# Table manners



## TxllxT (Mar 2, 2011)

My wife follows xxx video bloggers. One woman living in North California (she comes from originally from Jekatarinaburg) tells that Americans are _psych_ with cleaning the table as soon as possible. First the dishes and cups are washed by hand, after that they are being re-cleaned in the dishwasher. The woman's American husband cannot understand that she with her girlfriend drink five cups of tea without having the cups cleaned up in between. In Russia the habit is to sit as long as possible at the table, that is filled as on the photo:










So all the food stands there for hours...

Please, describe your table manners, (with photos if possible...)


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## Bulldog (Nov 21, 2013)

1. I put all the food on the table.
2. We sit down and eat (utensils provided).
3. About 20 minutes later, we do the clean-up.


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## SarahNorthman (Nov 19, 2014)

No elbows on the table here.


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## ArtMusic (Jan 5, 2013)

No TV watching during a big family dinner get together.


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## ldiat (Jan 27, 2016)

TxllxT said:


> My wife follows xxx video bloggers. One woman living in North California (she comes from originally from Jekatarinaburg) tells that Americans are _psych_ with cleaning the table as soon as possible. First the dishes and cups are washed by hand, after that they are being re-cleaned in the dishwasher. The woman's American husband cannot understand that she with her girlfriend drink five cups of tea without having the cups cleaned up in between. In Russia the habit is to sit as long as possible at the table, that is filled as on the photo:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


now to me, this looks like a buffet(picture}. a "family style" meal, i would think,would have some table ware. i can name almost all the prepared food. some look like doubles. wonder what the tomato crowns are filled with
table manners:formal, flatware for each course. eat in courses. wine with meal after dessert relax and talk for a while.
table manners: informal. prepare meal. watch jeoprady while eating on snack trays.... more wine clear dishes..more wine:cheers: 
all dishes and glasses are hand washed:clap:


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## Marinera (May 13, 2016)

no reading while eating


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## TwoFlutesOneTrumpet (Aug 31, 2011)

No sex while eating, is the rule in our house.


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## Bettina (Sep 29, 2016)

The table manners of composers:

Wagner never stopped talking (about himself, of course) while chewing. Cage always just sat there and left his food untouched. Bach often took bites of everything all at once, to create a counterpoint of flavors. 

Schoenberg was the worst! Sometimes he would try one bite of the main course--and then he couldn't come back to it until he had tried all 12 side dishes.


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## Pugg (Aug 8, 2014)

No phones on !
My rule number one!


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## David OByrne (Dec 1, 2016)

TwoFlutesOneTrumpet said:


> No sex while eating, is the rule in our house.


You sir, win the internet :lol:


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## Varick (Apr 30, 2014)

To the OP: It sounds like your post was more about table "tradition" or "culture" rather than manners.



TwoFlutesOneTrumpet said:


> No sex while eating, is the rule in our house.


Sometimes food can be a great aphrodisiac. 

I'm glad I'm not single and going on dates nowadays. If I was on a date and a woman pulled out her phone to look at her messages, or something other than what we were discussing, I would simply get up and walk out. I am astounded at the rudeness/lack of table manners pertaining to cell phones I see when I am out at a restaurant these days.

V


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## TxllxT (Mar 2, 2011)

Varick said:


> To the OP: It sounds like your post was more about table "tradition" or "culture" rather than manners.
> 
> Sometimes food can be a great aphrodisiac.
> 
> ...


Well, the manners involved in North California were the irresistible urge of the house lord to clean up, while the table guests are still enjoying themselves. My wife doesn't like, that I would put the post from the postbox on the table, because the table is somehow holy: only for food. But everyone feel free how to interpret 'manners'.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

My wife and I rarely eat meals together. She has her TV and I have mine. That's where we eat.

Also, I eat dinner early at 5 PM. She eats at 7:30 PM.

We communicate in the house by cell phone.


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## TwoFlutesOneTrumpet (Aug 31, 2011)

hpowders said:


> My wife and I rarely eat meals together. She has her TV and I have mine. That's where we eat.
> 
> Also, I eat dinner early at 5 PM. She eats at 7:30 PM.
> 
> We communicate in the house by cell phone.


And that is the recipe for a long-lasting marriage.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

TwoFlutesOneTrumpet said:


> And that is the recipe for a long-lasting marriage.


I am married to my music.


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## Varick (Apr 30, 2014)

TxllxT said:


> Well, the manners involved in North California were the irresistible urge of the house lord to clean up, while the table guests are still enjoying themselves. My wife doesn't like, that I would put the post from the postbox on the table, because the table is somehow holy: only for food. But everyone feel free how to interpret 'manners'.


Aha! I understand now. When my Mother-in-Law was healthy enough to cook and have everyone over for holiday dinners, she was the same way. It seemed like the "purpose" of having everyone over was so everyone could eat each course in the shortest amount time possible. I was barely swallowing the last bite of my dinner and she was already putting the pies and cakes out.

V


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

TwoFlutesOneTrumpet said:


> No sex while eating, is the rule in our house.


Now you know why I am so damn thin!


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## Dan Ante (May 4, 2016)

My wife cooks and then puts the meal onto the table, we eat, my wife clears the table and puts the dishes into the washing machine after a quick rinse, she then joins me in the lounge and brings my wine and two glasses, pours one each etc. we are just a normal married couple.


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## SarahNorthman (Nov 19, 2014)

hpowders said:


> Now you know why I am so damn thin!


Hahahahahahahaha!!!!!


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## Krummhorn (Feb 18, 2007)

We equally share the cooking and cleanup responsibilities for our meals. Just the two of us these days, ans sometimes we eat at the kitchen table (the dining table is reserved for when we are entertaining) or we eat on TV trays while watching our favorite shows. 

I was taught good table manners early on ... no elbows on the table ... my Dad would see one of us do that and he would jerk our arm straight into the air and then let go so that our elbow immediately dropped and hit the table with a hard thud. The dishes and glassware rattled ... and everyone leered at the offender ... we learned from those mistakes.


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## TwoFlutesOneTrumpet (Aug 31, 2011)

I don't know why "no elbows on table" is a desirable rule these days.

This is what I found about its orgin


> The "rule" goes back at least two millennia to the Wisdom of Sirach. It seems to boil down to this: while eating is necessary, how we eat is a custom or social ritual. In the case of elbows on the table, it appears guarded. Think of placing your elbows to either side of your plate and shoving meat into your mouth while looking furtively around the table.
> Later examples of this behavior is said to have come from sailors who would use their elbows to stabilize their plates in rough seas, but typically anyone who felt the need to guard their food while eating (i.e., poor or lower-class folk while not at home, people who lived on the street, or who spent time with violent/aggressive people such as prisoners) would similarly use their arms to guard their food while they ate. In fact, my friend's brother went to prison and when he came out, it took him a long time to stop sitting like that. So, because of the association with fear/aggression/the lower-class, this behavior became considered rude at a polite dining table. In general, for a polite dining experience, we want to try to shed any of our behaviors that relate to being guarded and instead emphasize behavior that gives the appearance of comfort, relaxation, and openness.
> Victorian teachings also noted that this behavior fell into other similarly aggressive behaviors such as dangling an arm over your neighbors chair or leaning too far to one side or the other while sitting: these all sharing in common the idea that you are taking up too much of other people's space (by leaning, dangling, or setting your elbows up like you're about to go MMA on your dining companions).


So I feel just fine putting my elbows on the table gently but if my wife reaches for my steak, they are ready to fend her off!


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## KenOC (Mar 7, 2011)

My dinners are, as Thomas Hobbes said, nasty, brutish, and short. And that's the way I like 'em, mate!


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## Art Rock (Nov 28, 2009)

In Holland, it is often seen as a compliment to finish the food that's put on the table. In China it's an insult to the hosts.


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## Jos (Oct 14, 2013)

TwoFlutesOneTrumpet said:


> No sex while eating, is the rule in our house.


Hahaha !! I feel a Seinfeld quote coming up (ooh uhr)


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## TwoFlutesOneTrumpet (Aug 31, 2011)

KenOC said:


> My dinners are, as Thomas Hobbes said, nasty, brutish, and short. And that's the way I like 'em, mate!


Hobbes was referring to Medieval peasant life but I guess you could apply it to your food too


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## TwoFlutesOneTrumpet (Aug 31, 2011)

Art Rock said:


> In Holland, it is often seen as a compliment to finish the food that's put on the table. In China it's an insult to the hosts.


That's because it means you likely ate their cat.


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## pcnog11 (Nov 14, 2016)

TwoFlutesOneTrumpet said:


> No sex while eating, is the rule in our house.


Vice versa????????


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## Vaneyes (May 11, 2010)

None.


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## Huilunsoittaja (Apr 6, 2010)

My usual dinner at home (maybe 3-4 nights a week)

1. Cook half my food in microwave
2. Eat the other half (something fresh like vegetables) in the kitchen while I watch the food finish cooking
3. Eat the cooked stuff in 5 minutes at my table (as long as it's not too hot, or otherwise I let it cool down) with my filtered water bottle as my drink
4. Put dishes (if any, might just be a fork) in the sink, and throw all the other trash away
5. End. 

Yo ho, yo ho, the hermit's life for me!


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