# What are your goals?



## brotagonist (Jul 11, 2013)

Some of us are focussed on our careers, others forfeit the career for family, etc. Which drives you? Which is the one you re pursuing?


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## SiegendesLicht (Mar 4, 2012)

Love, family, happiness, even if I know there cannot be 100% happiness. Career and money-earning is only a means to support other goals. Unlike most Americans, I do not allow myself to be defined by my profession or by the amount of money I earn.


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## brotagonist (Jul 11, 2013)

Career and self-actualization are what drive me.

Hitching posts are for horses  I could be like Hugh Heffner and get myself a 20 year-old buxom blonde when I'm old and rich :lol: (or just rent the video :devil.


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## Ilarion (May 22, 2015)

My goal is simple: To always develop my art and craft as a vocalist - And my family is never missing me at the dinner table, home or elsewhere.


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## SiegendesLicht (Mar 4, 2012)

brotagonist said:


> Career and self-actualization are what drive me.
> 
> Hitching posts are for horses  I could be like Hugh Heffner and get myself a 20 year-old buxom blonde when I'm old and rich :lol: (or just rent the video :devil.


Well that is why you emigrated to America. You see, I believe your type of people, the career-driven, would feel better in the USA. My type of people would feel better in Europe, including Germany. To each his own


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## Guest (Jun 21, 2015)

xxxx, I'm goalless!!!


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## ptr (Jan 22, 2013)

..I'm done with either, so like in the song; girls like me just wanna have some fun!

/ptr


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## isorhythm (Jan 2, 2015)

Family, understood broadly to include friends as well. No question. Work is only a means for me.


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## clara s (Jan 6, 2014)

juggle both...

I liked this


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## senza sordino (Oct 20, 2013)

I juggle both career and family / friends. But I'm also trying to squeeze in my own violin development and playing. I am currently taking violin lessons, and learning grade 8 through 10 repertoire takes time and energy. While there is currently a summer hiatus, I also have orchestra rehearsals each week, autumn though to the spring. 

So actually I'm juggling three things.


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## Albert7 (Nov 16, 2014)

My career doesn't mean anything when I am six feet under and family lasts forever.


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## Ingélou (Feb 10, 2013)

I have no children (sadly) but I have always put my husband above my career, although I've managed to have a number of interesting jobs. So in that sense, family comes first. 
But let me explain: I see life as a learning experience, trying to do good, or achieve something in a creative way, or have a good influence on others. The meaning of life (for me) is love & knowledge, and I don't think those stand in opposition to the family.
So I voted 'other'.


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## SarahNorthman (Nov 19, 2014)

I would love a family someday, but only after I have established some form of career. I know it doesn't always work out that way, but one day I would love both.


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## Levanda (Feb 3, 2014)

Sadly I have no goals, make my life easier to live. Majority wish to see family more than ever, I am very honest with that, I don't bother with family. I want to be only with my husband. Ah their only coming for food eat and go and when sitting on the table their all with mobile phones, sick of them. I do love my grand daughter but she is naughty as well she ripped my wall paper. So no goals for me just living simple life, working and I am ok.


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## Albert7 (Nov 16, 2014)

Ingélou said:


> I have no children (sadly) but I have always put my husband above my career, although I've managed to have a number of interesting jobs. So in that sense, family comes first.
> But let me explain: I see life as a learning experience, trying to do good, or achieve something in a creative way, or have a good influence on others. The meaning of life (for me) is love & knowledge, and I don't think those stand in opposition to the family.
> So I voted 'other'.


As a Buddhist I don't have any formalized goals. I have learned to avoid all forms of planning because that has led to tragedy within my life. I have learned the hard way that I appreciate life better when I avoid any Franklin-Covey planner and just relax with music and learn to value those who are close to me with love and affection and deep sense of sacrifice and moral indebtedness.

For example, a few weeks ago, there was a gang related shooting on the 35 MAX bus here on UTA system out in West Valley. Sadly enough, the dead man didn't plan on his death.










http://fox13now.com/2015/06/10/one-in-critical-condition-suspect-in-custody-after-shooting-in-west-valley-city/

So basically I keep to simple goals now. Just survive. Don't get shot. And love my daughter and later on in life, my future princess. Nothing else really matters in the end.


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## Gaspard de la Nuit (Oct 20, 2014)

I have a set of goals, they probably don't fit the usual idea of what a lifetime goal is and to be honest some of them feel rather vague at the moment. But I prefer to think I have some kind of idea of what specific things I should be putting effort into, generally.

The thing that I really struggle with ultimately boils down to believing that I can get nearer to them, and I've come to realize that belief can make a lot of difference.

If I had to give a more definitive answer, I would say my goal is connection...to feel connected to others and feel like I am participating in something great.


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## ArtMusic (Jan 5, 2013)

My parents always juggle both: put food on the table, a roof over our heads, education and things that normal families do. They work hard to deliver all that.


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## Weston (Jul 11, 2008)

I just want to feel I am being creative again. I want to have the energy to create - something. Anything. My "career" has severely impacted that. I used to have a creative profession and I miss it horribly, but the world has moved on since then.

I also want to love my friends and family -- something else the corporate world is trying to destroy.


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## GhenghisKhan (Dec 25, 2014)

The greatest joy for a man is to defeat his enemies, to drive them before him, to take from them all they possess, to see those they love in tears, to ride their horses, and to hold their wives and daughters in his arms.


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## Xaltotun (Sep 3, 2010)

Family comes first (friends NOT included). My second priority is culture: to get as absorbed with European culture and thinking as possible, and pass it on to the next generation, both inside and outside family.


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## SiegendesLicht (Mar 4, 2012)

Xaltotun said:


> Family comes first (friends NOT included). My second priority is culture: to get as absorbed with European culture and thinking as possible, *and pass it on to the next generation*, both inside and outside family.


I am with you there, you ancient sorcerer


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## Guest (Jul 4, 2015)

GhenghisKhan said:


> The greatest joy for a man is to defeat his enemies, to drive them before him, to take from them all they possess, to see those they love in tears, to ride their horses, and to hold their wives and daughters in his arms.


I just like a good beer.


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## SeptimalTritone (Jul 7, 2014)

Personal sanity and stability comes first, especially since over the past three years I've had periods where I've felt very suicidal.

I think that excelling in work (beginning grad school myself) and regularly keeping in touch with family over the phone are integral in keeping me sane and stable. So for me, both.


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## cwarchc (Apr 28, 2012)

Happiness is not a goal…it’s a by-product of a life well lived

Don’t let today’s disappointments cast a shadow on tomorrow’s dreams


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## Vaneyes (May 11, 2010)

To make new friends and maybe golf buddies. And, as always, to promote CM.


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## starthrower (Dec 11, 2010)

To lose 20 lbs, and get laid pretty soon.


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## xample (Mar 8, 2015)

My goals are quite simple really, I just want to live a happy life with my friends and family. I don't need a big job, just something that can provide for them in the long run. Oh, I'd love to be part of a theatre act too someday.


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## breakup (Jul 8, 2015)

A few years ago I was changing my granddaughters diaper (she is now 5 1/2) and I promised myself that I was going to be around to change or at least help to change her child's diaper. At 16 or 17 more years, I'll be around 84 when that happens. I'd better behave myself.


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## Dr Johnson (Jun 26, 2015)

My goals vary.

Sometimes I think of finding a _very_ rich widow in her 90s with a weak heart who wants a (slightly) younger husband.

On other occasions I think of moving to the USA and becoming a bounty hunter.

Then sometimes I dream of writing a bestseller and buying my own island with the proceeds. Or writing a _success d'estime_ that is recognised 20 years after my death.

Then I lie back on the sofa and wait for one of the servants to bring me some champagne.

Or not, as the case may be....


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## Krummhorn (Feb 18, 2007)

I've met all my goals, except for becoming an expert musician. I can never achieve that goal as there is always so much more to learn, and I see my music career as a constant work in progress, even after 54 years as a professional musician. 

Family is first in my life - my wife, our home, our three sons, our two cats, etc. I retired early (at age 58) from the 40 work week grind in 2006 and now live on a government pension as well as my church salary. We are able to live at a very comfortable level. We bought a larger home 4 years ago and it will be paid off in 7 years. That is the only debt we have. 

Now then, did I meet all my goals I set for myself as a young person? No, not at all. Life changes over the years ... we have to go different routes sometimes, change occupations, learn new skills ... but all said and done, I have no regrets and I am very very happy with the final outcome as we face those golden years. 

Kh


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## Clara (Jul 24, 2015)

My career cast a constant shadow over my mind although I am still young it is always there lurking in the background. 

I started school at 4 but I had already begun learning at basic English, maths and German at home. I was admitted into a good school and within a short space of time and some discussion with my parents I was transferred into the year group above me. This happened again when I started High School. 

I am not boasting I know this has noting to do with how cleaver I am. All this means is that I am capable or working at a higher level than what most people my age would be comfortable with. 

I had the option of applying for University this year but but my Mother and I felt I was too young; I am only 15 and I have decided to wait until next year. It will also allow me to hopefully pick up my missing science calcification (biology) as the way my school's time table worked out I could only complete two sciences.

My parents and I have spent a lot of my life preparing me for university and inevitably the career that follows what. Although I do not think my parents goal was in anyway financial I think they merely wanted me to have the options open to me. 

Hopefully by next year I will have decided what I want to study at university. I am drawn to maths and art. An architect maybe? Alas I fear this may be a bit too flamboyant for my Father's approval.


I'd appreciate your thoughts on the matter of what I should study at Uni. I know you do not know me but I have few friends I can turn to and the careers officer told me I was "Above her paid grade..." what a wasted journey that was.


Clara


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## Clara (Jul 24, 2015)

I apologize for the grammar and spelling anomalies in the above post. I am working a piece cross platform dictation software and it's still very much in Alpha and it doesn't like my accent. 

Clara


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## cwarchc (Apr 28, 2012)

It's very difficult for a stranger to comment on this.
I can only relate to the experience with my own children (23 and 26 years old)
I never pushed them into something I wanted to do. (its easy to project yourself onto your children, along with your own hopes & wishes)
However, I always, encouraged them to do what they wanted to do.
My eldest became a chef, but packed his job in sold all his possessions and is now travelling around Australia (loving every minute)
My youngest, loved school, got his degree and is now studying for his phd. and loving it just as much. He's going to Harvard in Sept.
You have to do what YOU want to do
You are, very, young to have this decision to try and make.
Listen to your family, parents, teachers they have your best interests at heart. BUT. You have to make the call
It is YOUR life
I hope you make the best decisions and have a great life
Take my best wishes with you


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## breakup (Jul 8, 2015)

cwarchc said:


> I never pushed them into something I wanted to do. (its easy to project yourself onto your children, along with your own hopes & wishes)
> However, *I always, encouraged them to do what they wanted to do.*


I have made a serious effort to support my own children in their chosen course in life.

When I was growing up there was a man attending our church who would get very intense when he started teaching a class or talking about his faith. Once when his son was growing up and ready to choose a field of study, he asked the pastor to talk to his son, expecting that the pastor would talk him into the ministry. When the pastor told the son to make his own choice, according to what he wanted to do, (not the ministry), the father was furious that the pastor hadn't "talked the son into attending Seminary". Obviously the father was a frustrated pastor and wanted to vicariously live out his dream through his son. I took that story to heart with my own children, and suppressed my own failed ambitions, and encouraged my children to go their own way.


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## breakup (Jul 8, 2015)

Clara said:


> My career cast a constant shadow over my mind although I am still young it is always there lurking in the background.
> 
> I started school at 4 but I had already begun learning at basic English, maths and German at home. I was admitted into a good school and within a short space of time and some discussion with my parents I was transferred into the year group above me. This happened again when I started High School.
> 
> ...


Well, I had the opposite problem, I was started too young and needed to be held back a year to get into my comfort zone, but even then the bad experience in the first 4 grades made achieving difficult for me. 15 is a bit young to be making life career decisions, but whatever you choose now, understand that after being in it awhile, if you decide you made the wrong choice, change and go in another direction. You are never stuck in one direction, if you see that it was wrong for you.


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## Oebis (Nov 23, 2014)

Personal fulfillment in whatever form it may take is the only goal of a human life. If someone is lazy then they ought to embrace that aspect of who they are, and simply not work. As for their "obligations" to society, they are utterly chimerical.


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## Dr Johnson (Jun 26, 2015)

Oebis said:


> Personal fulfillment in whatever form it may take is the only goal of a human life. *If someone is lazy then they ought to embrace that aspect of who they are, and simply not work.* As for their "obligations" to society, they are utterly chimerical.


Thank you. I am _deeply_ lazy.


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## Harmonie (Mar 24, 2007)

I had a wake-up call several years ago. I don't know if you can really call it that, because all it really did was take my mind away from what everyone likes to call "the real world". I learned that a tomorrow is not guaranteed. A tomorrow where we are abled and can do everything is most certainly not guaranteed either.

From there, I changed from a career-motivated living, to a knowledge/learning-motivated (and skill in music/instruments [mainly bassoon], too)... You can say I let my life crash and burn. Things did not play out like I had imagined them to.

But regardless... What I want from life is what I mentioned above, and a loving partner to love and be with through all of the hard times that are to come in my life.


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