# The Apprentice Contortionist..



## Ingélou (Feb 10, 2013)

I'm getting very discouraged about the piano since moving from all the froggy-and-kitty children's books to the adult tutor. It's because Rho is upping the ante. Not only must I play the notes right and sit correctly, but I must learn the correct technique with my hands. The first advice - to let my wrists relax between chords so that I don't get tension - took a few days to pick up, but I think I have.

But now a whole lot of other advice has been given to me. I am making the left hand too loud and dominant, so I must press harder with my right hand fingers and less hard with my left hand fingers.
I must lean my elbow and shoulder in the direction of the notes when playing sharps and flats, or my fingers will go stiff.
I must pay attention to the dynamics.
When playing my scale - my first and so far only scale, the white-note C major - I must prepare my thumb * before* I move it, or else the transition will sound jerky.

It reminds me of nothing so much as the advice given to Painless Potter (played by Bob Hope) in the film *The Paleface*, 1948. He is going to face a gunman and the townspeople want to help. He paces up the street repeating the litany to himself:
*"He draws to the left so lean to the right."
"There's a wind from the east - better aim to the west."
"He crouches when he shoots so stand on your toes."*

Inevitably, he gets it all garbled.

Rho has explained to me that it's important to get the technique right because bad habits are hard to correct; she has also said that now that I've started on scales, I could order the Grade One Exam Material and get to work on it, if I want.

But the truth is, I'm feeling discouraged. 

The original idea of learning piano was to supplement my knowledge of music to help my fiddling. I have said to Fiddle Guru that I will take the Grade 4 exam in the summer. I like to do about 2 hours fiddle practice a day; I only have the time and energy for half an hour's piano practice. If I took exams, I'd have to find more time. And the point of taking the grade 4 violin exam is to improve in confidence; I don't think I'll bother with grade 5. But taking a piano exam won't lead anywhere and the added pressure will probably make me nervous.

The other thing is, I am in my Third Age, and even when I was young, it took me time to pick up physical skills that needed separate co-ordination. I never *did* get the knack of patting myself on the head while rubbing my tummy at the same time. :lol:

*Remember when you were a child, and your mother wanted to stop you losing one of your gloves? So she fastened each mitt to a piece of elastic and passed it through your coat sleeves? That's what my piano hands are like - unable to work independently, with the constricting cord that joins them passing through my ageing grey matter. *

I looked at Rho's instructions for this week's practice in my notebook. The scale - yes, I must learn that properly.

The piece of music - I must try to learn the knack of playing more loudly with my right hand than my left. It's really hard though; if I bang with my right hand, I bang with my left. If I try to pussyfoot with my left fingers, I pussyfoot with my right, willy-nilly. 
I don't think I can simultaneously pick up the knack of leaning into the notes with my elbow.
Or concentrate on the dynamics at the same time as trying to get different volumes with each hand.

I spent a lot of time awake last night wondering if I really want to go on with the piano. I feel that I must, at least until I have taken my violin exam, because:
*a) Rho is my accompanist in that exam, and I don't want to offend her.
b) Rho can help me with the aural tests for the violin exam.
c) All the sight-reading that I'm doing for piano is helping to improve that skill, which wasn't great before. 
d) I have nearly learned all the notes in the bass clef - one of my objectives - and by summer I may have a few chords under my belt too.
e) Rho is Taggart's teacher for his piano exam, also in Summer, so I don't want to offend her on his behalf either.
*

But I definitely *don't* want to take any piano exams! And I think that I just won't have the time or energy to learn two instruments and achieve a satisfactory standard.

The only problem is - how do I play the quiet waiting game of learning with Rho without admitting that my heart isn't in it? And how do I finally duck out of piano lessons with her?










I am not very good at play-acting, so I have a horrible feeling that it is going to come tumbling out.

I am a little worried about my horoscope in the back of today's newspaper: 
It says, *'Do not be afraid to give up on a project you no longer believe in...'*

But that's just it - I *am* afraid!


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