# Favorite music when you're feeling really lonely



## lupinix (Jan 9, 2014)

Mostly when I feel lonely I listen to composers like Chopin (sonata 2, his preludes 4, 6, 15 and 20, fantasy, nocturne 20,...) and Rachmaninov (suite for two pianos 1, piano concerto 2&3, prelude op 32 no 10, vocalise, morceaux de fantasie, isle of the death, symphony), or Erik Saties Gnossiennes and Gymnopedies
also I can always find myself in many parts of prokofievs 3rd symphony and first string quartet, the middle movement of ravels piano concerto for two hands, the adagio for strings by barber, Shostakovich prelude and fugue no 4, the Chaccone for solo violin by bach and also much light music and soundtrack music (for instance goodbye lenin by yann tiersen).

At other times though I rather distract myself from my loneliness by warm or convivial or fantastic music like renaissance music or milhauds creation du monde or rimsky korsakovs scheherezade or sibelius fifth symphony

What is your favorite music when you're feeling lonely?


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## stevederekson (Jan 5, 2014)

Lohengrin's first act prelude.

But, I can identify with Rach's vocalise, particularly the piano transcription. I remember listening to it myself when in a similar state.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

"Hard Day's Night" by the Beatles.


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## lupinix (Jan 9, 2014)

stevederekson said:


> Lohengrin's first act prelude.
> 
> But, I can identify with Rach's vocalise, particularly the piano transcription. I remember listening to it myself when in a similar state.


I also listen much to the piano transcription, and to the violin&piano transcribtion. I also love the orchestrated version that is conducted by rachmaninov himself. I also really love the lohengrin first act prelude even though im not a particular fan of wagner in general.



hpowders said:


> "Hard Day's Night" by the Beatles.


haha good one! was my favorite song a few years ago when I was about 15


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## OboeKnight (Jan 25, 2013)

Chopin is always good lonely music...helps you feel sorry for yourself haha. I also enjoy cello music when I'm lonely...but I enjoy cello music all the time anyway...well, perhaps I'm always lonely? oh well. Playing On My Own from Les Miserables on repeat is also a good thing to do when you're lonely


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## science (Oct 14, 2010)

The key isn't what I listen to, but what I drink: hot, strong, black coffee. 

For lonely music, I guess I would go with old country, especially Hank Williams and Johnny Cash. I don't know about Hank, but I would give an arm to have had a few drinks with J. R. Cash.


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## ComposerOfAvantGarde (Dec 2, 2011)

Probably Malambo by Ginastera, from Estancia.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

lupinix said:


> I also listen much to the piano transcription, and to the violin&piano transcribtion. I also love the orchestrated version that is conducted by rachmaninov himself. I also really love the lohengrin first act prelude even though im not a particular fan of wagner in general.
> 
> haha good one! was my favorite song a few years ago when I was about 15


Snaps me out it, whatever "it" happens to be.


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## brianvds (May 1, 2013)

The only times when I am ever lonely is when I am in company, and then I can't even put on any music, dammit.


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## PetrB (Feb 28, 2012)

What the?

Music _is_ company, period.


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## lupinix (Jan 9, 2014)

brianvds said:


> The only times when I am ever lonely is when I am in company, and then I can't even put on any music, dammit.


I too am familiar with that problem


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## Weston (Jul 11, 2008)

I rarely feel lonely but if I need to wallow in it there is the Adagio form the Gayane Ballet Suite or the more common Vaughan-Williams' Tallis Fantasia.


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## neoshredder (Nov 7, 2011)

I cheer myself up with some Mozart Symphonies. Preferably his first 13. They lift my spirits. Who cares if they aren't masterpieces like his later ones? They get the job done for me.


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## clavichorder (May 2, 2011)

Renaissance music, particularly for viol consort or virginal/harpsichord. Also, Handel is pretty comforting to me right now.


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## neoshredder (Nov 7, 2011)

clavichorder said:


> Renaissance music, particularly for viol consort or virginal/harpsichord. Also, Handel is pretty comforting to me right now.


Yeah Handel's got some great stuff to cheer you up. Listening to him right now actually.  Concerti Grossi Op. 6


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## lupinix (Jan 9, 2014)

neoshredder said:


> Yeah Handel's got some great stuff to cheer you up. Listening to him right now actually.  Concerti Grossi Op. 6


gonna listen to that as well, because I dont know handel well=o


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## Ukko (Jun 4, 2010)

I don't recall ever feeling 'really' lonely. When I'm by myself there is at least one other guy to chat with.


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## lupinix (Jan 9, 2014)

Ukko said:


> I don't recall ever feeling 'really' lonely. When I'm by myself there is at least one other guy to chat with.


I mean feeling lonely rather than being alone. You can be all alone and be just fine on yourself or you can be at a great party with many people and yet feel lonely.


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## brotagonist (Jul 11, 2013)

If I were feeling lonely, I wouldn't listen to music: I would go out


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

lupinix said:


> I mean feeling lonely rather than being alone. You can be all alone and be just fine on yourself or you can be at a great party with many people and yet feel lonely.


You can be married and feel very lonely.


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## stevederekson (Jan 5, 2014)

hpowders said:


> You can be married and feel very lonely.


I have a feeling your comment will be heavily liked.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

stevederekson said:


> I have a feeling your comment will be heavily liked.


I think I rang a bell with that one.
Dedicated to all those folks who married a spouse who can't stand classical music.


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## SiegendesLicht (Mar 4, 2012)

hpowders said:


> You can be married and feel very lonely.


Why would you marry someone who cannot provide company and intellectual stimulation for you?

As to the question - it is Schubert (the lieder and the piano sonatas) when I want to play a 19th century Romantic hero and bask in that melancholic feeling for a while, and Wagner (especially Die Meistersinger) or Beethoven to get me out of it.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

SiegendesLicht said:


> Why would you marry someone who cannot provide company and intellectual stimulation for you?
> 
> As to the question - it is Schubert (the lieder and the piano sonatas) when I want to play a 19th century Romantic hero and bask in that melancholic feeling for a while, and Wagner (especially Die Meistersinger) or Beethoven to get me out of it.


I don't know! Why don't you ask one who did?


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## SiegendesLicht (Mar 4, 2012)

hpowders said:


> I think I rang a bell with that one.
> Dedicated to all those folks who married a spouse who can't stand classical music.


Personally I would at least try to learn to appreciate something my spouse is passionate about, if only for the sheer reason that the person I love is passionate about it. I know my man would do the same.


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## Blake (Nov 6, 2013)

Music is much greater company than most people, I've found.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

SiegendesLicht said:


> Personally I would at least try to learn to appreciate something my spouse is passionate about, if only for the sheer reason that the person I love is passionate about it. I know my man would do the same.


Of course! One shouldn't be expected to marry someone who is a carbon copy of oneself. The more interests a spouse brings to the table, the better!


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## stevederekson (Jan 5, 2014)

> Personally I would at least try to learn to appreciate something my spouse is passionate about, if only for the sheer reason that the person I love is passionate about it. I know my man would do the same.


Idealism is for women and the young.


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## Winterreisender (Jul 13, 2013)

Sometimes when I'm feeling lonely, I want to put on something really miserable so I can sit in my house with the lights off, wallowing in self-pity. In these cases, Tchaikovsky's 6th usually works fine, or perhaps select songs from Schubert.

On other occasions when I'm feeling lonely, I want something that will cheer me up and remind me of all the joys in the word, in which case I go for Mahler's 2nd, select songs from Schubert again (Schubert has all emotions covered!), or simply a Mozart marathon.


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## Headphone Hermit (Jan 8, 2014)

SiegendesLicht said:


> Why would you marry someone who cannot provide company and intellectual stimulation for you?
> 
> Because you love them deeply <3 . Mine is watching 'The Voice' whilst I'm hidden in my headphones listening to Haydn - she dislikes almost everything I listen to, doesn't like birdwatching, is apathetic to football (and is hostile to cricket), refuses to read classic literature and likes cute kittens and 'You've been framed' ..... but I'd much rather be with her than any of you (as far as I know)!
> 
> Getting back to the topic ..... for lonely times, I ask Bach to join me (via Milstein or Grumiaux) with the solo violin partitas .... or get Maria to sing Bellini for me .... or eavesdrop in on Dido and Aeneas in 'Nuit d'Ivresse' from _les Troyens_ by Berlioz. Schuberts solo piano works too.


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## KRoad (Jun 1, 2012)

Actually, when I'm feeling lonely, I usually work on my own compositions, for me good tunage = good therapy. (I'd put a Spotify link in here to a few of those tunes - but we all know that sort of thang just ain't kosher here at TC). 

If I lack a sense of community and connection to my fellow man (or woman), then to counter the spiritual/social isolation I'll reach for something like Coplands "cowboy" ballets. For introspective contemplation I'll resort to the impressionists Debussy, Satie et al, then if all else fails - I'll hit the bottle.

Okay, well sometimes I reach for the bottle first...


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## neoshredder (Nov 7, 2011)

Pass my time with strangers. But this bottle is my only friend. So yeah I reach for the bottle when lonely and too much time on my hands. Then I listen to 80's Metal to pretend my life is worth living and having fun. Thank goodness I'm getting these likes on TC. Alright the last 2 sentences are just me being dramatic. I'm not that sad. lol


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## Ukko (Jun 4, 2010)

lupinix said:


> I mean feeling lonely rather than being alone. You can be all alone and be just fine on yourself or you can be at a great party with many people and yet feel lonely.


OK. But except for bluegrass gatherings there is no music I like at parties - and I don't recall ever feeling lonely at a bluegrass party. I usually had a beer in hand, singing along in what passes for the tenor part (a third above the melody) and getting looks of mild dismay from people nearby.

 Ah, those were good times.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

neoshredder said:


> Pass my time with strangers. But this bottle is my only friend. So yeah I reach for the bottle when lonely and too much time on my hands. Then I listen to 80's Metal to pretend my life is worth living and having fun. Thank goodness I'm getting these likes on TC. Alright the last 2 sentences are just me being dramatic. I'm not that sad. lol


I just gave you a "charity like". I'm doing my part.


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## Mahlerian (Nov 27, 2012)

neoshredder said:


> Pass my time with strangers. But this bottle is my only friend. So yeah I reach for the bottle when lonely and too much time on my hands. Then I listen to 80's Metal to pretend my life is worth living and having fun. Thank goodness I'm getting these likes on TC. Alright the last 2 sentences are just me being dramatic. I'm not that sad. lol


Post Bach or Sibelius on the Now Listening thread, and you'll be sure to get a like from me! Guaranteed!


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## Blake (Nov 6, 2013)

neoshredder said:


> Pass my time with strangers. But this bottle is my only friend. So yeah I reach for the bottle when lonely and too much time on my hands. Then I listen to 80's Metal to pretend my life is worth living and having fun. Thank goodness I'm getting these likes on TC. *Alright the last 2 sentences are just me being dramatic. I'm not that sad. lol*


Whew, thank goodness. I almost started to have a bit of sympathy for you.


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## Braves (Apr 25, 2013)

Beethoven's late sonatas and late string quartets


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## Ingélou (Feb 10, 2013)

Almost any music will help when I'm feeling lonely. But I have a reason to feel pretty stressed at present & this morning I thought I'd listen to a Carolan cd played by the harpist Derek Bell that I'd found on YouTube. In no time at all the gentle soothing harp melodies had made me feel serene & able to cope. Maybe because it's a foretaste of :angel::angel::angel:?

Here it is, in case you'd like a dollop of tranquillity -


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## lupinix (Jan 9, 2014)

KRoad said:


> Actually, when I'm feeling lonely, I usually work on my own compositions, for me good tunage = good therapy. (I'd put a Spotify link in here to a few of those tunes - but we all know that sort of thang just ain't kosher here at TC).
> 
> If I lack a sense of community and connection to my fellow man (or woman), then to counter the spiritual/social isolation I'll reach for something like Coplands "cowboy" ballets. For introspective contemplation I'll resort to the impressionists Debussy, Satie et al, then if all else fails - I'll hit the bottle.
> 
> Okay, well sometimes I reach for the bottle first...


composing is therapy for me too


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## Cheyenne (Aug 6, 2012)

Ingélou said:


> Here it is, in case you'd like a dollop of tranquillity -


Very nice indeed. The harp is a nice instrument. Dittersdorf's harp concerto could perhaps also cure a gloomy mood.

Generally the 'atmosphere' of the music doesn't transfer to me though; music's no drug. If the music is great, it will captivate and absorb me - keep me enchanted, spell-bound - and thus, I suppose, distract me; but Shostakovich does not spontaneously make me gloomy and Mozart does not spontaneously make me happy. My choices for an eloquent lament and a celebration of humanity's virtues would likely be Shostakovich's 14th and Mahler's 8th symphonies, respectively. Both celebrations of life - but in drastically different ways.


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## Cosmos (Jun 28, 2013)

Busoni - Fantasia nach Bach
Rachmaninov - Vespers
Barber - Adagio for Strings (it obvious)
Scriabin - Sonatas 3, 5, and 8
Kosenko - Passacaglia from Etudes in the style of old dances
Liszt - Hungarian Rhapsody 5
Schubert - Winterreisse
R. Strauss - Metamorphosen


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

Winterreisse would make me more lonely and down, but that's just me.


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## Ebab (Mar 9, 2013)

hpowders said:


> Winterreisse [sic] would make me more lonely and down, but that's just me.


Thankfully I haven't been lonely for quite a while, but I do think I remember. You know, when you have wicked tooth ache or the like, you sometimes want to press real hard, and it hurts _like crazy_. And it still feels better because you think you can at least _control_ the pain. That's what the Winterreise is like when you're lonely. And at the least, it's beautiful. Beautiful _does_ help.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

Me neither, but if I would be feeling lonely, I would want something upbeat-Mozart major key piano concertos, Stravinsky's Pulcinella, Bach's third orchestral suite, Wiliam Schuman's 10th symphony, Prokofiev's third piano concerto.
I'd want to feel better, not to commit suicide.You can keep your Winterreise. It would just make me [sic]!!!

Thanks for the [sic] setup by the way!!!! LMAO


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## Dustin (Mar 30, 2012)

hpowders said:


> Me neither, but if I would be feeling lonely, I would want something upbeat-Mozart major key piano concertos, Stravinsky's Pulcinella, Bach's third orchestral suite, Wiliam Schuman's 10th symphony, Prokofiev's third piano concerto.
> I'd want to feel better, not to commit suicide.You can keep your Winterreise. It would just make me [sic]!!!
> 
> Thanks for the [sic] setup by the way!!!! LMAO


At least for me, both uplifting music AND depressing music can help lift you out of a funk. Sometimes, it helps to really feel the pain/loneliness by hammering the point home with some really sad music. Feeling a negative feeling as intensely as you can seems to help get it out of your system. And then at the right time, the uplifting music can get you back on your feet when your ready.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

Dustin said:


> At least for me, both uplifting music AND depressing music can help lift you out of a funk. Sometimes, it helps to really feel the pain/loneliness by hammering the point home with some really sad music. Feeling a negative feeling as intensely as you can seems to help get it out of your system. And then at the right time, the uplifting music can get you back on your feet when your ready.


I can see your point, but for me, I'm reaching for the aforementioned classical pieces or the Beatles, Beach Boys or Miles Davis.


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## Itullian (Aug 27, 2011)

Jethro Tull of course.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

If I was down, and I've yet to experience this emotional state, but I've read about it in reference books, I would want to listen to upbeat music. The final movement of Beethoven's 7th symphony or the third movement of his Pastoral, the Beatles, Jethro Tull, hot jazz; uplifting stuff to make me smile.


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## Blake (Nov 6, 2013)

Upbeat music is quite annoying when I've got the blues.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

Okay. I pretended I was down. I listened to some great slow Bach and I could actually agree that for some, it could snap one out of a funk.


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## Llyranor (Dec 20, 2010)

Depends. 

Bach's Chaconne will get me out of any slump.

Shostakovich's Passacaglia movement from his 1st Violin Concerto will bring me further into despair, until I realize it can't get any worse than that - and then I feel better  Sometimes the situation calls for it, hehehe! Strangely cathartic, that one.


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## hreichgott (Dec 31, 2012)

Playing, anything, the composers keep me company.


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## CypressWillow (Apr 2, 2013)

His existential angst makes mine seem insignificant! Always perks me right up. And isn't the music perfect?






This could probably go in the "Guilty Pleasures" thread as well. I don't have to feel lonely to enjoy sweet Henri.


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## Morimur (Jan 23, 2014)

*Anything by Mahler.*


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## Tristan (Jan 5, 2013)

Generally more uplifting/lively music is needed for that--in particular, dances seem to work well


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

That's what I thought too, but others are claiming introspective music can get them out of a funk.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

If you're in a particularly grand funk, feeling down and out, simply forget the music. Have a DVD handy of the Three Stooges with Moe Larry and Shemp. Should have you laughing within the hour.


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## lupinix (Jan 9, 2014)

the problem is that if I'm really very very lonely uplifting music won't be uplifting anymore but only hurt more. Just very happy upbeat things without too much warmth only irritates me, or makes me feel more alone in this world full of happy people :'), cozy or warm tunes gives me a feeling of melancholy, or at least longing for something out of my reach....


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

The best thing if you're down is getting "likes" on TC!


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## Chordalrock (Jan 21, 2014)

The top spot currently would probably go to...


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## Ravndal (Jun 8, 2012)

Bach played by Glenn Gould


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## neoshredder (Nov 7, 2011)

hpowders said:


> The best thing if you're down is getting "likes" on TC!


You know what they say. A like a day drives the demons away.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

And 10 likes a day drives the demons away for at least a week.
Tchaikovsky could have used about 10 good likes a day for a couple of years.


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## mtmailey (Oct 21, 2011)

AS for me any happy music will do it for me.
View attachment 33260


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## Dustin (Mar 30, 2012)

Classical choice: Late Beethoven Quartets, especially No. 15 in A-minor.

Non-classical: Frank Sinatra: Only the Lonely and In the Wee Small Hours


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## moody (Nov 5, 2011)

Ravndal said:


> Bach played by Glenn Gould


That would make me feel worse.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

neoshredder said:


> You know what they say. A like a day drives the demons away.


Could you just visualize Tchaikovsky at his shrink: "I recommend 10 "likes" a day on Talk Classical for 6 months. Come back at that time and we will re-evaluate."


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## lupinix (Jan 9, 2014)

hpowders said:


> Could you just visualize Tchaikovsky at his shrink: "I recommend 10 "likes" a day on Talk Classical for 6 months. Come back at that time and we will re-evaluate."


It really made my day when I found that I had got 13 likes in a few hours some days ago! :')


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## Berlioznestpasmort (Jan 24, 2014)

Might I recommend w/o the charge of sacrilege Petula Clark's _Downtown_? "When you're alone and life is making you lonely..." One of the most therapeutic songs of all time, in my experience. And no less an authority than Glenn Gould was an enthusiastic admirer of it!


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## shangoyal (Sep 22, 2013)

For morbid sadness, there is Chopin.

For commonplace boredom, there is Mozart.

And for existential angst, there is Beethoven.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

lupinix said:


> It really made my day when I found that I had got 13 likes in a few hours some days ago! :')


It's a very nice idea. Sometimes I receive a "like" from a post I made almost 2 months ago. As new folks come on board at TC, they review old threads and here we are again!!!


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

shangoyal said:


> For morbid sadness, there is Chopin.
> 
> For commonplace boredom, there is Mozart.
> 
> And for existential angst, there is Beethoven.


Sorry that none of these hacks can meet your high standards.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

When I'm feeling really down, as when I have to pay my income taxes, I find pop music or jazz usually does the trick:
Pet Sounds by the Beachboys, Revolver by the Beatles, even some Grateful Dead, Miles Davis' Bitches Brew or Sketches of Spain, etc;


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## julianoq (Jan 29, 2013)

A lot of great posts concerning the "likes" here, I laughed on many :lol:

Regarding the music to listen when alone, to me is the String Quartet No.14 Op.131 by Beethoven. This music is so powerful that even if it is the music that marked my traumatic divorce a few months ago, I feel that this composition is above mundane problems and it was not infected by my trauma. It talks straight to my soul.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

Sorry to hear about your divorce, julianoq.


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## julianoq (Jan 29, 2013)

hpowders said:


> Sorry to hear about your divorce, julianoq.


Thanks. No problem, it is in the past already


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

lupinix said:


> It really made my day when I found that I had got 13 likes in a few hours some days ago! :')


Sometimes one wonders if a "like" is genuine or simply a "charity like" because someone feels sorry for the poster. 

To like or not to like, that is the query.


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## presto (Jun 17, 2011)

If I feel lonely, which I don't very often (house full of family) I probably wouldn't play Classical music, it would be lighter less emotional or intellectual stuff.


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## clara s (Jan 6, 2014)

hpowders said:


> When I'm feeling really down, as when I have to pay my income taxes, I find pop music or jazz usually does the trick:
> Pet Sounds by the Beachboys, Revolver by the Beatles, even some Grateful Dead, Miles Davis' Bitches Brew or Sketches of Spain, etc;


when it comes to paying income taxes,

i do not think there is anything to sooth the loneliness hahaha

not even Pettersson


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## clara s (Jan 6, 2014)

I never feel lonely

some times though, I want to be alone

these specific times, I love to listen 

the gadfly of Shostakovich or his suite for two pianos


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

clara s said:


> when it comes to paying income taxes,
> 
> i do not think there is anything to sooth the loneliness hahaha
> 
> not even Pettersson


Yes. You are right. Who was I kidding? 

With all the money I've submitted to the government, I should have a highway named after me!


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## Berlioznestpasmort (Jan 24, 2014)

hpowders said:


> Sometimes one wonders if a "like" is genuine or simply a "charity like" because someone feels sorry for the poster.
> 
> To like or not to like, that is the query.


'Like' is an online phenomenon worthy of discussion - philosophical and psychological. I use it sparingly myself; to me it often means more than merely 'like' as in 'REALLY FUNNY,' 'excellent observation', or 'I also _really_ enjoy that'. I can't recollect using it for sympathy yet - but no reason to see that use as less genuine when employed empathetically. Lupinix is surely expressing something well nigh universal in describing great delight from such public approbation.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

Berlioznestpasmort said:


> 'Like' is an online phenomenon worthy of discussion - philosophical and psychological. I use it sparingly myself; to me it often means more than merely 'like' as in 'REALLY FUNNY,' 'excellent observation', or 'I also _really_ enjoy that'. I can't recollect using it for sympathy yet - but no reason to see that use as less genuine when employed empathetically. Lupinix is surely expressing something well nigh universal in describing his delight from such public approbation.


No question. It's especially nice when an unexpected like comes along that you weren't expecting, such as from a new poster or a regular poster who you haven't yet encountered.
I'm not knocking it. Just wondering, as I'm always wont to do.


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## Berlioznestpasmort (Jan 24, 2014)

hpowders said:


> No question. It's especially nice when an unexpected like comes along that you weren't expecting, such as from a new poster or a regular poster who you haven't yet encountered.
> I'm not knocking it. Just wondering, as I'm always wont to do.


Wondering = Good; Not Liking My Post = Bad.  :lol:


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

Berlioznestpasmort said:


> Wondering = Good; Not Liking My Post = Bad.  :lol:


So reading the TC guidelines, I was shocked to find that "likes" have absolutely no monetary value.
I thought they were similar to frequent flyer miles. My bad!


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## mirepoix (Feb 1, 2014)

Recently a friend went back home after being here a long time. During the first evening after they'd gone the place seemed empty. I settled down in a chair with my headphones and listened to a version of Mood Indigo by Duke Ellington - the fifteen minute studio version from the 1950s - and by the time he and Strayhorn and all those guys were finished I felt just fine. It's an obvious thing to say, but music is very powerful indeed.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

Sometimes it works. Sometimes it doesn't. It depends how deep the funk I guess.
Even music isn't a universal cure.


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## Blancrocher (Jul 6, 2013)

Berlioznestpasmort said:


> I can't recollect using it for sympathy yet - but no reason to see that use as less genuine when employed empathetically.


I'm especially appreciative of the pity-likes people give me when I tell a lousy joke--usually DrKilroy or Ingelou.

In any case, when I'm feeling really lonely I listen to a little Mahler or Beethoven and post about it in "Current Listening," after which I feel like the center of the universe.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

Blancrocher said:


> I'm especially appreciative of the pity-likes people give me when I tell a lousy joke--usually DrKilroy or Ingelou.
> 
> In any case, when I'm feeling really lonely I listen to a little Mahler or Beethoven and post about it in "Current Listening," after which I feel like the center of the universe.


Yes. That's sort of what I meant. If I make a lousy post (like I did once in 1996) is the "like" I get a form of sarcasm or pity?


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## Blancrocher (Jul 6, 2013)

hpowders said:


> Yes. That's sort of what I meant. If I make a lousy post (like I did once in 1996) is the "like" I get a form of sarcasm or pity?


Best not to think about it--but if you do, just assume that the "like" you got was from the one person with real discernment and perception.


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## Berlioznestpasmort (Jan 24, 2014)

hpowders said:


> Sometimes it works. Sometimes it doesn't. It depends how deep the funk I guess.
> Even music isn't a universal cure.


Agree - and like all medicine even music can have its side effects and worsen the original condition!


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## Berlioznestpasmort (Jan 24, 2014)

hpowders said:


> Yes. That's sort of what I meant. If I make a lousy post (like I did once in 1996) is the "like" I get a form of sarcasm or pity?


Precisely! Now _that_ is troubling: what if 'Like' is just a sort of mild disdain - a sort of waving of the Royal Hand to disperse, go away - as opposed to the 'Really Like' or 'Love!' which are not options but only because we suspect we're not worthy of them anyway. Just my Kafka thought for the day.


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## cwarchc (Apr 28, 2012)

Loneliness is a state of mind that we need to look at 
It is only people who isolate themselves and cannot establish a relationship with the outside world who feel lonely. If you keep yourself enclosed, even if you live among thousands of people you will still feel very lonely. However, if you keep yourself open, then even if you are living alone, you will still have a very full life. So, open your mind and treat everyone you meet as your intimate, virtuous friend.


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## Huilunsoittaja (Apr 6, 2010)

I am too introverted to become easily lonely. It's the opposite circumstance, to be over-exposed to people, is what I personally experience more.

For this reason, when I want to be alone, it's not "loneliness" but simply a time for a breather. I like a contrast of introverted and extroverted music, relaxing and high energy. I may go to piano music for my soothing stuff, and orchestral music for my energetic stuff. But if I actually _was _lonely, if I was desiring someone's company, I may listen to something like this:


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

Blancrocher said:


> Best not to think about it--but if you do, just assume that the "like" you got was from the one person with real discernment and perception.
> 
> View attachment 34342


Yes. Probably best just to be delighted some nice person took the time to do it.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

Berlioznestpasmort said:


> Precisely! Now _that_ is troubling: what if 'Like' is just a sort of mild disdain - a sort of waving of the Royal Hand to disperse, go away - as opposed to the 'Really Like' or 'Love!' which are not options but only because we suspect we're not worthy of them anyway. Just my Kafka thought for the day.


Maybe it's best not to analyze it too much, not an easy thing for me.


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## Vaneyes (May 11, 2010)

What else, Berio Sequenzas.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

Vaneyes said:


> What else, Berio Sequenzas.


It works for me.


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## neoshredder (Nov 7, 2011)

Naturally, It Changes from the movie Snoopy Come Home.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

lupinix said:


> It really made my day when I found that I had got 13 likes in a few hours some days ago! :')


That's really nice!

I also think it's great when a new poster first puts a toe in the water and all of a sudden gets some likes after a few posts.

I remember when I first came on board, Samurai helped me out like that, going out of his way to "like" many of my initial posts as support, an act of kindness I will never forget. A truly classy guy!


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## lupinix (Jan 9, 2014)

cwarchc said:


> Loneliness is a state of mind that we need to look at
> It is only people who isolate themselves and cannot establish a relationship with the outside world who feel lonely. If you keep yourself enclosed, even if you live among thousands of people you will still feel very lonely. However, if you keep yourself open, then even if you are living alone, you will still have a very full life. So, open your mind and treat everyone you meet as your intimate, virtuous friend.


Maybe ten years I could and did believe this, my own experience is sadly different. But you seem like a kind and warm person who doesn't judge quickly, so maybe I should try again  and Im sure there are others alike in this world


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## lupinix (Jan 9, 2014)

Huilunsoittaja said:


> I am too introverted to become easily lonely. It's the opposite circumstance, to be over-exposed to people, is what I personally experience more.
> 
> For this reason, when I want to be alone, it's not "loneliness" but simply a time for a breather. I like a contrast of introverted and extroverted music, relaxing and high energy. I may go to piano music for my soothing stuff, and orchestral music for my energetic stuff. But if I actually _was _lonely, if I was desiring someone's company, I may listen to something like this:


Yeah I know this feeling too, and I don't quite mean feeling lonely as in desiring someone elses company, at least I rarely feel this too, unless I really miss someone in particular a lot
I do feel alone in the world a lot, like being unheard, or not understand, or looked down upon, or just in company of people that every one around me is so different even though they don't even know it, but that I feel that when they would find out they really wouldn't want to be with me, or even hate me
maybe a bit extreme, but its more the kind of direction of feeling alone Im aiming at

btw its beautiful the link


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## Huilunsoittaja (Apr 6, 2010)

lupinix said:


> Yeah I know this feeling too, and I don't quite mean feeling lonely as in desiring someone elses company, at least I rarely feel this too, unless I really miss someone in particular a lot
> I do feel alone in the world a lot, like being unheard, or not understand, or looked down upon, or just in company of people that every one around me is so different even though they don't even know it, but that I feel that when they would find out they really wouldn't want to be with me, or even hate me
> maybe a bit extreme, but its more the kind of direction of feeling alone Im aiming at
> 
> btw its beautiful the link


I completely understand this, having gone through it myself. But I reached a resolution about it in the last few years of my life. As a wise person has told me, these are certain steps of life:

1) Discovering who others are for the first time (notably identifying your family vs. friends when you are a child)
2) Discovering who _you _are for the first time (comparing yourself to your family and increased number of friends in childhood/adolescence)
3) Discovering that you are very different and in many ways isolated from others around you (ultimate struggle with peer pressure as teenager/young adult)
_4) Discovering that actually everyone suffers from isolation just like you, that we're all quietly in it together_ (becoming independent as a young adult and beyond, although this order isn't entirely restricted by age. It is simply affected by your experiences in life)


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## lupinix (Jan 9, 2014)

Huilunsoittaja said:


> I completely understand this, having gone through it myself. But I reached a resolution about it in the last few years of my life. As a wise person has told me, these are certain steps of life:
> 
> 1) Discovering who others are for the first time (notably identifying your family vs. friends when you are a child)
> 2) Discovering who _you _are for the first time (comparing yourself to your family and increased number of friends in childhood/adolescence)
> ...


thats a beautiful way of looking at it  thank you


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## Alydon (May 16, 2012)

When I put on the Bartok quartets they actually make me feel lonely and extremely desolate which I mention in a positive way as there seems to be a big cathartic element there. But rather than feeling lonely but a bit down I always turn up the Haydn London Symphonies which always put a good hue on anything.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

Yes. I wouldn't reach for the Bartok quartets either if I was in a funk. His violin concerto #2 is a different matter and I find it uplifting. The Haydn London Symphonies are a fine choice or especially The Creation or any of the late masses should get me out of a funk in a hurry.


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## Marschallin Blair (Jan 23, 2014)

julianoq said:


> A lot of great posts concerning the "likes" here, I laughed on many :lol:
> 
> Regarding the music to listen when alone, to me is the String Quartet No.14 Op.131 by Beethoven. This music is so powerful that even if it is the music that marked my traumatic divorce a few months ago, I feel that this composition is above mundane problems and it was not infected by my trauma. It talks straight to my soul.


---
Sorry about your traumatic divorce; truly. . . I think the Op. 131 String Quartet is just SUBLIME; and just the type of catharsis you need to get into the upswing of things. 
--


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## aleazk (Sep 30, 2011)

Being honest, listening to music (any music) while being in those states only augmented the bad feelings. If you are in a sensible emotional moment, I don't think it's a good idea to submerge in a sea of strong emotional stimulation. And certainly not with this piece, for example!.
Curiously, I actually didn't feel bad while listening to the music; in fact, quite the opposite. But I noticed that relying only in music for having moments of happiness only augmented the feeling of metaphysical detachment with respect to the real world. In fact, that was actually the reason why music made me happy in those moments. It was a way to escape the worldly problems. And that's the problem. If your loneliness problem is not just a passing sensation or something circumstantial (in that case, there's no problem, everyone can feel that from time to time, and in that case, I do recommend music and detachment!), then it's more recommendable to work in the actual causes instead of digging more and more in that emotional hole. I can assure you that the hole has no bottom!.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

Yes. That's why I wrote that music is not a universal panacea. Sometimes it helps. Not always. Deep persistent funks usually require professional help.


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## Guest (Feb 7, 2014)

Yep, I agree with Aleazk and HPowders, though I do understand one can take "pleasure" out of feeling blue.
But I have a solution. When I'm blue, I'll put on either of the slow movements of Beethoven's 'Emperor' or 3rd piano concertos.
They satisfy my melancholy (magnify it, even) but also help me perk up. Try it, Lupinix, and let me know how it goes.


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## lupinix (Jan 9, 2014)

I especially like music like rachmaninovs third piano concerto:
*1st movement* takes you away from the world to a place you can feel more *save*, a kind of *reverie,* 
but then the *second movement* suddenly *confronts* you again with the emotions, while still being in that faraway place where you can take them better and *look deeply in them *and see where the problem really lies, this is in my experience the only way to really* heal *from them without them coming back, mostly 
then the *3rd movement * comes and you suddenly feel *hope *again, you know you can do it again!

to me its a therapeutic piece


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## Autumn Leaves (Jan 3, 2014)

When I'm just plain lonely my favorite rock songs are enough to cheer me up, but when I'm really deeply depressed and disappointed Mozart is the only medicine. Or, to be more precise - Papageno's suicide attempt from _Die Zauberflöte_ and, of course, the following Papageno & Papagena duet. As for now, I never feel lonely after that!

Although, one day I was feeling so dreadful that I didn't even want to listen to the Mozart recordings, and that time it was Glinka's _Ruslan and Lyudmila_ (and my favorite singers performing it) that helped me. The tickets were booked in advance, so I couldn't get away from it. 

Overall, as you can see, the cure for my loneliness is generally made of fairytale operas.

When I'm not exactly depressed but tired and/or bored, I also often listen to _Prinz Eugen, der edle Ritter_, an Austrian military march. And it's quite effective as well!


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## Nagging Grasshopper (Feb 9, 2014)

Handel usually cheers me up!


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

Nagging Grasshopper said:


> Handel usually cheers me up!


I agree with you. Nothing like a stylish performance of Giulio Cesare to cheer one up.
Handel at his absolute best!


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## neoshredder (Nov 7, 2011)

hpowders said:


> I agree with you. Nothing like a stylish performance of Giulio Cesare to cheer one up.
> Handel at his absolute best!


Or Water Music.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

Or the Royal Fireworks Music.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

Or the Hallelujah Chorus from Messiah.


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## techniquest (Aug 3, 2012)

Being as 'lonely' (or at the very least 'alone') is my default condition, I'd say just about the entirety of my music collection


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## alan davis (Oct 16, 2013)

Ross Edwards: Symphony Da Pacem Dominie


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## Guest (Feb 10, 2014)

For *julianoq*:


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## SiegendesLicht (Mar 4, 2012)

There are various kinds of loneliness. One is when you feel that there is not a soul in the whole world that loves and understands you or that even cares about your existence. The other kind is the loneliness of missing someone, that special someone that the powers of fate have for some reason separated you from. For the last several years I have mostly known the second kind only. That is where Wagner helps, for he also knew a great loneliness and a great homesickness, being stranded in the city of Paris, where nobody wanted either him or his music, at an age of a few years older than myself, and that is also where I most feel an inner kinship to the man. And that experience helped him find himself, and he drew courage and direction for his artistic inspiration from it.


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## Morimur (Jan 23, 2014)

Chopin, Beethoven, Atahualpa Yupanqui. There's more, I am sure.


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## neoshredder (Nov 7, 2011)

You are sunlight and I moon. Yeah those lyrics really ring to me when I'm lonely. But I rarely feel lonely.


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## hpowders (Dec 23, 2013)

Renaissance dance music.


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## shangoyal (Sep 22, 2013)

Mozart and Schubert. One is emotional without being sentimental, the other is sentimental but carries it better than almost anybody else. Two composers whose music always guides you in the right direction.


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## fairbanks (Jun 25, 2014)

The Art of Fugue


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