# Heartbreaking Composer quotes



## beetzart (Dec 30, 2009)

I found this one by Schubert, of course I am yet to find the context or even if it was said by him, but all the same, very sad indeed:

"Every night when I go to bed,
I hope that I may never wake again,
and every morning renews my grief."


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## elgar's ghost (Aug 8, 2010)

'There's nothing left but to beg in the streets!'

Allegedly said (or words to that effect) by a delirious Mussorgsky during his final alcohol-fuelled breakdown. A few weeks later he was dead.


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## Jacck (Dec 24, 2017)

“As death, when we come to consider it closely, is the true goal of our existence, I have formed during the last few years such close relationships with this best and truest friend of mankind that death's image is not only no longer terrifying to me, but is indeed very soothing and consoling.” 
WAM

Schubert suffered from tertiary syphilis (neuroinfection), no wonder his life was hell


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## RICK RIEKERT (Oct 9, 2017)

My heart pounds sickeningly and I turn pale... I often feel as if I were dead... I seem to be losing my mind. 
~Robert Schumann


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## Xisten267 (Sep 2, 2018)

"Never in my life having enjoyed the true happiness of love I shall erect a memorial to this loveliest of all dreams in which, from the first to the last, love shall, for once, find utter repletion." - Richard Wagner on _Tristan und Isolde_.

"Don't cry for me, for I go where music is born." - Johann Sebastian Bach's last words.


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## eugeneonagain (May 14, 2017)

"Nothing but icy loneliness that fills the head with emptiness and the heart with sadness."

Erik Satie after the collapse of his love affair with Suzanne Valadon.


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## SONNET CLV (May 31, 2014)

There are two quotations that sadden me, one from Ludwig, the other from Pyotr I.

Neither needs words (coming, as they do from musical composers), but the meaning seems clear in both cases. Tears. And the similarity of the two quotes continues to startle.

















I suspect both Beethoven and Tchaikovsky wept a great deal, though it is certainly easier to think of the one doing so more often than the other. Still, these were sensitive consciousnesses, and both the Fifth Symphony (Beethoven) and the Sixth Symphony (Tchaikovsky) lament tragedy. Beethoven ends his work in triumph, but not before suffering. Still, he is able to rise above his troubles, vanquish his demons, or at least to adjust to them and continue to live successfully in spite of them. Tchaikovsky finds no positive end, and his lament, his tears, seem endless compared to the single _lacrima_ shed by his predecessor. Indeed, the Russian's _lacrima _provides for one of the greatest themes in all of music; there will be nothing small about Tchaikovsky's weeping. No single Beethovenian-like tear.

Composers may say much in a small musical quotation. John Dowland's brief









supplies the germinal thread for his seven great _Lachrimae_ of 1604. Of course Beethoven and Tchaikovsky shared this composer's tears.


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## millionrainbows (Jun 23, 2012)

Allerius said:


> "Never in my life having enjoyed the true happiness of love I shall erect a memorial to this loveliest of all dreams in which, from the first to the last, love shall, for once, find utter repletion." - Richard Wagner on _Tristan und Isolde_.


Is this sad, or is it evidence of Richard Wagner's immense narcissism? He couldn't fall in love because he was too in love with himself. Maybe. I could be wrong.


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## millionrainbows (Jun 23, 2012)

eugeneonagain said:


> "Nothing but icy loneliness that fills the head with emptiness and the heart with sadness."
> 
> Erik Satie after the collapse of his love affair with Suzanne Valadon.


That's funny he uses the term "icy," because there is a story of a visit to his crummy apartment in Paris, and it was so cold that he slept under huge piles of covers.


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## Sid James (Feb 7, 2009)

"I've written this ideologically flawed quartet which nobody will be interested in. I had been musing that if I die some day, I didn't think anyone would write a work dedicated to my memory, so I decided to write one myself...When I got home I twice tried to play it through, and again shed tears, not only because of its tragic essence but also because I was surprised by the beautiful integrity of its form. This was perhaps influenced by a certain element of self-admiration which will probably soon pass to be replaced by the usual hangover of self-criticism."

*- Shostakovich* in a letter dated July 1960, reflecting on his Eighth Quartet. It was originally dedicated to himself, portraying his depressed state after being forced to join the Communist party, but the official dedication was to victims of fascism. Ironically, the false dedication remains today (even in recently published recordings). His son Maxim said Shostakovich cried in front of him only twice - at this time and when his first wife died.


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## eugeneonagain (May 14, 2017)

millionrainbows said:


> That's funny he uses the term "icy," because there is a story of a visit to his crummy apartment in Paris, and it was so cold that he slept under huge piles of covers.


And his curious glass bottles filled with hot water under a hammock, which Stravinsky supposedly saw :lol:. Strange fellow.


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## Xisten267 (Sep 2, 2018)

millionrainbows said:


> Is this sad, or is it evidence of Richard Wagner's immense narcissism? He couldn't fall in love because he was too in love with himself. Maybe. I could be wrong.


He had a troubled and unhappy marriage since 1836, and was 41 when said this. I believe that it's quite sad that someone, particularly a genius like him, can't find true love until such age. And I don't think that Wagner was such a bad person as people often portray him to be.


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## Vronsky (Jan 5, 2015)

"I am in my sixty-first year; I have neither hopes, nor illusions, nor great thoughts left. My son is nearly always absent; I am solitary. My contempt for the folly and meanness of men, my hatred of their detestable ferocity, are at their height, and I say hourly to death: "When you will!" 
Why does he delay?"

~ _Memoir of Hector Berlioz from 1803 to 1865_


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## Zhdanov (Feb 16, 2016)

Sid James said:


> himself, portraying his depressed state after being forced to join the Communist party,


https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dmitri_Shostakovich#Joining_the_Party - and where does it say he was forced?


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## KenOC (Mar 7, 2011)

Some theories about this. One is that a couple of Party people came over to visit and got DSCH quite drunk, then inveigled him into signing the papers requesting Party membership. Remember, you had to be invited to join the Party; it wasn’t something people were normally forced to do.

Another is that he was asked to be the Secretary of the Composer’s Union, a post that required Party membership. But he was never asked to take that position, which remained with Khrennikov.

In any event, if the truth is known, I’ve never seen it.


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## KenOC (Mar 7, 2011)

Maybe not so heartbreaking, but... "No one has a mind any more for what is good, what is vigorous -- in short, for real music! Yes, yes, that's how it is, you Viennese! Rossini and his pals, they're your heroes. You want nothing more from me! Sometimes Schuppanzigh gets a quartet out of me, but you've no time for the symphonies, and you don't want Fidelio. It's Rossini, Rossini above everything. Perhaps your soulless strumming and singing, your own shoddy stuff that you take for real art -- that's your taste. Oh, you Viennese!" --Ludwig


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## Sid James (Feb 7, 2009)

Zhdanov said:


> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dmitri_Shostakovich#Joining_the_Party - and where does it say he was forced?


Is Wikipedia the only source you consult? Give me a break.


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## Sid James (Feb 7, 2009)

KenOC said:


> Some theories about this. One is that a couple of Party people came over to visit and got DSCH quite drunk, then inveigled him into signing the papers requesting Party membership. Remember, you had to be invited to join the Party; it wasn't something people were normally forced to do.
> 
> Another is that he was asked to be the Secretary of the Composer's Union, a post that required Party membership. But he was never asked to take that position, which remained with Khrennikov.
> 
> In any event, if the truth is known, I've never seen it.


He was asked to chair a meeting, but to do that he had to become a party member. Shostakovich feigned illness and called in sick but they simply rescheduled the meeting.

Both of his children have made recollections of the day referred to in the above letter. They had never seen him so distraught, apart from when their mother (his first wife) died. Not even in times when he life was directly under threat during the purges or bombing raids in the war.

All this is good enough evidence for me, apart from the string quartet itself.


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## KenOC (Mar 7, 2011)

Sid James said:


> He was asked to chair a meeting, but to do that he had to become a party member. Shostakovich feigned illness and called in sick but they simply rescheduled the meeting. Both of his children have made recollections of the day referred to in the above letter. They had never seen him so distraught, apart from when their mother (his first wife) died. Not even in times when he life was directly under threat during the purges or bombing raids in the war.
> 
> All this is good enough evidence for me, apart from the string quartet itself.


Doesn't make sense to me. If he didn't want to chair the meeting, why did he become a Party member? How could anybody "force" him to join the Party?


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## Zhdanov (Feb 16, 2016)

Sid James said:


> Is Wikipedia the only source you consult?


no, as neither there's a source you could trust in relation to him being 'forced' etc.



Sid James said:


> Both of his children have made recollections of the day referred to in the above letter.


the question is when they have? right on the spot or after their state's destruction?


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## Sid James (Feb 7, 2009)

KenOC said:


> Doesn't make sense to me. If he didn't want to chair the meeting, why did he become a Party member? How could anybody "force" him to join the Party?


In this case, force doesn't mean violent coercion. For high profile people like Shostakovich, it was more like a strong nudge. In the Soviet system, things could be decided for you whether you agreed or not. Others have made comparisons to living in a prison which is nice, but it's still a prison.

I can provide at least another good example of this from Shostakovich's life but I won't. I didn't contribute to this thread to start a debate. I only wished to answer the OP.


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## Sid James (Feb 7, 2009)

Zhdanov said:


> no, as neither there's a source you could trust in relation to him being 'forced' etc.


Read his letters. I mean the real ones, not disputed sources like Testimony.



> the question is when they have? right on the spot or after their state's destruction?


Why don't you ask them?


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## Zhdanov (Feb 16, 2016)

Sid James said:


> In this case, force doesn't mean violent coercion.


then why use that word at all, other than in order to negatively impress?



Sid James said:


> In the Soviet system, things could be decided for you whether you agreed or not.


like with any other system isn't it?



Sid James said:


> Read his letters.


which one? got any link?



Sid James said:


> Why don't you ask them?


ask, them as of back then or, as of now?


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