can stump me on music after Steve Reich and music in mass media and non-western music and the perception of music by disadvantaged groups. And I have no interest in learning about any of those subjects or trying in vain to make them care about the bulk of classical music.


What about non-Western classical musics though, aren't you curious about them?

None of my friends hate classical, apart from the Eeyorish timpanist in my orchestra. Most pals from the world at large are indifferent to it and a few love it.


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## Jacck (Dec 24, 2017)

Enthusiast said:


> I agree but at the same time know that listening to classical music while doing something else can still be some fairly focused listening. Often it is my favourite way of listening and it is particularly useful for getting acquainted with music that it very unfamiliar. It sort of creeps into your consciousness without your needing to make sense of it. You might need to know enough music to have some sort of "internal model" of musical forms and so on to make it work. On the other had "listening with concentration" _may _be a bit of a myth. Especially if you don't know technical aspects of music what does your mind think of while you are concentrating?


this is my experience too and I often do it that way, ie I play new pieces while working and concentrating on something else. I subconsciously absorb the music, it becomes familiar and then I enjoy the music much more. I do it that way also with opera. For example Strauss operas - Salome or Electra. I first listened to both operas a couple of times as background music while working, and not really worrying about the lyrics. Only after several listenings did I follow the libretto. Operas are definitely the toughest genre of classical music.


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## Razumovskymas (Sep 20, 2016)

janxharris said:


> My friends response to hearing my favourite piece:
> 
> _...to be honest, it didn't do a lot for me. I found it a little dull and generic, the kind of generic background music you would hear in a film, but not the main theme score. Just uninspiring, for me, didn't excite me at all..._


Which piece was that?


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## janxharris (May 24, 2010)

Razumovskymas said:


> Which piece was that?


Sibelius's 7th Symphony.

We're still great friends by the way


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## Dan Ante (May 4, 2016)

Star said:


> I think it's important that people like music. Music is something that can enrich our lives and it's important that people like some form of music. If they like music different to me then that's fine. I don't even like all forms of classical music so I don't expect anyone else to have the same taste as me


I have friend who is a classical music lover his wife is a fantastic artist "drawing and painting" but does not like any form of music??


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## licorice stick (Nov 24, 2014)

Euler said:


> What about non-Western classical musics though, aren't you curious about them?
> 
> None of my friends hate classical, apart from the Eeyorish timpanist in my orchestra. Most pals from the world at large are indifferent to it and a few love it.


I enjoy Balkan folk music, klezmer and, to a much lesser extent, Indian classical music. Everything else I've heard that's considered "classical" is as appealing as the noise that normal people listen to.


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## eljr (Aug 8, 2015)

Tallisman said:


> Good move. Get 'em before they get irreversibly corrupted by pop music.


Wasn't classical music popular music of it's day?


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## Beethoven14 (Feb 14, 2019)

Hear from 11:07-11:37.


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## Fredrikalansson (Jan 29, 2019)

When people find out I listen to classical music, the response is usually "Isn't that a bit narrow? Don't you listen to anything else?" My response is: "Hmm...let's see. I listen to music from the middle ages to the present day. That's about 1000 years. I listen to music written by composers in five different continents. I listen to choral music, solo music, orchestral music, chamber music and Opera. I listen to music written in over a dozen different languages. I don't see how this is narrow. By the way, what music do you listen to?"


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## Larkenfield (Jun 5, 2017)

I rarely bring up the subject with family and friends and usually keep my interest to myself as something private, sometimes even sacred, because it represents a form of healing and self-renewal. But there have been times when I discovered that a friend was interested and we had interesting conversations and exchanged music... all quite unexpected and delightful.


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## flamencosketches (Jan 4, 2019)

I just laugh in their faces and call them uncultured Philistines and get on with my day. :devil:

No, seriously, I don't care to influence the musical preferences of others. With the majority of my friends, we share common ground in music outside of classical anyway. It would be nice if I had some friends who listened to classical music, but what can you do. We're a dying breed.


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## Guest (Jul 27, 2019)

MacLeod said:


> I don't have any friends who hate CM, as far as I know: it's not a topic of conversation that comes up often.


I don't have any who love it either.

Just me and my invisible friend.


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