# Piano trio composition (need feedback)



## lachlan1415 (Jul 30, 2018)

Hello, I'm 15 years and I compose as a hobby. This is the composition I made for my IGCSE music coursework. It's just over 7 minutes long and I completed it today. (well not fully complete as this is the first draft) Since this is the first draft, there are still some harmonic inaccuracies and also a few awkward passages. There may also be some passages that don't sound so good but I will fix all of that up when I come back to edit.. (which I will change). This piece took me around 2-3 months to compose. This is in the style of a late classical and early romantic piece. I normally compose for 1 hour every other day and have been composing for just over a yea I actually completed a big chunk of it over the last weekend since I had nothing to do because of Christmas break. I plan to compose 2 more movements. One slow and another finale. If you could give some feedback that would be great.

link:


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## pkoi (Jun 10, 2017)

Good job!

Here are my comments for the exposition: since your work is written in the classical style, I would suggest to leave the last modulation to G-major away or write it out more clearly as a coda. Ending the exposition of a major mode piece that's in sonata form to something else than VAC is uncommon and eats credibility from your piece. The textures from measure 53 onward are very nice, just build the cadence in the end in D-major. 

mm. 8 - 13, write the cello line also to piano's left hand, no reason to leave it out

You could also consider building more cadences to the piece. Before secondary theme zone, you have only one, I:HC (half-cadence) that you build up very long, more or less from measure 14 to measure 26. While this is certainly not uncommon, first level-default in 18th century sonata is to build all the exposition's parts into their own small forms or periods as 18th century theorists would say. Usually it goes as follows: the slow introduction (if there's one) ends in I:HC; The primary theme zone (P) usually in to IAC (perfect authentic cadence); the transition most commonly ends in V:HC, but ending it in I:HC is okay too. Secondary theme zone (S) most commonly is all the time in the key of V and often after the first sufficient VAC the music moves on to brilliant ending figure, which you do also but then modulate further. 

Naturally you can also choose not to follow the 18th century conventions and write in your own style.


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## Phil loves classical (Feb 8, 2017)

Sounds quite good. My comments are only on the phrasing. The 2nd theme does have some accompaniment that sounds a bit off. The main criticism I think is the rhythm of the chords in bar 41 and later in 56, 57 sounds off. Also the music seems to stop in bar 60. In bars 100 to 104, rather than a sustained notes in the bass, maybe a pulsating rhythm. For bars 171-173 I would like to hear altered chord accompaniment rather than 3 of the same in the triplets.


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## EdwardBast (Nov 25, 2013)

Excellent work Lox! I agree with pkoi that the end of the exposition should not be in the tonic, major or minor. It makes the return sound weak.

Also, I think it would be more interesting to have the immediate answer of the opening chords in the strings, at least when the theme is recapitulated, rather than in the piano (although without filling in the harmony with double stops). The contrast of texture would be nice.


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## lachlan1415 (Jul 30, 2018)

pkoi said:


> Good job!
> 
> Here are my comments for the exposition: since your work is written in the classical style, I would suggest to leave the last modulation to G-major away or write it out more clearly as a coda. Ending the exposition of a major mode piece that's in sonata form to something else than VAC is uncommon and eats credibility from your piece. The textures from measure 53 onward are very nice, just build the cadence in the end in D-major.
> 
> ...


Thank you pkoi for writing out such a detailed response.

In the recapitulation, you said that I shouldn't modulate to G major. However, My second theme is in major and in recapitulations in classical music, don't you have to state that theme again but in the tonic key? Perhaps I should change my second theme in the recapitulation (bars 154) to play it in G minor instead?

Regarding cadences, I don't have too many of them since my goal of the composition is to build tension and then release it in the highest and most powerful way to create a sense of satisfaction. Including too many cadences may diminish the effect of building tension.

Thanks a lot


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## lachlan1415 (Jul 30, 2018)

EdwardBast said:


> Excellent work Lox! I agree with pkoi that the end of the exposition should not be in the tonic, major or minor. It makes the return sound weak.
> 
> Also, I think it would be more interesting to have the immediate answer of the opening chords in the strings, at least when the theme is recapitulated, rather than in the piano (although without filling in the harmony with double stops). The contrast of texture would be nice.


Thanks for the response.

I will try to change it so it's not in the tonic.

I will also experiment with filling in the answer with strings because I think that would sound good.


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## lachlan1415 (Jul 30, 2018)

Phil loves classical said:


> Sounds quite good. My comments are only on the phrasing. The 2nd theme does have some accompaniment that sounds a bit off. The main criticism I think is the rhythm of the chords in bar 41 and later in 56, 57 sounds off. Also the music seems to stop in bar 60. In bars 100 to 104, rather than a sustained notes in the bass, maybe a pulsating rhythm. For bars 171-173 I would like to hear altered chord accompaniment rather than 3 of the same in the triplets.


thanks for the response.

Yeah the second theme sound a bit off. (particularly with the violin playing the fast scales)

For your criticism for the sustained notes in the bass, I will make sure I change it so there's variety.


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